<p>In this episode, we explore the deeper patterns that make emotionally unavailable partners feel so familiar — even when you want something different.</p><p>Rather than framing this as a personal flaw or something you’re “doing wrong,” this conversation explores the deeper emotional and relational patterns that make certain dynamics feel familiar, magnetic, or even safe on a nervous-system level.</p><p>I walk through five core reasons this dynamic tends to repeat:</p><ol><li><strong>Low self-worth:</strong> When love feels like something you need to earn, you may be drawn to people who require effort.</li><li><strong>Inconsistent early relationships:</strong> If connection was unpredictable growing up, inconsistency can feel like “home.”</li><li><strong>Hope, potential, and the saviour role:</strong> Why focusing on who someone <em>could</em> be keeps you invested long after the relationship stops feeling good.</li><li><strong>Intermittent reinforcement:</strong> How sporadic affection creates an addictive cycle that’s hard to break.</li><li><strong>Your own emotional unavailability:</strong> The surprising ways pursuing unavailable people can protect you from deeper vulnerability.</li></ol><p>This episode offers a compassionate look at why these patterns form — and what it takes to move toward relationships that feel mutual, steady, and emotionally safe.</p><p><a href="https://www.stephanierigg.com/secure-self-challenge" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferer"><strong>Register for the 28-Day Secure Self Challenge here</strong></a></p>