Out of margin? Whether you're navigating a new baby, a demanding job, a strained relationship, grief, or a big transition, this conversation gives you practical ways to stay grounded when life won't slow down. We share Romi's birth story and the grief that unexpectedly opened the door to peace, unpack why people "borrow" each other's nervous systems, and walk through simple, repeatable practices to regulate in real time—without perfection or spiritual jargon.
Who This Is For (and Why It Helps)
Parents and caregivers feeling stretched thin and reactive—learn how to co-regulate and repair.
Singles and married couples without kids facing career pressure, loneliness, or change—use micro-practices to steady your inner world.
Leaders, pastors, and coaches who carry others' emotions—discover how presence resets a room better than control.
Anyone in transition or grief—see why honest sorrow can become the doorway to peace rather than a detour.
You'll walk away with language for what's happening in your body, a kinder way to meet your triggers, and small steps that create real change.
What You'll Learn
How grief can make space for breakthrough (Romi's story)
The pain–fear–tension loop and how to break it
"Borrowed nervous systems": why your presence matters more than perfect words
A clarifying question that transforms reactivity: "Why does this bother me?"
Zero-margin tools: two breaths + one sentence, name the wave, orient to good, rhythm over rules, repair over perfection
Chapters & Timestamps 00:00 When life feels unmanageable (why margin matters) 03:20 Grieving what's ending and how it made room (Romi's birth) 10:10 Pain–fear–tension: what bracing does to your body 16:45 Borrowed nervous systems: presence over control 23:00 The belief beneath the reaction: "Why does this bother me?" 31:15 Micro-practices for zero-margin moments (step-by-step) 38:00 Being parented by God so we can lead from peace
Learn more, find resources, or get in touch at: www.aliveandfreeconsulting.com
To find freedom, heal, and feel powerful in your emotions, check out the Alive & Free Collective by CLICKING HERE.
To become a life coach and get started in your career helping people get free and healthy emotionally and start a business doing so, go to our training video.
EPISODE SUMMARY
Navigating the intricacies of relationships has been a journey of growth and understanding for us. Initially, the contrast between Spencer's love for stability and my craving for spontaneity seemed insurmountable. Yet, it was through embracing these differences that we discovered a deeper connection. Join us as we recount personal stories from our marriage, showcasing how embracing each other's passions enriched our lives, and why identical interests aren't a prerequisite for meaningful connections.
As we transitioned from the honeymoon phase to a more mature relationship, challenges inevitably arose. From balancing Spencer's focus on a stable future with my desire for adventure, to addressing unmet needs and differing priorities, our marriage has seen its fair share of struggles. Through open communication and mutual understanding, we've tackled issues of humor, attraction, and perceived rejection, navigating the complex journey of aligning our individual identities within our partnership. Our experiences underscore the importance of independence and self-fulfillment, allowing us to appreciate personal growth within the marriage.
Marriage, for us, has been a vehicle for personal growth rather than just fulfilling personal preferences. We've learned the value of supporting each other's desires while maintaining our independence, fostering a connected yet secure partnership. By tackling personal triggers and emotions, we emphasize the importance of character and resilience in sustaining relationships. Our episode encourages listeners to explore their own triggers and embrace a higher power to meet their needs, fostering love and connection in their relationships.
EPISODE CHAPTERS
(0:00:00) - Navigating Differences in Relationships
(0:12:55) - Navigating Challenges in Marriage
(0:20:54) - Navigating Growth and Unity in Marriage
(0:30:07) - Navigating Relationships Through Growth and Connection
(0:36:42) - Supporting Free Content Through Sharing
EPISODE CHAPTERS WITH SHORT KEY POINTS
(0:00:00) - Navigating Differences in Relationships
Relationship dynamics, embracing differences, and misconceptions about compatibility in genuine connections.
(0:12:55) - Navigating Challenges in Marriage
Evolution of a relationship from infatuation to married life, navigating differences, challenges, and struggles with identity within the marriage.
(0:20:54) - Navigating Growth and Unity in Marriage
Independence, communication, and mutual understanding are crucial for a fulfilling marriage, as discussed through personal experiences and parental triggers.
(0:30:07) - Navigating Relationships Through Growth and Connection
Embracing love and openness in relationships for personal growth, character, and resilience, relying on a higher power.
(0:36:42) - Supporting Free Content Through Sharing
Support free content by sharing on social media, join Alive and Free Collective, and new program for men.
