The Collaborative IEP

Have you ever walked into an IEP meeting and immediately felt it? The tension. The forced smiles. The “we’re fine” energy that is very much not fine.In this episode, we talk about what to do when the room feels hostile before the first agenda item is even mentioned — when people look uncomfortable, defensive, or already annoyed… and you’re trying to advocate without getting pulled into the emotional undertow.When the vibe gets tense, some of us talk too much, shut down, over-explain, fidget, or accidentally let our face do the talking. So we start with self-awareness — because knowing your default response is the first step toward changing the dynamic.Then, I walk you through three practical strategies to help soften the room and keep the meeting focused on the child:Disarm the tension by modeling a collaborative, child-centered spirit (and rerouting the discussion back to your child, again and again)Use calm, open body language and regulated communication to support agreement and de-escalationMake the environment more comfortable with intentional “meeting energy” shifts — including small talk, seating choices, and yes… sometimes even treatsWe also talk about the subtle things that matter more than you’d think: tone of voice, facial expressions, where you sit at the table, how you enter the meeting, and how to avoid getting stuck in a tense posture that signals “battle mode.”If your IEP meetings feel like you’re walking into a storm cloud — and you want tools to shift the atmosphere before it derails the conversation — this episode will help you approach those moments with more calm, more strategy, and more control.(And if you bring cookies… please bring ones you actually want to eat.)

Advocating for your child can feel isolating, exhausting, and deeply personal. Even when you understand the system, there are moments when the stress, emotion, and stakes make it nearly impossible to do it alone.In this episode, I share a candid look at what it really feels like to hit that point — including my own recent experience navigating an IEP challenge for my family. We talk about the signs that it may be time to bring in professional support and why hiring an advocate or attorney isn’t a failure — it’s a strategy.This conversation is about recognizing limits, protecting your energy, and getting the right help so you can show up for your child without burning yourself out.In this episode, I cover:The repeating “A vs. B” conversation loop that signals you’re stuckWhy feeling unheard is a communication red flagWhen missing legal or instructional expertise mattersThe hidden toll advocacy takes on your body and mental healthHow outside support can restore clarity and breathing roomWhat advocates actually change at the tableIf advocacy has taken over your thoughts, your conversations, and your nervous system, this episode is a reminder: you don’t have to carry it alone.

We’ve all hit that moment in an IEP meeting where the conversation just… stops. No agreement. No movement. Just two sides locked in place. That’s impasse — and when it happens at school, walking away isn’t really an option.In this episode, I go back to the foundations of advocacy and negotiation to talk about what to do when discussions stall and you’re stuck in that uncomfortable space between what your child needs and what the school is willing to offer. Using real-life examples, we break down practical strategies parents can use when talks feel frozen.This episode isn’t about being combative. It’s about being strategic. When school teams hold power and conversations feel circular, there are ways to reset the table without escalating conflict.In this episode, I cover:What “impasse” actually looks like in IEP negotiationsWhy walking away isn’t an option in educationThe importance of prioritizing before the meeting startsHow to reframe conversations when you’re stuck in loopsUsing interest-based negotiation to uncover the real “why”Bringing in new voices, data, and ideas to break stalematesPractical ways to move conversations forward without burning bridgesIf you’ve ever left a meeting feeling stuck, unheard, or unsure how to get negotiations moving again, this episode gives you a framework to reset the conversation and advocate with intention — not exhaustion.Warm coffee optional. Persistence required.

Okay, "bullying" may be a strong term, but we've all been there. Advocating for your child can feel overwhelming—especially when you’re being told “this is just how it is.” In this episode, in which I again take us back to the roots of The Collaborative IEP, we refocus on the advocacy and negotiation skills parents need when school teams hold the power and control the narrative. While we often focus on practice and interventions, this episode zeroes in on what to do when school staff present information as unquestionable fact—and parents are left feeling talked over, dismissed, or subtly bullied. It comes from one of my first webinars I ever presented here at The Collaborative IEP, Simple Solutions to Seven Sticky IEP Situations!!!! Using real-world examples I see daily in my advocacy and legal work, I walk through practical, accessible strategies for bringing conversations back to objectivity. From asking for data and documentation, to using the IEP’s structure strategically, to leveraging videos, research, and records requests, this episode is about reclaiming your footing at the IEP table.In this episode, I cover:The three core skills every parent advocate needsWhy power imbalances make advocacy so hardHow schools often “tell parents how it is”—and what to do about itPractical ways to bring conversations back to objectivityHow to use the IEP process strategically to support your goalsIf you’ve ever left an IEP meeting feeling confused, steamrolled, or unsure how to push back without blowing things up, this episode will help you reset, refocus, and advocate with clarity and confidence—heating pad and all.

Advocating for your child can feel overwhelming—even when you know a lot. In this episode, I come back to the roots of The Collaborative IEP and refocus on the advocacy side of special education.I revisit the three skills I believe are essential to advocating successfully for your child: understanding special education law, understanding special education practice, and having strong advocacy and negotiation skills. While we’ve spent a lot of time on practice, this episode zeroes in on the third skill—negotiation.I walk through a mediation strategy I use to avoid piecemeal decision-making and protect flexibility during negotiations. Using a real-world example, I explain why resolving issues one at a time can limit outcomes and how a more strategic, visual approach can lead to better results at the IEP table.In this episode, I cover:The three core skills every parent advocate needsWhy negotiation strategy matters in special educationHow mediation works in special education disputesA practical strategy for keeping all issues on the table during negotiationIf you’re feeling stuck, frustrated, or like you’re missing something in your advocacy, this episode will help you refocus on the skills that actually move the needle.