Down to a sunless sea: memories of my dad

General content note for the series: death, dementia, old age, mental health issues Additional content note: sex, assisted dying, war This episode is the last episode of the first (and possibly last) season of this show, and it's about legacy.

I've been planning this show for years. The earliest recording I've used was recorded by my dad on cassette tape in 1984. This show has covered 96 years of my dad's life and 38 years of mine. I started recording interviews with my dad in 2011 and began writing essays about our relationship and his journey through old age towards death in 2017. I'm glad I made this show. That it hasn't just remained an imagined show. It's been a tough journey at times, but it's one I'm so glad I've made. Thanks for travelling on it with me.

General content note for the series: death, dementia, old age, mental health issues Extra content note: grief, suicide, terminal illness, abuse, bereavement

General content note for the series: death, dementia, old age, mental health issues Additional content note: euthanasia/suicide But no matter what he forgets, it can't take away the love we have shared, that existed, and will always have existed, even when he has forgotten it; even when he is no longer alive to remember it; even when I have forgotten it; even when I am no longer alive to remember it. It happened. And that has to be enough.

This episode is about movement, memory, change, time, distance, tears, connection, therapy, sadness, love, grief and everything else that can come in waves.

General content note for the series: death, dementia, old age, mental health issues Extra content note: bereavement, pain, terminal illness (including cancer) and the caste system In the seventh full episode of the podcast using content funded by the British Podcast Awards and the Wellcome Trust I talk to Khyati Tripathi about studying death. This is an episode about understanding and navigating mortality and creating spaces where we can talk about difficult and taboo topics.

General content note for the series: death, dementia, old age, mental health issues Additional content note: euthanasia/suicide

I realised that maybe our positions aren't that different after all. And I wondered if, in the moments that I manage to believe in hope, I seem as inspiring and naïve as he does. It made me wonder if maybe the spark I see in him, that belief in people and ideas, if that isn't also in me, despite my frequent feeling that it isn't. If I might communicate that to other people regardless. If the world as humans know it lasts for long enough for me to reach a similar age as my dad, I wonder if I will be someone who frustrates and delights young people with my faith in them, whether I will still accept the possibility of hope and change?

This episode is about belief, hope and progress. It considers technological change, generational change, spiritual change and political change.