To find freedom, heal, and feel powerful in your emotions, check out the Alive & Free Collective by CLICKING HERE.
To become a life coach and get started in your career helping people get free and healthy emotionally and start a business doing so, go to our training video to learn more.
EPISODE DESCRIPTION
Growing up, I often struggled with the idea of sharing my true self with others. Vulnerability seemed intimidating, and knowing when to open up or hold back was a constant battle. Join us as we dissect the complex nature of vulnerability in relationships, exploring the delicate balance between fostering intimacy and safeguarding our inner worlds. We acknowledge the critical role vulnerability plays in forming meaningful connections, and yet, we recognize the potential risks involved when we share too much with the wrong people.
Throughout this episode, we navigate the intricate dance of finding safe spaces and safe people to express our vulnerability. We tackle tough questions about how certain environments, like some church communities, might inadvertently stifle openness and explore the importance of cultivating supportive circles. With practical advice on identifying safe people, and emphasizing the value of having mentors or counselors, we encourage listeners to build environments that invite vulnerability.
Our conversation underscores the need for unconditional love and compassion in these spaces, while also promoting a strong relationship with God as a source of unwavering support. We also confront the challenges of forming deep connections, whether in new environments or long-distance relationships, emphasizing the significance of finding individuals with shared values. By examining our own attachment styles, we learn how to better understand and connect with others. Ultimately, we aim to empower listeners to ground themselves in God's love, allowing them to become beacons of hope and support in their communities. Join us as we embark on a journey to bring a piece of heaven to earth through authentic, vulnerable relationships.
EPISODE CHAPTERS
(0:00:00) - Navigating Vulnerability in Relationships
(0:03:45) - The Meaning of True Vulnerability
(0:16:03) - Nurturing Deep Relationships Through Vulnerability
(0:27:04) - Exploring Depth in Vulnerable Relationships
(0:36:35) - Finding God's Love in Relationships
EPISODE CHAPTERS WITH SHORT KEY POINTS
(0:00:00) - Navigating Vulnerability in Relationships
Vulnerability in relationships is complex and nuanced, essential for intimacy but must be navigated carefully.
(0:03:45) - The Meaning of True Vulnerability
Vulnerability is often misunderstood and safe spaces are needed for expressing it with unconditional love and compassion.
(0:16:03) - Nurturing Deep Relationships Through Vulnerability
Vulnerability is crucial in relationships, as personal time with God and experiencing His love through human connections are equally important.
(0:27:04) - Exploring Depth in Vulnerable Relationships
Vulnerability, attachment styles, and faith are discussed in relation to building safe and supportive communities.
(0:36:35) - Finding God's Love in Relationships
Being rooted in God's love helps us overcome relationship challenges and bring divine love to others.
To find freedom, heal, and feel powerful in your emotions, check out the Alive & Free Collective by CLICKING HERE.
To become a life coach and get started in your career helping people get free and healthy emotionally and start a business doing so, go to our training video to learn more.
EPISODE DESCRIPTION:
Discover the art of turning life's unpredictable challenges into opportunities for growth and resilience. Join us as we explore how emotional regulation can be a powerful tool for fostering healthy relationships and enhancing decision-making skills. Through intimate stories and counseling insights, we'll uncover how maintaining character amid adversity can lay the groundwork for future blessings, even in moments of grief and loss. Engage with us in a transformative journey that connects personal resilience with spiritual fulfillment.
What if you could harness the power of faith to find peace during life's storms? We unravel this potent theme by drawing inspiration from biblical figures and personal anecdotes, showing how internal strength often outshines external circumstances. Hear tales of business trials and successes, such as the journey of launching a jewelry brand, Goldie Kai, where spiritual alignment led to serendipitous opportunities. We emphasize the importance of seeking divine wisdom over worldly allure, fostering a deeper connection with spirituality to achieve genuine success
Explore the profound intersection of emotional health and faith, as we reflect on the vital role of divine wisdom in navigating life's pivots. From parenting with love and grace to embracing entrepreneurial challenges, our stories illustrate the power of surrender and trust in God. As we share insights from courses like Jim Baker's "Wealth with God," you'll witness how spiritual guidance can coincide with significant breakthroughs. This episode promises to illuminate the path to resilience, joy, and peace through a regulated mindset and unwavering faith.
