Lyrics: “Nurse Practish” By Al Johnson Verse: Papers strewn out on my desk. L4 patient up on deck. Chart review, I need some specs. Checking vitals, counting breaths. Writing notes, refill Rx. Diagnosing, making recs. All these tasks makin’ me stressed. Don’t forget, to take deep breaths. Chorus: Ima nurse practish, Ima, Ima, nurse practich bish Ima nurse practish, Ima, Ima, nurse practich bish Verse: I defied the odds as far as demographics go. I’m a male, a jew, a nurse, a straight, white, dumb, weirdo. Said it once, said it twice, said it all my life. Encoded in society, the messages are rife. There are proper jobs that a nice Jewish boy should be. A CPA and CEO or maybe an MD. Not a nurse cause that’s for girls! And guys that suck and curse! Why you not a doctor? That question is the worst! These messages make me feel, second rate, not ideal. Wait hold on. Fuck all that shit. Results are in, my work is real! Chorus: Ima nurse practish, Ima, Ima, nurse practich bish Ima nurse practish, Ima, Ima, nurse practich bish Verse: Here we are and here we stand and here’s more honest feelings. The last decade I’ve learned about improving folks well-being. As I reflect on my life’s work and that of those around me. At least my job is useful. Helping others makes me happy. Final Chorus: Ima nurse practish, Ima, Ima, nurse practich bish Ima nurse practish, Ima, Ima, nurse practich bish Ima nurse practish. Ima nurse practich. And a jazz mucish.