The Authentic Man Podcast with David Chambers

From attaching too quickly and over-sharing on early dates… to mistaking uncertainty for rejection — this solo episode breaks down the hidden ways anxiously attached men sabotage emotional intimacy in dating, often without realizing it. Instead of blaming emotionally unavailable women, bad luck, or thinking you're "too much," David reveals the real issue: 👉 Anxious attachment isn't about being needy — it's about struggling to regulate uncertainty, boundaries, and emotional safety in the body. If you find yourself chasing reassurance, pushing for clarity too soon, texting excessively, blowing through your own boundaries, or losing yourself in relationships, this episode offers a clear roadmap for slowing down, rebuilding self-respect, and creating attraction and intimacy that actually lasts. 📌 Topics Covered in This Episode Why Anxious Attachment Damages Emotional Intimacy in Dating ✅ Attaching too quickly and fantasizing about the future early on ✅ Over-disclosure and why it creates intensity, not intimacy ✅ How reactive "nice" behavior is felt as chaotic ✅ Why blowing through your own boundaries erodes self-respect ✅ Pushing for clarity to soothe anxiety — and why it backfires ✅ Excessive texting as a way to regulate uncertainty ✅ Being overly available and unintentionally downgrading your value ✅ Interpreting ambiguity as rejection and reacting from fear ✅ Why anxiously attached men often choose emotionally unavailable partners How to Break the Pattern & Build Secure Attraction ✅ Learning to regulate uncertainty instead of forcing certainty ✅ Creating intimacy without fast-tracking closeness ✅ Holding boundaries without fear of abandonment ✅ Letting attraction build through grounded leadership ✅ Developing a full life so connection becomes a choice, not a need ✅ Recognizing emotional availability — and becoming available yourself ✅ Building presence instead of reacting from anxiety ✅ Choosing differently when old urges arise ➡️ Build secure attachment & confident dating skills: https://www.theauthenticman.net/ Follow / Connect: Instagram — @theauthenticman_ For Coaching: 📧 [email protected] Newsletter: https://www.theauthenticman.net/home-subscribe

Alison Armstrong is a leading relationship expert and teacher who has spent over 35 years studying how men and women think, communicate, and relate. She is the author of The Queen's Code and the founder of PAX Programs, through which she has helped millions of people transform their relationships by understanding the instincts that drive human behavior. Alison's work is known for its depth, clarity, and practical insights that foster respect, connection, and lasting partnership. Key Topics: ⭐ Why Men Are So Often Misunderstood By Women ⭐ The Long Journey Of Studying Men Since 1991 ⭐ From "Unhealthy Men" To Healthy Misinterpretations ⭐ A Cave That Kept Getting Bigger: Understanding Male Complexity ⭐ Blind Spots That Prevent Women From Seeing Men Clearly ⭐ Mission-Driven Activism And Its Link To Gender Dynamics ⭐ Protection As An Instinct, Not A Character Flaw ⭐ Energy, Time, And Resources As Male Priorities ⭐ Procreate, Protect, Provide: The Hierarchy Of Male Instincts ⭐ Concealment, Threat Perception, And Emotional Safety ⭐ How Justification Leads To Diminishing Others ⭐ The Ever-Presence Of Death Shaping Men's Lives Connect With David - The Authentic Man: Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/theauthenticman_/ Website: https://www.theauthenticman.net/ For Coaching: [email protected] Newsletter: https://www.theauthenticman.net/home-subscribe Connect With Alison Armstrong: https://www.instagram.com/thealisonarmstrong/ https://www.alisonarmstrong.com/

From trying desperately to be a "good man"… to realizing that avoiding discomfort is what slowly destroys intimacy — this solo episode breaks down why so many men avoid hard conversations and how that pattern quietly sabotages relationships. Instead of blaming "sensitive partners," conflict, or thinking you're just bad at communication, David reveals the real issue: 👉 Most avoidant and nice-guy men were conditioned to believe that upsetting a woman makes them a bad man — and that belief keeps them silent, disconnected, and resentful. If you shut down, avoid asking for space, stay quiet about sex or unmet needs, or leave relationships without ever saying what was wrong, this episode gives you the roadmap for building emotional capacity, self-trust, and mature leadership in relationships. 📌 Topics Covered in This Episode Why Men Avoid Speaking the Truth in Relationships ✅ The "good man" conditioning that teaches men to avoid upsetting women ✅ Why fearing her reaction leads to emotional shutdown and resentment ✅ How shame — not kindness — drives silence and people-pleasing ✅ The hidden cost of avoiding conflict: erosion of intimacy and self-trust ✅ Why avoiding hard conversations slowly kills relationships ✅ How unspoken needs turn into disengagement and eventual breakup ✅ The myth that "not hurting her" makes you a good partner ✅ Why leadership requires emotional courage, not passivity How to Break the Pattern & Communicate Without Destroying the Relationship ✅ Why you must be willing to upset, disappoint, or be disliked ✅ Separating cruelty from necessary truth-telling ✅ How to ask for space without abandoning connection ✅ Speaking about sex, needs, and boundaries without shame ✅ Building emotional capacity to stay present with her reactions ✅ Why her upset is not a verdict on your worth ✅ Trusting repair instead of fearing disconnection ✅ Becoming a grounded man who can lead difficult conversations 🔥 What to Do Next 👇 Comment below: Where have you been avoiding speaking up — space, sex, needs, or boundaries? ➡️ Join the Waitlist for David's Men's Program "Relate" https://forms.gle/2AXhmyNweasETaso7 🔥 Work With David Email: [email protected] https://www.theauthenticman.net/ Follow / Connect Instagram: @theauthenticman_ Newsletter: https://www.theauthenticman.net/home-... LIKE. SHARE. SUBSCRIBE. Give this video a thumbs up if you enjoyed watching 👍 #relationships #men #communication #avoidantattachment #niceguy #dating

