Lesson Learned

I know I can't be the only one who struggles with meeting and making friends as an adult. Why is it so dang hard? Listen in as I go through the process of figuring out why it's more difficult to meet/make now than when we were younger.  Long story short: life. Life happens. Things change; people change. Therefore, friendships, and the context in which we meet and make friends, change with it. 

Most people would not jump at the chance to feel heartache and pain. We tend to live our lives trying to avoid unpleasant feelings. But what do we do when something unexpected happens and we are confronted with sudden loss and all the painful emotions that come with it? Do you know how to grieve? Do you know how to be a friend to someone who is grieving? Most people are uncertain of what to say or do when a loved one is hurting and struggling with their grief and unfortunately end up saying things that are not very helpful. So then, what can we do? What do we say? In these times, I've learned that it's not about me. We need simply to do less; say less. And just be there for the one who is hurting.

I only dreamed about dropping out of college, but my friend Chris actually pulled the trigger. As an Asian kid, dropping out of college is a BIG deal and even bigger deal to a 1st-gen Asian parent. But Chris stuck to his convictions and paved his own path even if it wasn’t the traditional route. He is now a very successful firefighter, podcaster, and simply one of the most hard-working people I know.

For so long I felt like there was something wrong with me. Why can't I focus? My mind is constantly racing, I'm endlessly restless, and I end up staying up at night because my brain doesn't seem to want to shut off. My whole life, I believed that I just had to try harder, be more disciplined, and learn to just concentrate in order to be a better student and a more productive individual in general. But did you know these are just a few signs of ADHD? After reading multiple articles, listening to several podcasts on ADHD, watching/listening to youtube videos, watching Ted Talks, and talking to other people with ADHD, I've gained valuable insight on just what ADHD actually is, and I am now convinced that I may have adult ADHD--and I finally feel like my life makes sense. There is nothing "wrong" with me as I had previously thought for so many years. My brain is just wired differently than the neurotypical person, and honestly, it's not such a bad thing. 

We all experience anxiety sometimes...but those with high-functioning anxiety (me, I think), and especially those with anxiety disorders, experience anxiety differently and with varying intensities and symptoms. Those with anxiety--and not just those who experience anxiety occasionally--experience symptoms of high stress and imminent danger constantly. All day. Every day. It is exhausting and taxing on our mental health, physical, and emotional health. For those with milder symptoms, deep breathing exercises, exercising in general, and stretching are ways we can help relieve some of that anxiety.