Honeydew Me

For a lot of us, having kids absolutely wrecks our sex lives… at least for a while. And no one really prepares you for that. In this episode, we’re joined by Rebecca Howard Eudy, PhD, LMHC, an AASECT-certified sex therapist and couples therapist, to talk about what actually happens to desire, intimacy, and connection after kids (or even just in long term relationships). We dig into exhaustion, resentment, pressure, and why so many couples assume something is wrong with them, when really they’re just navigating a huge shift. This conversation is about understanding what’s happening and figuring out how to rebuild intimacy in a way that actually works for the season you’re in. We cover: How pressure kills intimacy. What happens when sex becomes another expectation instead of a point of connection. Why resentment shows up in the bedroom. How unequal labor, emotional disconnect, and unspoken needs quietly erode desire. How to rebuild emotional and physical intimacy. Practical ways to reconnect that do not rely on forcing desire or “trying harder.” Why sex changes so much after kids. Rebecca explains how exhaustion, mental load, and identity shifts directly impact desire and arousal. The difference between low desire and low capacity. Why many parents still want sex but feel too depleted to access it. Understanding desire differences after parenthood. Why mismatched desire is common and not a sign something is wrong with your relationship. Why scheduling intimacy can actually help. How planning connection creates safety and reduces pressure instead of killing spontaneity. The importance of redefining sex after kids. Moving beyond penetration-focused sex and expanding what intimacy can look like now. How to talk about sex without blame or defensiveness. Language shifts that help couples feel like teammates again. Connect with Rebecca: BUY HER BOOK HERE! Visit her website HERE! Follow her on Instagram HERE! Listen to her podcast HERE! ⁠⁠⁠Looking to apply these tips to your REAL life? Schedule a FREE 1:1 strategy session with Cass & Em to see if coaching can support you.⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Get Honeydew Me Merch HERE!⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Join our Patreon and access exclusive content HERE! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

