The Vat Spawn watch the Goblin King polymorph the missing Ariana from a beautiful pop star into a grotesque goblin. A hundred goblins cheer him on as the transformation occurs. “Goblins is people?” Dragon Warrior queried. 

Bat Alchemist lights a joint from the demon dog’s fire breath to regain his lost health. Then he reverse engineered Warlock Roc’s listening device to play Enrique Iglesias through the tone-stone walls, causing them to gather in one area for a makeshift dance party. Turns out goblins are obsessed with Enrique Iglesias. 

Tiger Wizard takes advantage of the distracting dance party, springs through the door, and casts Nitar’s Fireball, serving a dish of fiery destruction. 

The Goblin King breathes fire from the demonic face in the center of his torso, but Tiger Wizard and Bat Alchemist move out of the way. The goblins swarm the Vat Spawn as they fight-dance to Enrique Iglesias.

Dragon Warrior sits atop the demon dog Lotto and charges into the room. Lotto breathes fire into the goblin horde as Dragon Warrior swan dives into the goblins as he casts Pognif Explosion exploding himself and a single goblin to bits… and then he reforms.

Bat Alchemist uses his soulbound weapon Clippy’s ability to hit multiple targets. In return for his services, Clippy demands to be of assistance immediately and makes Bat Alchemist do calisthenics to get better at attacking.

Tiger Wizard dances through the goblin horde to whiff hitting the Goblin King, and notices that he’s wearing a wooden mask. 

Warlock Roc attempts to sneak away, but trips on her high heels into the goblin horde. Dragon Warrior wades through the gobs to give Warlock Roc a healing potion, which brought her back to full power and made her glow pink.

The Goblin King grabs Tiger Wizard and begins polymorphing him into a goblin. Tune in next week to see how goblined up Tiger Wizard gets.

ANNOUNCEMENTS

• PAX Unplugged: December 6th through 8th in Philadelphia. Come say hi to Tiger Wizard at the Exalted Funeral booth, and play some games with Dragon Warrior every morning at the Alexandria RPG Library room.
• Dungeon Cats: Tiger Wizard’s rules-lite TTRPG where you play feline adventurers is now available at Exalted Funeral.
• THE MEGA DUNGEON MEN EP: Our new TTRPG fantasy meets hip hop album, The Mega Dungeon Men EP is now available on all streaming platforms.

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Thanks for listening to Season Three of the Epic Levels Mad Dungeon podcast, where D&D hip hop group Epic Levels alternate between “Rise of the Vat Spawn,” an actual play using Mystic Punks RPG, and Side Quests where we interview other game creators.

You can support us via Patreon for early episode releases, bonus map content, extra art, access to our discord server, and lots of other exclusive goodies.

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Mad Dungeon is hosted by Andrew Bellury, Steve Albertson, Robin Bellury and produced by Zach Cowan.

Theme song by Epic Levels and beat by Jay Domingo.

© 2024 Epic Levels. All characters in our adventures–even those based on real people–are entirely fictional.