The Body Love Binge - Eating Disorder Recovery Podcast

Body Love Binge Interview with Jessi Kneeland - Body Neutrality, Self-Objectification & The Avatars

In this fascinating conversation, I sit down with Jessi Kneeland, body image coach and author of "Body Neutral." We dive deep into body neutrality vs body positivity, why we assign false significance to our bodies, the four body image avatars, and how self-objectification keeps us stuck seeing ourselves from the outside in. This episode is essential for anyone who's tired of trying to love how they look and wants actual freedom.

Key Quotes from the Episode:

💬 "Body neutrality is stripping the body of false or inflated significance, as opposed to trying to love how you look."

💬 "We experience body image suffering when we've assigned our body a task, role, or purpose it can't fulfill."

💬 "Women learn that their worth and value is based on making other people feel happy and comfortable - providing what others want rather than going after what they want."

💬 "The first compliments little girls get are about how they look or how they're nice. Both are about other people experiencing you, not about you at all."

💬 "If your body is the only thing that matters to a guy, that saved you so much time. Your dream person would never make you question your worth based on your size."

What We Cover in This Episode:

✨ Body neutrality vs body positivity - Why trying to love how you look isn't realistic for most people, and what actually works instead

✨ The false significance we assign to bodies - How body image distress is different from preferences, and why some things have the power to ruin your day

✨ Where we learn body obsession - How patriarchy, diet culture, and beauty ideals teach us that our worth is relative and based on attractiveness

✨ The confirmation bias trap - Why your brain gathers massive evidence to prove you're unworthy whilst ignoring anything that contradicts it

✨ Self-objectification and the male gaze - Learning to see ourselves from the outside in, and why women ask "will he like me?" instead of "will I like him?"

✨ The four body image avatars - Self-objectifier, outsider, high achiever, and runner - and how each represents different root causes

✨ Why being "average" feels like an insult - The high achiever's ranking spreadsheet and living in constant fear of being displaced

✨ Attraction beyond appearance - How relationships are NOT based on objective ranking systems, and why pheromones matter more than abs

✨ The exhausting strategy of trying to prevent rejection with your body - Why outsourcing tasks to your body that it can't accomplish keeps you obsessing forever

✨ How Jessi lives in body neutrality - Having preferences without attachment, and why lack of attachment is the safest, kindest choice

✨ Clothing as daily practice - Centring how you feel over how you look, and why "flattering" is the wrong goal

✨ Age, ageing, and body image - How ageing out of beauty ideals creates unique identity and existential challenges

This episode will completely shift how you think about body image work - from trying to feel beautiful to simply stripping your body of the power to ruin your life.

In this powerful conversation, I sit down with Laura Nagiel, a confidence and dating coach for high-achieving women. We dive deep into the difference between confidence and self-esteem, why control-oriented women struggle in dating, and how to step into your feminine energy without losing your strength. This episode is gold for anyone navigating relationships whilst healing their relationship with themselves.

Key Quotes from the Episode:

💬 "Confidence is built through action. Self-love and self-esteem is how we see ourselves, what we deep down believe we are worthy of."

💬 "Your relationships are a mirror of your self-esteem at the time. If your relationships aren't improving as you're doing the work, you're not actually doing the work."

💬 "If you're strong masculine and you want your man to also be strong masculine, it doesn't work. These magnets are pushing each other away."

💬 "Feminine energy is creativity, fertility, ideas. It's making a home out of a house, creating good vibes. You don't have to be shy and quiet to be feminine."

💬 "If your body is the only thing that matters to that guy, and so he leaves or you leave, that saved you so much time. Your dream man would never make you question your worth."

What I Cover in This Episode:

✨ The crucial difference between confidence and self-esteem - Why you can appear confident but still feel unworthy, and how this shows up in dating

✨ The toxic relationship pattern - How low self-esteem creates a track record of narcissists and messy situations

✨ Creating your vision before you date - The four categories to define what you want in a partner (and who you need to become)

✨ Why Type A women struggle with dating - How being control-oriented, perfectionistic, and in your masculine energy repels the man you say you want

✨ Masculine vs feminine energy in relationships - Understanding polarity and why "strong personality seeking stronger man" doesn't work

✨ The misconception about feminine energy - It's not weakness, shyness, or diminishing your achievements - it's creativity, magnetism, and strength

✨ How to ask for your needs without being controlling - The power of praise, gratitude, and inspiring rather than demanding

✨ Navigating sex and intimacy with confidence - Using touch and body language instead of over-intellectualising everything

✨ Body image in dating - Why authentic photos save you time, and how the right person loves your essence, not just your size

✨ The second mode for high achievers - Creating feminine energy as an intentional way of being without losing your professional edge

✨ Laura's guaranteed framework - How she helps clients find their person within six months by addressing root causes

This episode is essential listening for anyone who's recovered (or recovering) from an eating disorder and wants to date confidently, understand their worth, and attract a healthy relationship.

In this powerful conversation, I sit down with teacher and mind-body guide Sam Miller to unpack why your symptoms aren’t the problem, they’re your body’s solution. We dig into repression, the shadow, nervous system myths, and how to actually allow emotions to complete so you can return to real regulation (without biohacks, force, or fixing).