"Fine" Dining
"Fine" Dining

"Fine" Dining

Michael Ornelas

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Episodes

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Comedian Michael Ornelas dives deep into the stories behind your favorite chain restaurants like Domino's, BJ's Restaurant & Brewhouse, and Long John Silver's before determining if they are better or worse than Chili's: the most mediocre restaurant in America.

Recent Episodes

Long John Silver's: Toy Lawsuits, Abandoned by Yum!, and the Worst Restaurant Meal in America
MAR 4, 2026
Long John Silver's: Toy Lawsuits, Abandoned by Yum!, and the Worst Restaurant Meal in America
๐ŸŸ๐Ÿดโ€โ˜ ๏ธ๐ŸŸ Long John Silver's: Toy Lawsuits, Abandoned by Yum!, and the Worst Restaurant Meal in America ๐ŸŸ๐Ÿดโ€โ˜ ๏ธ๐ŸŸ This week I'm joined by my cousin Emma Danger for her fourth appearance on the show as we dive into the history of Long John Silver's. From its time sailing under the Yum! Brands flag alongside KFC and Taco Bell to its rocky financial voyages through bankruptcy, the chain has had quite the adventure. We also grapple with the heartbreaking reality that the Captain's Bell is off-limits unless the crew actually earned it, and explore how a seafood chain wound up entangled in movie tie-ins, pirate holidays, and one of the menu items crowned "Worst Restaurant Meal in America." ๐Ÿดโ€โ˜ ๏ธ From Kentucky Fried Chicken's Corporate Family to Going Solo ๐Ÿ’ธ Bankruptcy, Buyouts, and Rough Seas for the Brand ๐Ÿ”” The Captain's Bell We Desperately Wanted to Ring ๐ŸŽฌ Promotional Film Tie-Ins and the Lost in Space Toy Lawsuit ๐Ÿฆœ Talk Like a Pirate Day and the Chain's Nautical Identity ๐Ÿฝ๏ธ The Big Catch Platter Named the Worst Restaurant Meal in America ๐Ÿœ Emma Pitches a Dream Restaurant Withโ€ฆ Questionable Logistics ๐Ÿ“š A Yelper Expands the Lore of the Long John Silver's Literary Universe ๐Ÿ’ฌ COMMENT BELOW: Have you ever rung the Captain's Bell at a Long John Silver's? ๐Ÿ“ข SUPPORT THE SHOW & JOIN THE COMMUNITY: ๐ŸŽ‰ Patreon (Bonus episodes, extended Yelp segments & more): patreon.com/finediningpodcast ๐Ÿ’ฌ Discord (Food talk, memes, cursed Yelp): discord.gg/6a2YqrtWV4 ๐ŸŽฅ Watch full episodes: youtube.com/channel/UCLbraNhL6KhDPkdSWt2yiuw ๐Ÿ”— All links: linktree.com/finediningpodcast ๐ŸŽค Guest: Emma Danger Patreon Producers: Sue Ornelas & Joyce Van Patreon Subscribers: David Ornelas, Kellie Baldwin, Jeremy Horwitz, Herbert Amaya, Simone Davalos, Scott Bennett, Amy Reinhart, Josef Castaneda-Liles, & Travis Langley Free Patreon Followers: Joe Warszalek, Lauren Cummings, Grace Krainak, Keri Estes, Robert Duran, Patrick Elliott, Michelle Elmer, Dave Plummer, Nicholas Volney, Michael Gerard, Tracy Molino, Phuong Duong, Tyler Robinson, Brandon Gully, Mason Cruz, Michael Milito, Mez, Aaron Hubbard, Steff, Robert McLaughlin, Jewell Hermann, Renae Michael ๐Ÿ‘‰ NEXT WEEK: We actually eat Long John Silver's and see if the seafood shack can survive The Chili's Test.
