Description
<p>#241</p><p>🍿 watch on <a href="https://open.spotify.com/show/53JGhfgwgD92PjNTpBukzH"><u>spotify</u></a> & <a href="https://www.youtube.com/@ShePersistedPodcast"><u>youtube</u></a></p><p>💌 <a href="https://shepersistedpodcast.com/ask-a-question"><u>ask me a question</u></a> or leave feedback on the podcast!</p><p>here’s the truth: <strong>you cannot resent someone for a need you’ve never communicated.</strong> but most of our day-to-day frustration comes from exactly that — unspoken expectations, misunderstood triggers, and assumptions we never check.</p><p>in this solo episode, i walk you through the exact rule, mindset shifts, and dbt skills i use to prevent resentment from silently wrecking relationships — with friends, partners, siblings, coworkers, anyone.</p><p>by the end, you’ll know <strong>how to say what you need clearly, kindly, and confidently</strong>… without guilt, without drama, and without letting resentment build in the background.</p><p><strong>i talk about:</strong></p><p>• the “resentment rule” that completely shifts your relationships</p><p>• why gen z is great at identifying triggers but avoids voicing needs</p><p>• how resentment grows from assumptions — and how to stop it</p><p>• how to actually use dbt’s <strong>dearman</strong> to make a clear request</p><p>• why your ask must always have a yes/no answer</p><p>• how to identify the real issue underneath irritation or hurt</p><p>• the dbt <strong>check the facts</strong> skill and why it prevents so much unnecessary conflict</p><p>• how to talk about needs without being passive-aggressive or avoidant</p><p>• the <strong>fast</strong> skill for communicating boundaries without losing self-respect</p><p>• how to stop people-pleasing while still protecting the relationship</p><p>• exactly how to phrase a specific, doable change someone can make</p><p>• when naming a trigger “tames it”… and when you actually need something to change</p><p><strong>mentioned:</strong></p><p>• <a href="https://mydoctor.kaiserpermanente.org/ncal/Images/Interpersonal%20Effectiveness%20DBT%20Skills%20ADA_04302020_tcm75-1599002.pdf"><u>dbt interpersonal effectiveness worksheets</u></a></p><p><br></p><p>☕giveaway! want coffee on me? every month, i gift one listener a <strong>starbucks gift card</strong> <strong>to enter</strong>:</p><p>1. leave a review on apple or spotify</p><p>2. dm me a screenshot on instagram</p><p>📲 bonus entries for story or tiktok tags!<br></p><p><a href="https://www.instagram.com/shepersistedpodcast"><u>@shepersistedpodcast</u></a></p><p><a href="https://shepersistedpodcast.com"><u>shepersistedpodcast.com</u></a></p><p><a href="mailto:[email protected]"><u>[email protected]</u></a> </p><p>© 2025 SHE PERSISTED LLC. all rights reserved.<br></p>
