<description>&lt;p&gt;&lt;em&gt;Why did we try to find LOVE IN GLACIER NATIONAL PARK (&lt;/em&gt;&lt;a href="https://www.imdb.com/title/tt25049966/" target= "_blank" rel="noopener"&gt;2025&lt;/a&gt;&lt;em&gt;)? Because it is there. As is…&lt;/em&gt;&lt;/p&gt; &lt;p&gt;&lt;strong&gt;TEASER:&lt;/strong&gt;&lt;/p&gt; &lt;p&gt;The horniest avalanche-safety film we've ever seen, trapped in the Beavis terrarium of the ancestral mind, with Steve.&lt;/p&gt; &lt;p&gt;&lt;strong&gt;THEME:&lt;/strong&gt; "&lt;a href= "https://www.amazon.com/Fuck-You-Dont-Like-Christmas/dp/B004BF78WI" target="_blank" rel= "noopener"&gt;Fuck You If You Don't Like Christmas&lt;/a&gt;," from Crudbump, by Drew Fairweather&lt;/p&gt; &lt;p&gt;&lt;strong&gt;PART ONE&lt;span class= "Apple-converted-space"&gt; &lt;/span&gt;&lt;/strong&gt;&lt;/p&gt; &lt;p&gt;Is the Angel Jason Giambi? … Avalanche safety tips … A feast of table-read first takes … Extreme Hallmark throwback … The title! … &lt;strong&gt;Cast Rundown&lt;/strong&gt; … &lt;strong&gt;The Expositional Challenge&lt;/strong&gt; … &lt;strong&gt;Plot Mop-Up:&lt;/strong&gt; Samantha, dog trainer, mom's apprentice; Sonya, stupid sexy Flanders mode … Beavis-world vision … Not pregnant, adios! … Swimmers … IVF and climate change … Star Trek: TNG, S1 … Better than the Trail of Tears one…&lt;/p&gt; &lt;p&gt;&lt;strong&gt;PART TWO&lt;span class= "Apple-converted-space"&gt; &lt;/span&gt;&lt;/strong&gt;&lt;/p&gt; &lt;p&gt;&lt;strong&gt;Spot the Angel:&lt;/strong&gt; Nope … &lt;strong&gt;Eat Your Heart Out:&lt;/strong&gt; Hot cocoa, food pyramid foundation; Hi-C goblets, unnatural wine; root beer float highball; banana/peanut butter croissant … Chris's disrespect and aspirin advice … &lt;strong&gt;The Hallmark Expanded Universe:&lt;/strong&gt; Stephen Huszar's ski-guy persona) and the hermetic placelessness of the Hallmark Alpine Biome … Andy Lack (derogatory) … &lt;strong&gt;Overdetermined:&lt;/strong&gt; An effing manchild; Dead Mom; Frisky Dingo … Epic photo of epicry … Anti-fizz…&lt;span class="Apple-converted-space"&gt; &lt;/span&gt;&lt;/p&gt; &lt;p&gt;&lt;strong&gt;PART THREE&lt;/strong&gt;&lt;/p&gt; &lt;p&gt;&lt;strong&gt;The Hallmark Voight-Kampff Test:&lt;/strong&gt; Chris, no growth, no person … The Joe Morgan Moneyball Universe … &lt;strong&gt;Great Moments in Moppetry:&lt;/strong&gt; 2, director Mom, tough script, posterizing Sonya, plumper … &lt;strong&gt;Who's the Real Villain?:&lt;/strong&gt; Those who ignore avalanche safety, false binary, misplaced blame, idiot skepticism … &lt;strong&gt;Rating:&lt;/strong&gt; 1.5 … Pointlessly mean, obviously Whistler … Stock footage, iced tea and 11º…&lt;span class="Apple-converted-space"&gt; &lt;/span&gt;&lt;/p&gt; &lt;p&gt;&lt;strong&gt;PART FOUR&lt;/strong&gt;&lt;/p&gt; &lt;p&gt;&lt;strong&gt;The Leftovers:&lt;/strong&gt; The three most Canadian extras in history … The beautiful, talented Melvin … Melvin taxonomy … &lt;strong&gt;IMDB Dive:&lt;/strong&gt; Stephen Huszar's better than this … Rabid remake … White supremacist sex tourist … Cops making fascists cry … In loving memory of outdoor Rambo III enthusiasts … Unwelcome antique National Parks feelings … Merry Christmas!&lt;span class= "Apple-converted-space"&gt; &lt;/span&gt; • All other music by Chris Collingwood of &lt;a href= "https://www.amazon.com/Look-Park/dp/B01DQ0T5J2/ref=ice_ac_b_dpb?ie=UTF8&amp;qid=1512608928&amp;sr=8-1&amp;keywords=Look+Park" target="_blank" rel="noopener"&gt;Look Park&lt;/a&gt; and &lt;a href= "https://www.amazon.com/s/ref=nb_sb_noss_1?url=search-alias=aps&amp;field-keywords=fountains+of+wayne&amp;rh=i:aps,k:fountains+of+wayne" target="_blank" rel="noopener"&gt;Fountains of Wayne&lt;/a&gt;, except: "Orchestral Sports Theme" by Chris Collingwood and Rick Murnane.&lt;/p&gt;</description>