If you've ever felt like you're not "man enough," questioned whether you're measuring up, or silently compared yourself to other men — this episode will hit home. David breaks down why so many men feel they're failing at their own definition of masculinity, how the "man box" silently shapes your self-worth, and why tying your value to providing, strength, or achievement leaves you anxious, disconnected, and stuck in a loop of never feeling enough. Drawing from 15 years of coaching and his personal journey from performance-driven masculinity to grounded, embodied confidence, David reveals the hidden wounds and outdated beliefs driving today's masculinity crisis. Most importantly, he lays out a clear, practical roadmap for shifting from performance masculinity to embodied masculinity — so you can build presence, emotional range, purpose, and deep relational leadership without losing your edge. Whether you're single, dating, or deep into a partnership, this episode is your guide to redefining masculinity on your own terms — and finally stepping into a version of manhood that strengthens your mental health, your relationships, and your life. Key Topics: ⭐ The masculinity crisis: why 63% of men feel they're not "man enough" ⭐ The provider mindset and why men tie their worth to money ⭐ The "man box" and how it silently controls male behavior ⭐ Masculinity as performance vs. masculinity as identity ⭐ Men's core wound: feeling "not enough" ⭐ Approval-based masculinity and external validation ⭐ The hidden link between masculinity and male depression ⭐ Why financial stress destroys men's mental health ⭐ Emotional suppression and its psychological cost ⭐ Healthy masculinity vs. toxic dominance ⭐ Emotional openness as a new masculine strength ⭐ Nervous system regulation and emotional self-control ⭐ Relational leadership instead of control and domination ⭐ Redefining "providing" beyond just money Connect With David - The Authentic Man: Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/theauthenticman_/ Website: https://www.theauthenticman.net/ For Coaching: [email protected] Newsletter: https://www.theauthenticman.net/home-subscribe

From feeling terrified to speak up… to finally understanding how to share emotions without shutdown or chaos — this solo episode breaks down why avoidant men struggle to express themselves and exactly how to change the pattern. Instead of blaming conflict, "overreacting partners," or thinking you're just bad at emotions, David reveals the real issue: 👉 Most avoidant men were conditioned to believe emotional expression leads to danger — shame, punishment, overwhelm, or chaos. If you shut down, overthink, avoid hard conversations, or feel misunderstood, this episode gives you the roadmap for building safety, emotional capacity, and mature communication. 📌 Topics Covered in This Episode Why Men Fear Speaking Up in Relationships ✅ How childhood conditioning creates emotional shutdown ✅ Punishment, mockery & misattunement — the roots of avoidant behavior ✅ Why imagined reactions feel REAL and overwhelming ✅ The shutdown loop: overthinking → fear → silence → resentment ✅ How anxious–avoidant dynamics escalate conflict ✅ Understanding emotional delay & why avoidant men need processing time ✅ Shame, fear of "ruining everything," and the belief of not being good enough ✅ Why emotional capacity — not logic — determines connection How to Break the Pattern & Communicate Clearly ✅ Separate what you want to say from your imagined reaction ✅ Scripts that reduce fear and open safe dialogue ✅ How to ask for space without triggering conflict ✅ Feeling your emotions vs thinking about them ✅ The power of pausing before responding ✅ Growing emotional capacity so you can stay steady during big reactions ✅ Why her reaction is not a verdict on your worth ✅ Regulating your nervous system so conversations don't feel like danger 🔥 What to Do Next ➡️ Join the Waitlist for David's Men's Program "Relate" https://forms.gle/2AXhmyNweasETaso7 🔥 Work With David Email: [email protected] https://www.theauthenticman.net/ Follow / Connect Instagram: www.instagram.com/theauthenticman_ Newsletter: https://www.theauthenticman.net/home-subscribe