The Reconnection Club Podcast

Episode 1 Redux Most parents who are unwillingly estranged from their adult children worry about time passing while they're estranged. They know life is short. Grandchildren grow up fast. Time is not unlimited. This makes parents anxious to reconnect, which is understandable. But acting on anxiety too often leads to ineffective behaviors. In this revitalization of a classic episode, RC Podcast host Tina Gilbertson, LPC, offers thoughts on why Time can be a friend to parents in pain over estrangement. She names five different gifts that Time can bestow, and suggests how parents can make use of them while estranged. This soothing episode will help listeners treat the time they have as truly precious, encouraging them not to lose opportunities by helplessly longing for change. For evidence-based information and tools to repair your relationship with your estranged adult child(ren), read Tina's book, Reconnecting With Your Estranged Adult Child (Amazon link: https://amzn.to/2ZhetMe ) Club members can discuss this and every episode in the General Discussion forum inside the Reconnection Club at https://reconnectionclub.com/community/forum/general. Not a member yet? Learn more and join at https://reconnectionclub.com. Follow Tina Gilbertson on Substack: https://tinagilbertson.substack.com. EPISODE LINKS: Reconnection Club Podcast Ep. 155: Good Grief - https://reconnectionclub.com/155

In this fascinating 2-part episode (see link below for Part 1), host Tina Gilbertson explores the impact on siblings of adult child estrangement. If your estranged adult child has a brother, sister, or multiple siblings, you'll want to listen to this series carefully. You'll discover how to support the ones left behind; whether your other adult children will become estranged too; and what to do if an estranged adult child actively recruits their sibling(s) into estrangement. Whether your estranged adult child has siblings or not, you'll find evidence-based information and tools to repair your relationship in Tina's book, Reconnecting With Your Estranged Adult Child. Reconnection Club members can discuss this and every episode in the General Discussion forum inside the Reconnection Club. Not a member yet? Learn more and join at https://reconnectionclub.com. Follow Tina Gilbertson on Substack: https://tinagilbertson.substack.com EPISODE LINKS: Reconnection Club Podcast Episode 219: Siblings and Estrangement, Part 1 - https://reconnectionclub.com/219 Reconnection Club Podcast Episode 149: From Enmeshment to Estrangement, Part 1 - https://reconnectionclub.com/149 Reconnection Club Podcast Episode 150: From Enmeshment to Estrangement, Part 2 - https://reconnectionclub.com/150 Reconnection Club Podcast Episode 60: Same House, Different Childhoods - https://reconnectionclub.com/60 General Discussion forum (login required)

From an interview with Anne Dickson, Ph.D. In this insightful episode, you'll learn about the critical interplay between assertiveness, boundaries, and emotions. Reconnection Club Podcast host Tina Gilbertson shares an excerpt from her interview with assertiveness expert and author Anne Dickson, who explains how early experiences shape our understanding of anger. Key insights about the emotional lessons learned during childhood are discussed, offering valuable perspectives for anyone grappling with boundaries, children and anger today. The thought-provoking ideas you'll hear may challenge your view of boundaries. They'll certainly prompt reflection on personal experiences, and encourage an ongoing commitment to healthy relationships – especially establishing limits. For evidence-based information and tools to repair your relationship with your estranged adult child(ren), read Tina's book, Reconnecting With Your Estranged Adult Child. Reconnection Club members can discuss this and every episode in the General Discussion forum inside the Reconnection Club. Not a member yet? Learn more and join. Follow Tina Gilbertson on Substack EPISODE LINKS: RC Podcast Episode 174: "How to set boundaries without making them mad?" RC Podcast Episode 198: Validation (Or Lack Thereof) Full Interview with Anne Dickson (login required) A Woman In Your Own Right by Anne Dickson Anne Dickson - Official website

Did you know that intentionally tolerating anxiety can help you make clearer decisions, and even find moments of joy, during an unwanted estrangement from your adult child(ren)? In this useful episode, Reconnection Club host Tina Gilbertson talks about the importance (and practicality) of tolerating anxiety when facing estrangement from adult children. Tina explains how anxiety comes from our own thoughts and feelings, not just from what happens to us. She shares five practical steps to help parents manage anxiety so it doesn't influence important decisions during estrangement. You'll hear why it's helpful to separate the urge to soothe anxiety from the desire to reconnect with your estranged adult child(ren). In a nutshell, contacting them out of anxiety can lead to regret. That's why Tina encourages parents to focus on calming their anxiety first, through both top-down and bottom-up techniques that help them relax. By managing anxiety, rejected parents can think more clearly and make better choices about how to respond -- rather than react -- to their adult children's estrangement. Finally, Tina reminds listeners that there will be times when they feel calm, and it's important to use those moments to learn, plan, and even enjoy life. For evidence-based information and tools to repair your relationship with your estranged adult child(ren), read Tina's book, Reconnecting With Your Estranged Adult Child. Club members can discuss this and every episode in the General Discussion forum inside the Reconnection Club. Not a member yet? Learn more and join. Follow us on Instagram. EPISODE LINKS: https://directory.traumahealing.org https://www.polyvagalinstitute.org/whatispolyvagaltheory https://hakomiinstitute.com/about/what-is-hakomi Reconnection Club Podcast Ep. 144: What's Your Strategy? [https://reconnectionclub.com/144] Reconnection Club Podcast Ep. 97: The Road Map to Reconnection, Part 1 [https://reconnectionclub.com/97] Constructive Wallowing: How to Beat Bad Feelings By Letting Yourself Have Them [ https://amzn.to/2Zbc0S2 ] Reconnection Club Podcast Ep. 69: It's OK to Enjoy Yourself During Estrangement [https://reconnectionclub.com/69]

You feel it when your estranged (or formerly estranged) adult child is in the room. The conversation is surface-level. You second-guess everything. You remind yourself, "I have to be careful." "Walking on eggshells" is a common experience for parents of estranged adult children, especially during the reconciliation phase of estrangement. Parents might not know exactly why their child became distant, but they want to keep it from happening again. Some parents feel afraid of making their child angry. They desperately want to avoid conflict, even while wishing for more closeness. They're caught between fear and longing. Almost all parents feel awkward after estrangement, as they embrace different skills and behaviors for the first time. The journey from "conscious incompetence" to "conscious competence" and beyond, can be long. Ongoing tension can be expected after estrangement, in the context of your personal history. And there may be no getting around that walking-on-eggshells feeling for a while. But parents who can recognize, understand, and tolerate it might have an easier time. EPISODE LINKS: Reconnection Club Podcast Ep. 132: Self-Care for Parents of Estranged Adult Children Therapist directories... https://traumatherapistnetwork.com https://www.psychologytoday.com https://www.goodtherapy.org For evidence-based information and tools to repair your relationship with your estranged adult child(ren), read Tina's book, Reconnecting With Your Estranged Adult Child. Club members can discuss this and every episode in the General Discussion forum inside the Reconnection Club. Not a member yet? Learn more and join. Follow us on Instagram.