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48 MIN
On the Border's "Guacamole Live" Is a National Treasure
FEB 25, 2026
On the Border's "Guacamole Live" Is a National Treasure
๐ŸŒฎ๐Ÿ”ฅ๐Ÿฅ‘ On the Border Review: Guacamole Glory, Taco Chips, and The Chili's Test ๐Ÿฅ‘๐Ÿ”ฅ๐ŸŒฎ We're back with Part 2 of On the Border, and this time Trent Tucker (@TheGOTSPod) and I actually sit down to eat at the former Brinker sibling to Chili's. There are highs. There are lows. There is guacamole made tableside that absolutely slaps. We also encounter a manager radiating peak "Karen energy," raid a Little Free Library mid-meal, and hear "Cable Car" by The Fray so many times it becomes psychological warfare. ๐Ÿฅ‘ Guacamole Live Is a Legitimate Triumph ๐ŸŒฎ Flautas That Do NOT Live Up to the Ornelas Family Name ๐Ÿง‚ Chips and Salsa Are Decent, But Why Are the Chips Half a Taco Shell? ๐ŸŽถ "Cable Car" by The Fray Plays an Unreasonable Number of Times ๐Ÿ“š Little Free Library Raid Yields a Parody Songbook and an Education on Spiders ๐Ÿ˜ฌ A Manager Check-In That Screams "I'd Like to Speak toโ€ฆ" ๐ŸŽ™๏ธ Trent Shares His Best Meal Ever: Ramen in Japan ๐ŸŒด His Worst Meal Ever: A Burger from Rainforest Cafe ๐Ÿ“Š On the Border Faces The Chili's Test ๐Ÿ’ฌ COMMENT BELOW: Is tableside guac enough to overcome weird taco chips? ๐Ÿ“ข SUPPORT THE SHOW & JOIN THE COMMUNITY: ๐ŸŽ‰ Patreon (Bonus episodes, extended Yelp segments & more): patreon.com/finediningpodcast ๐Ÿ’ฌ Discord (Food talk, memes, cursed Yelp): discord.gg/6a2YqrtWV4 ๐ŸŽฅ Watch full episodes: youtube.com/channel/UCLbraNhL6KhDPkdSWt2yiuw ๐Ÿ”— All links: linktree.com/finediningpodcast ๐ŸŽค Guest: Trent Tucker | IG: @TheGOTSPod Patreon Producers: Sue Ornelas & Joyce Van Patreon Subscribers: David Ornelas, Kellie Baldwin, Jeremy Horwitz, Herbert Amaya, Simone Davalos, Scott Bennett, Amy Reinhart, Josef Castaneda-Liles, & Travis Langley Free Patreon Followers: Joe Warszalek, Lauren Cummings, Grace Krainak, Keri Estes, Robert Duran, Patrick Elliott, Michelle Elmer, Dave Plummer, Nicholas Volney, Michael Gerard, Tracy Molino, Phuong Duong, Tyler Robinson, Brandon Gully, Mason Cruz, Michael Milito, Mez, Aaron Hubbard, Steff, Robert McLaughlin, Jewell Hermann, Renae Michael ๐Ÿ‘‰ NEXT WEEK: I take Emma, my second cousin once removed to Long John Silver's, and you KNOW we're gonna talk LJS history!
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57 MIN
On the Border: Mark Wahlberg, Bankruptcy, and the "Worst Mexican Chain in America"
FEB 18, 2026
On the Border: Mark Wahlberg, Bankruptcy, and the "Worst Mexican Chain in America"