What if your sex life could tell you something important about your health? In this episode, we’re joined by Dr. Elliot Justin, an ER doctor of 25 years who pivoted into sexual health innovation to change the way we talk about bodies, pleasure, and well-being. We explore how erections, cardiovascular health, data-driven tools, and honest conversations can give us earlier insight into what’s happening in the body and why sexual health should never be treated as separate from overall health. We cover: Why sexual health is a health issue, not a vanity issue. Dr. Justin explains why pleasure, performance, and function are often early indicators of deeper health patterns. What erections can reveal about cardiovascular health. How nighttime erections are connected to blood flow and heart health long before other symptoms appear. Why men’s sexual health is often ignored until there’s a crisis. How stigma and silence delay diagnosis and meaningful conversations. The science behind nocturnal erections. What’s normal, what’s not, and why the body’s nighttime patterns matter. How data can change the way couples talk about sex. Why shared, objective information can reduce shame, blame, and guesswork in the bedroom. The role of technology in modern sexual wellness. How tools like FirmTech are bringing measurable insights into intimacy and performance. Why early awareness matters more than quick fixes. How prevention and understanding beat waiting for symptoms or relying on temporary solutions. Use code "DEWME" for a discount at FirmTech! ⁠⁠⁠Looking to apply these tips to your REAL life? Schedule a FREE 1:1 strategy session with Cass & Em to see if coaching can support you.⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Get Honeydew Me Merch HERE!⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Join our Patreon and access exclusive content HERE! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this week's episode we're answering one of YOUR questions with a combination of expert tips and personal experience.  The Question: "I’m 22 and in my first long-term relationship with a partner I truly love. Everything is healthy and supportive, but I’ve noticed I’ve started deferring to his routines and preferences instead of my own. I miss parts of myself, like how I used to spend my free time and make plans just for me. How do I stay true to myself while still making room for my relationship?" What We Cover in This Episode: Losing yourself in a relationship. Why this is common in early long-term relationships and how it can happen even when the partnership is healthy and loving. Staying true to yourself while partnered. Why maintaining your own identity, routines, and desires takes intention in a committed relationship. People-pleasing and resentment. How deferring to a partner’s needs and preferences can slowly lead to disconnection and frustration. Identifying what you’ve stopped prioritizing. How to recognize the hobbies, values, and personal time that have taken a backseat. Solo needs vs relationship needs. Understanding the difference between individual fulfillment and shared intimacy in a long-term relationship. How to communicate your needs. Practical language for talking to your partner about independence, boundaries, and personal time without blame. Following through with boundaries. Why awareness isn’t enough and how to actually implement change in your daily life. Rebuilding a relationship with yourself. Why solo time, self-dates, and personal routines support emotional health and relationship satisfaction. Why this improves intimacy. How staying connected to yourself strengthens attraction, communication, and long-term relationship success. ⁠Learn more about 1:1 coaching HERE!⁠⁠ ⁠⁠Get Honeydew Me Merch HERE!⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Most of us were never actually taught how to understand our own sexuality. In this episode, we’re joined by Tash Doherty, author and sexuality advocate behind Misseducated, to talk about what it really means to become shamelessly sexy. We get into unlearning bad sex education, reconnecting with desire, and why curiosity, reflection, and self-knowledge are foundational to confidence and pleasure. We Cover: Why most of us are still “miseducated” about sex. Tash breaks down the gaps in traditional sex education and how they shape shame, confusion, and silence. How shame disconnects us from desire. Why feeling awkward, guilty, or “behind” is incredibly common and not a personal failure. What it actually means to be shamelessly sexy. Moving beyond performative confidence and into self-trust, curiosity, and ownership. The role of self-reflection in sexual confidence. Why understanding your own patterns, turn-ons, and boundaries changes everything. How journaling can transform your relationship with sex. Tash shares how intentional reflection helps women access desire, clarity, and agency. Why desire changes and how to work with it. Normalizing libido shifts and learning to stay connected to pleasure across life stages. How to build a healthier relationship with your body. Tools for getting out of comparison and back into embodied experience. Creating space for pleasure without pressure. Why slowing down and listening to yourself is more effective than “trying harder.” What women actually need more of in sex education. And why access to better tools leads to better relationships, communication, and confidence. Connect With Tash: Misseducated The Intimacy Journal  These Perfectly Careless Things Website Connect with Us: ⁠⁠Looking to apply these tips to your REAL life? Schedule a FREE 1:1 strategy session with Cass & Em to see if coaching can support you.⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Get Honeydew Me Merch HERE!⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Join our Patreon and access exclusive content HERE! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

If sex in your long-term relationship feels expected, routine, or disconnected, you’re not alone. In Part 2 of our 50 best sex tips for 2026 series, we talk about desire, pressure, and how to build a more satisfying sex life that actually feels good. This episode is about when sex starts to feel like something you’re doing because you’re supposed to. Going through the motions. Having sex because it feels expected. Checking boxes. Trying to be a good partner. Forcing yourself to want it. And still wondering why it doesn’t feel good. We cover: Doing what you think you’re supposed to do. Why “good partner” sex often disconnects you from what you actually want and feel. Going through the motions. How routine, obligation, and autopilot sex quietly drains desire. Having sex because it feels expected. Why expectation creates pressure and shuts desire down. Checking boxes instead of tuning in. How tracking frequency, effort, or outcomes pulls you out of connection. Forcing yourself to want it. Why trying to manufacture desire backfires. Trying to be a good partner. How people-pleasing and self-abandonment show up in sex. Wondering why it still doesn’t feel good. Why “fine” sex can still feel empty and what actually changes that. Get your FREE Want, Will, Won't list in our Linktree HERE! Connect with Us: ⁠Looking to apply these tips to your REAL life? Schedule a FREE 1:1 strategy session with Cass & Em to see if coaching can support you.⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠Get Honeydew Me Merch HERE!⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠Join our Patreon and access exclusive content HERE! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices