Life on Pause

When Vivienne Connor was fourteen, she found a lump under her arm and told her mom she didn't think it was anything. By that fall she had a diagnosis: Stage 2 Hodgkin's Lymphoma. She did everything a cancer story is supposed to do. Three rounds of chemotherapy through the winter. A clear PET scan on March 7th. A bell on the wall of the oncology floor, her mom in the room and her dad on FaceTime. From the outside, it looked exactly like an ending. Eighteen months later, a routine checkup turned into nine months of surgeries, mixed pathology results, and a specialist consult — and it never resolved into a clear answer. There was no second bell. Vivienne was told to watch her own body for anything that shouldn't be there and, in her words, to "figure it out for myself." In this episode of Life on Pause, Vivienne shares what survivorship actually looks like when nobody hands you an ending — and what she built instead. A business fraternity at Penn State that adopted her before they ever met her. A THON shirt she designed as a high school senior, built from her family's road trips and a camera roll full of sunsets. And a marathon in April where the last six miles taught her something her medical record never could. This episode is part of our Childhood Cancer Awareness Month coverage. It is also a companion to "Put It In The Freezer," our fertility preservation episode with Vivienne and her mom Meg. Life on Pause is produced by Penn State Health and supported by Four Diamonds. New episodes monthly on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, and YouTube. Watch the full episode on YouTube Penn State Health AYA Cancer Program Learn more about Four Diamonds

When Alicia Dixon's son Dakota was six, a headache and a facial droop sent them to the ER. She read his CT results off her own phone before the doctors reached the room — and knew, with her medical background, exactly what she was looking at. It was an aggressive brain cancer, and there was no time to waste. In this episode of Life on Pause, Alicia tells Dakota's story herself — the seven-year-old "spitfire genius" he was before cancer, the eight months and three stem-cell transplants that followed, and the moment a Four Diamonds social worker told her she'd never see a bill. She shares the hardest parts too: her son telling her he was going to die before she was ready to hear it, the peace she found in his final days, and the care package he dreamed up from his hospital bed for the kids in the rooms around him — the Dakota Duffel, "and don't forget my Jesus doll." Dakota died on May 13, 2024, at seven years old. His mom won't call it losing. The movement his wish became, Dakota's Army, is now tens of thousands strong — and still sending duffels to families across the country. We're sharing this episode for National Bereaved Parents Month. It touches on the death of a child; please listen with care. And know that Alicia shared all of it so another family might feel a little less alone. Life on Pause is produced by Penn State Health and supported by Four Diamonds — which covers 100% of childhood cancer care costs insurance doesn't, so eligible families never receive a bill. New episodes monthly on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, and YouTube. Watch the full episode on YouTube Follow Dakota's Army on Facebook Learn more about Four Diamonds

When Vivienne Connor was diagnosed with Stage 2 Hodgkin's Lymphoma at fourteen years old, her family faced two conversations almost simultaneously — one about cancer treatment, and one about her future fertility. The decision had to happen fast, before chemotherapy could begin. In this episode of Life on Pause, Vivienne and her mom Meg share what it was like to navigate fertility preservation during one of the most overwhelming moments of their lives — including Christmas Day appointments, daily hormone injections before school, and a fourteen-year-old watching her own egg retrieval on a projection screen in real time. Dr. Yifei Liu, IVF Lab Director at Penn State Health, walks us through what actually happens in the lab, what the success rates look like for young cancer patients, and why a cancer diagnosis does not mean fertility preservation is out of reach. Four years later, Vivienne is a Penn State freshman and marathon runner. The eggs are still there. And the conversations are just beginning. This episode is part of our National Infertility Awareness Week coverage and AYA Cancer Awareness Month — because for adolescent and young adult cancer patients, these two realities are deeply connected. Life on Pause is produced by Penn State Health and supported by Four Diamonds. New episodes monthly on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, and YouTube. Watch the full episode on YouTube Penn State Health Fertility Preservation Program Learn more about Four Diamonds