It's Christmastown

Vigorous Marvin

139 - Snow Crashing the Joe Morgan Moneyball Universe

OCT 9, 202571 MIN
It's Christmastown

139 - Snow Crashing the Joe Morgan Moneyball Universe

OCT 9, 202571 MIN

Description

Why did we try to find LOVE IN GLACIER NATIONAL PARK (2025)? Because it is there. As is… TEASER: The horniest avalanche-safety film we've ever seen, trapped in the Beavis terrarium of the ancestral mind, with Steve. THEME: "Fuck You If You Don't Like Christmas," from Crudbump, by Drew Fairweather PART ONE Is the Angel Jason Giambi? … Avalanche safety tips … A feast of table-read first takes … Extreme Hallmark throwback … The title! … Cast Rundown … The Expositional Challenge … Plot Mop-Up: Samantha, dog trainer, mom's apprentice; Sonya, stupid sexy Flanders mode … Beavis-world vision … Not pregnant, adios! … Swimmers … IVF and climate change … Star Trek: TNG, S1 … Better than the Trail of Tears one… PART TWO Spot the Angel: Nope … Eat Your Heart Out: Hot cocoa, food pyramid foundation; Hi-C goblets, unnatural wine; root beer float highball; banana/peanut butter croissant … Chris's disrespect and aspirin advice … The Hallmark Expanded Universe: Stephen Huszar's ski-guy persona) and the hermetic placelessness of the Hallmark Alpine Biome … Andy Lack (derogatory) … Overdetermined: An effing manchild; Dead Mom; Frisky Dingo … Epic photo of epicry … Anti-fizz… PART THREE The Hallmark Voight-Kampff Test: Chris, no growth, no person … The Joe Morgan Moneyball Universe … Great Moments in Moppetry: 2, director Mom, tough script, posterizing Sonya, plumper … Who's the Real Villain?: Those who ignore avalanche safety, false binary, misplaced blame, idiot skepticism … Rating: 1.5 … Pointlessly mean, obviously Whistler … Stock footage, iced tea and 11º… PART FOUR The Leftovers: The three most Canadian extras in history … The beautiful, talented Melvin … Melvin taxonomy … IMDB Dive: Stephen Huszar's better than this … Rabid remake … White supremacist sex tourist … Cops making fascists cry … In loving memory of outdoor Rambo III enthusiasts … Unwelcome antique National Parks feelings … Merry Christmas! • All other music by Chris Collingwood of Look Park and Fountains of Wayne, except: "Orchestral Sports Theme" by Chris Collingwood and Rick Murnane.