<p><strong>Hello and welcome to the </strong><em><strong>Say What! Podcast</strong></em><strong> — where, let’s be honest, nobody actually reads these intros anyway.</strong></p><p>This episode kicks off with a <em>Mystery Pipe</em> review from a sassy Geordie lady, who may or may not currently have a restraining order involving one very enthusiastic “hole user” — none other than Peter Beardsley. Make of that what you will.</p><p>On <em>Thoughts of the Week</em>, we take an intimate look at Big Pappa J’s sausage &amp; beans, alongside yet another baffling tale from the locker room — this time involving the mysterious <strong>Doppelgänger cock</strong>. Science still can’t explain it.</p><p>We introduce a brand-new segment — <strong>“What’s in the Shed?”</strong> — where The Notorious FA-TT shares a genuinely traumatic allotment bullying story and reveals once and for all why growing sweetcorn is a dangerous game.</p><p>Finally, we round things off with <em>Alternative TV Shows</em>, where a group of gold-toothed warriors battle it out with pliers in a brutal reimagining of <strong>“Going for Gold.”</strong> It’s as classy as it sounds.</p><p>We hope you make it past the first four minutes… but if not, we completely understand. Crime Stoppers probably does too.</p><p><strong>Love as always,</strong><br><strong>Big Pappa J &amp; The Notorious FA-TT ❤️</strong></p>