Dear Westwood Community,
When, as infants, we went to sleep the very first time without the sound of our mother’s heartbeat reverberating in our ears, we began to say goodbye. These goodbyes are “little deaths” that we will experience for the rest of our lives as we prepare for our final death knell. Grief and fear punctuate our little deaths and perhaps even stand watch over our final death.They shape our personalities in such a commanding way, that many of us will do anything we can to avoid thinking about separation, death, and dying. The undertow of fear and grief is strong as we try to avoid life cycles or the “breasting of the rough seas,” as St. Teresa tells us.
I have a feeling that you’ve been concerned about the outcome of our elections next week. Who knows what little deaths we will suffer. Who knows how our griefs and fears across the country and the world are already taking hold of us as we say goodbye to one era and enter another.
This week in Sunday school we’ll be focusing on All Saints’ Day as well as Día de los Muertos. We will bring photographs or draw pictures of those we have cherished who have now passed on into the arms of God. I love this custom. I love that we don’t shy away from talking about death. I love especially that as Christians we believe that after death we can “reside in the shadow of the Most High” as our Jewish friends reveal to us. I love that love is stronger than death, that goodbyes are never final. I love that our faith teaches us an openness to life and death and life beyond death. We are taught that we are not alone; God is with us. And in our remembering at this time of year, our community remembers with us.
Last Sunday when I announced to the children that I am retiring, several asked me who my replacement would be. I could see sadness, fear, grief, but even adventure! One of our kids piped up, “Can a child be the leader?” Look at that. The life-giving love that comes out of goodbyes. Yes, indeed, Kyle, that question of yours is a part of the seed that we’ve been planting in you: to be leaders as you follow Christ! You can’t yet be a grownup leader of our children’s ministry, but for sure you can be a strong, adventurous leader in the faith.
It is a goodbye for me as leader of children. It is a little death. On my last Sunday, December 29th, as Pastor of Children & Families, I will have worked with these beloved children for exactly five years. What a blessing! As you may have sensed, I have delighted in working with Deanna, the pastoral staff, the children, and the children’s ministry team. I have felt called to offer my best theological and pedagogical training and experience to this fabulous church. Parting will be sorrowful for me, but necessary for this season in my life when I need to slow down. I won’t be leaving the church. In fact, Pastor Molly has already signed me up to preach on January 19, and Isabel Kilroe, the new head of the liturgical dancers wanted to make sure I could dance with them. Shirley Williams even quipped, “That means you’re going to sing with the choir, right?”
I hope to move with ease between The Sanctuary and The Loft, because of the deep friendships I have developed with the parents from both settings. These connections have fed my soul and helped me see a stronger future for our church. I’m proud to say that we will be having our first parents/grandparents meeting on Sunday where the purpose is to see how we can support our neurodivergent families. Can’t wait to see what will come of this step into deeper inclusivity!
And, finally, I must say a word about our precious team.