EPISODE CHAPTERS
(0:00:00) - Navigating Life's Pivots and Resilience
(0:13:28) - Emotional Regulation for Healthy Relationships
(0:18:06) - Unshakeable Faith Amid Adversity
(0:21:02) - Integrating Faith and Emotional Health
(0:27:03) - Healing Shame, Embracing Love
(0:39:30) - Entrepreneurial Pivots and Divine Wisdom
(0:44:40) - Navigating Life's Challenges With Faith
EPISODE CHAPTERS WITH SHORT KEY POINTS
(0:00:00) - Navigating Life's Pivots and Resilience Resilience, character, and growth through life's pivots, finding God in hardship, and shutting down a business for purpose alignment.
(0:13:28) - Emotional Regulation for Healthy Relationships Emotional regulation impacts relationships and decision-making, and processing emotions can prevent regrettable exchanges and foster resilience.
(0:18:06) - Unshakeable Faith Amid Adversity Faith's transformative power in adversity, contrast between external challenges and internal resilience, seeking divine guidance over worldly advice.
(0:21:02) - Integrating Faith and Emotional Health Connecting with God for internal peace and growth, surrendering to Him, embracing emotions, and seeking mentorship and community support.
(0:27:03) - Healing Shame, Embracing Love Parenting complexities, secure attachment, regulating emotions, autonomy, shame, love and grace, biblical stories, God's influence, compassion and understanding.
(0:39:30) - Entrepreneurial Pivots and Divine Wisdom Entrepreneurship, personal growth, seeking divine guidance, financial breakthrough, and the power of wisdom and faith.
(0:44:40) - Navigating Life's Challenges With Faith Receiving unexpected financial blessings can solve immediate problems, but true success comes from spiritual fulfillment and purpose, not material gain.
To find freedom, heal, and feel powerful in your emotions, check out the Alive & Free Collective by CLICKING HERE
To become a life coach and get started in your career helping people get free and healthy emotionally and start a business doing so, CLICK HERE to go to our training video to learn more.
EPISODE DESCRIPTION
Feel called to lead? Have you met with people or discipled people and wondered how you could have more influence in their lives? Ever wondered if you were actually safe enough to be told people's darkest secrets?
In this episode Sammi and Spencer talk about how to create massive safety in the lives of individuals they have coached and led.
Highlighting stories from real coaching moments, Sammi and Spencer break down how they have coached their clients in their hardest moments. Please join the episode if you want to become a safer leader.
EPISODE CHAPTERS 0:00:08 - Equipping Leaders to Create Safety (44 Seconds)
0:04:06 - Emotional Healing and Discipleship Impact (118 Seconds)
0:11:07 - Navigating Wokeness in Christian Leadership (46 Seconds)
0:19:24 - Jesus's Healing Power and Forgiveness (75 Seconds)
0:22:15 - Addressing Root Causes of Behavioral Struggles (53 Seconds)
0:24:45 - Finding Support for Overcoming Addiction (81 Seconds)
0:33:45 - Transformative Healing Through Love and Safety (272 Seconds)
0:39:41 - Navigating Truth and Validation Understanding (74 Seconds)
0:50:40 - Walking the Walk (49 Seconds)
0:56:04 - Identification and Training for Leaders (70 Seconds)
EPISODE CHAPTERS WITH SHORT KEY POINTS
(00:00) Creating Safety for Effective Leadership Leadership requires balancing truth and love, creating a safe environment for transformation, and equipping believers for discipleship.
(11:07) Compassion and Reconciliation in Relationships Christian leaders navigate tension in responding to cultural trends and "woke ism" with compassion, addressing core fears and triggers in relationships.
(22:03) Healing From Shame and Transformation Internal transformation is crucial in overcoming struggles like pornography addiction, emphasizing the power of unconditional love and acceptance.
(31:54) Creating Safety Through Compassion and Reflection Transformative journey of healing through relationships, embracing leadership and life coaching, self-compassion, and creating safety for true influence.
(44:00) Coaching Ethics and AuthenticityEthical responsibilities of Christian life coaches include self-awareness, authenticity, and avoiding projecting personal beliefs onto clients.
(48:38) Fulfillment in Authentic Coaching Relationships Authenticity and vulnerability in coaching and leadership, being a son before a father, and the impact of leading from overflow.
(57:33) Life Mask and Self-Care Coaching Launch Self-care and understanding identity are important before helping others. Resources and coaching opportunities are available for those passionate about serving. Excited for future connections with listeners.