What do you do when a DNA test proves that everything you believed about your race, your ancestry, and your family history is not true, and at the same time the world becomes more dangerous for the people you have just learned you belong to?

That is the question at the center of Kara’s story. Kara grew up believing she was African-American, with a family history rooted in ancestors who had been enslaved in Texas. When she asked her father to take a DNA test so she could plan a "Finding Your Roots" style trip to Africa, the results were overwhelming and life-changing. Her test showed zero African DNA and fifty percent Ashkenazi Jewish ancestry.

Kara is the founder of Right to Know, a national nonprofit dedicated to advocating for adoptees, donor-conceived people, and NPEs who want access to their origins. Even with years of advocacy behind her, nothing prepared her for the identity shock of becoming part of a Jewish community during one of the most turbulent periods for Jewish people worldwide.

Her youngest son, Nico, shares his own perspective. He accompanied Kara through Jewish spaces, Jewish summer camp, and eventually a semester abroad in Israel. That trip became far more than cultural exploration. Nico was in Israel when Iran began launching missiles. His story includes middle-of-the-night sirens, running to bomb shelters, sleeping underground, and eventually being evacuated on a cruise ship escorted by the Israeli Navy to Cyprus.

This episode brings together personal identity, world events, and the difficult reality of building a new sense of self in a time of public hostility and fear.

What We Explore in This Episode

• How a DNA test overturned Kara’s lifelong understanding of her race and ancestry
• Why DNA surprises around race have a unique emotional impact
• How Kara’s father responded with deep love and support
• Kara’s founding of Right to Know and her commitment to identity rights
• The challenges of entering Jewish spaces during a time of rising antisemitism
• Nico’s path from temple to Jewish summer camp to a semester in Israel
• What it feels like to live with missile alerts as part of daily life
• Sleeping in bomb shelters and learning how quickly danger becomes normal
• The Navy escorted the evacuation to Cyprus and the global attention on Iran’s missile strikes
• How Israeli culture reshapes a person’s understanding of joy, resilience, and living in the moment
• The creation of new December traditions for a family with multiple layers of identity
• The music that helped both Kara and Nico stay grounded

Why This Episode Matters 

This story is unfolding during a time when antisemitism is rising, when political tensions around Israel are impossible to ignore, and when DNA tests continue to reveal hidden ancestries that launch people into unexpected communities. Kara and Nico’s story sits right at the crossroads of these issues, which is why it feels urgent, honest, and timely.

Perfect For Listeners Who Are

• Navigating a DNA surprise that shifted their identity
• Learning they have Jewish ancestry
• Feeling imposter syndrome in cultural or religious spaces
• Trying to explain DNA surprises to their children
• Interested in real-world experiences inside Israel during the Iran missile attacks
• Part of the adoption, donor-conceived, or NPE communities
• Drawn to stories where family secrets collide with global events

If this episode speaks to you, share it with someone who is working through their own identity twist.

Right to Know

Untangling Our Roots