🎥 VIDEO EPISODE NOTE: This story was made for video and includes powerful visual moments from both sides of the THON 2026 Hospital-to-THON Bridge — from patient rooms at Penn State Health Children's Hospital to the floor of the Bryce Jordan Center. Watch the full episode on YouTube for the complete experience. — — — Every year, THON happens for the kids who can't be there. This year, THON came to them. Delaney Clemens is sixteen years old. A two-sport varsity athlete — field hockey and lacrosse — she played a game on a Wednesday in March. By Friday, she was at Penn State Health Children's Hospital. Four days later, she was diagnosed with High-Risk B-Cell Leukemia. Her world, as she put it, changed in a split second. This THON Weekend, Delaney's room was connected to the Bryce Jordan Center through a live remote bridge — bringing the full THON experience directly to inpatients who couldn't attend. Line dances, the white-out pep rally, the Penn State Drum Major and Majorette, a pairing reveal, and the live number announcement — all of it, streamed to patient rooms in real time. And at the end of the weekend, when it was time to say goodbye, Delaney looked at the screen and said something that stopped the room. "See you next year." In this episode of Life on Pause, we tell Delaney's story alongside Emmett Herring — who was in that same hospital room last year during THON, and this year walked into the Bryce Jordan Center for the first time. In this episode: • The Hospital-to-THON live bridge and how it works • The Wednesday hospital visit — the Drum Major, Majorette, Penn State Bingo, and line dance teachers who came to the inpatient unit three days before THON Weekend • The pairing reveal: a THON organization meeting their Four Diamonds family through a screen • The THON 2026 number reveal — watched live from both locations • What it means to belong to a community when you can't be in the room 💙 Life on Pause is produced in partnership with Penn State Health Children's Hospital and Four Diamonds. 🎧 Subscribe on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, and wherever you listen to podcasts. 📺 Watch the full video on YouTube — search "Life on Pause." Learn more: https://www.lifeonpausepodcast.com

At twenty years old, Eliot Dean was diagnosed with acute lymphoblastic leukemia. For weeks, his world shrank to a single hospital floor he couldn't leave — a window with a good view, a lot of sunsets, and the slow, difficult work of getting through treatment. Five years later, in remission, Eliot thought the worst was behind him. Then routine blood work came back suspicious. Same markers. Same diagnosis. A different kind of fear. In this episode of Life on Pause, Eliot shares what no one tells you about facing leukemia twice — and what it means to fight it the second time, when you already know how hard it is. He talks about the stem cell transplant that saved his life, the brother who made it possible, the bell he rang on the other side, and the trip to Costa Rica he'd been putting off for too long. Eliot speaks honestly about the "not knowing" — the statistics, the survival rates, the questions he demanded answers to because he wasn't willing to be a passive patient. He talks about THON, Four Diamonds, and the full-circle moment of realizing the organization his sister fundraised for as a student became his lifeline as a patient. And he shares the philosophy he's carried out of the other side: don't wait. Don't be scared. His story isn't about one diagnosis. It's about two — and everything that changed between them. Thank you, Eliot, for sharing your story and your strength. Topics Covered: • Being diagnosed with acute lymphoblastic leukemia at age 20 • Life on a single hospital floor — confinement, coping, and small freedoms • The relapse — facing the same diagnosis five years later • The stem cell transplant and his brother Collin as the donor • Self-advocacy and demanding to understand your own treatment • THON and Four Diamonds — a full-circle community story • Ringing the bell — the second time • Life after cancer: Costa Rica, not waiting, taking it day by day • What he'd tell the version of himself who was twenty and newly diagnosed About Life on Pause: Life on Pause is a podcast for and by young adults with cancer. Produced by Penn State Health's AYA Oncology Program, each episode is rooted in honest storytelling and community connection. Our content is reviewed by medical and psychosocial experts to ensure accuracy and care. Join Our Community: 💻 Website: https://www.lifeonpausepodcast.com/ 🎧 Subscribe on Spotify & Apple Podcasts Content Warning: This episode contains discussions of cancer diagnosis, relapse, stem cell transplant, and the emotional weight of facing a life-threatening illness more than once.