๐ŸŒฎ๐Ÿ”ฅ๐Ÿน On the Border: Bankruptcy, Bottomless Calories, and Marky Marg Madness ๐Ÿน๐Ÿ”ฅ๐ŸŒฎ This week, Trent Tucker (@thegotspod) from the Geek Off the Street podcast joins me to break down the chaotic history of On the Border Mexican Grill & Cantina, a chain that once lived under the Chili's corporate umbrella at Brinker International before getting unceremoniously left behind. On the Border has had a rollercoaster run. We unpack the Mark Wahlberg-backed Marky Marg (where he didn't even show up for the toast), and celebrate the undeniable appeal of Guacamole Live prepared tableside. Plus, Trent pitches a zero-gravity ramen restaurant, and we read Yelp reviews in the style of a late-night local TV lawyer commercial. ๐ŸŒฏ Formerly a Brinker International Sibling to Chili's ๐Ÿ“‰ "Worst Mexican Chain" According to Men's Health ๐Ÿ’ธ Chapter 11 Bankruptcy and 40 Sudden Closures ๐Ÿน The Marky Marg Featuring Flecha Azul Tequila ๐Ÿ“บ "Why? Because You Can" is the Most American Slogan Ever ๐Ÿฅ‘ Guacamole Live Steals the Spotlight ๐Ÿš€ Trent's Zero-Gravity Ramen Restaurant Pitch โš–๏ธ A Yelper Who Sounds Like a Personal Injury Attorney ๐Ÿ’ฌ COMMENT BELOW: Is tableside guac enough to save a struggling chain? ๐Ÿ“ข SUPPORT THE SHOW & JOIN THE COMMUNITY: ๐ŸŽ‰ Patreon (Bonus episodes, extended Yelp segments & more): patreon.com/finediningpodcast ๐Ÿ’ฌ Discord (Food talk, memes, cursed Yelp): discord.gg/6a2YqrtWV4 ๐ŸŽฅ Watch full episodes: youtube.com/channel/UCLbraNhL6KhDPkdSWt2yiuw ๐Ÿ”— All links: linktree.com/finediningpodcast ๐ŸŽค Guest: Trent Tucker | IG: @thegotspod Patreon Producers:Sue Ornelas & Joyce Van Patreon Subscribers:David Ornelas, Kellie Baldwin, Jeremy Horwitz, Herbert Amaya, Simone Davalos, Scott Bennett, Amy Reinhart, Josef Castaneda-Liles, & Travis Langley Free Patreon Followers: Joe Warszalek, Lauren Cummings, Grace Krainak, Keri Estes, Robert Duran, Patrick Elliott, Michelle Elmer, Dave Plummer, Nicholas Volney, Michael Gerard, Tracy Molino, Phuong Duong, Tyler Robinson, Brandon Gully, Mason Cruz, Michael Milito, Mez, Aaron Hubbard, Steff, Robert McLaughlin, Jewell Hermann, Renae Michael ๐Ÿ‘‰ NEXT WEEK: We actually eat at On the Border and put it through the Chili's Test to see if it can hang with its former corporate sibling.
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36 MIN
Is Papa Murphy's Worth a 4 Hour Drive?
FEB 11, 2026
Is Papa Murphy's Worth a 4 Hour Drive?
๐Ÿ•๐Ÿ”ฅ๐Ÿ  Papa Murphy's Pizza Review: When Take 'N' Bake Fights Back ๐Ÿ ๐Ÿ”ฅ๐Ÿ• We're back with Part 2 of Papa Murphy's, and this time Peter Murphy (@peter_murphy) and I actually put the take 'n' bake concept to the test after a four-hour round-trip to experience it properly. What followed was a very kind cashier, a slightly alarming health department confession, and instructions that nearly burned my apartment down. From my first time trying olives to a variety of Crush products, it's all on the table as we see whether Papa Murphy's can survive the Chili's Test. ๐Ÿ• Reviewing the Murphy's Combo ๐Ÿ• Ultimate Pepperoni? More Like Dull-timate Pepper-NO-ni! (idk...) ๐Ÿง„ Garlic Knots Try to Steal the Spotlight ๐Ÿช Cookie Dough vs. Fully Baked Cookies ๐Ÿ”ฅ Faulty Instructions Lead to a Flaming Paper Tray ๐Ÿšจ Smoke Alarms, Panic, and the Consequences of Trust ๐Ÿง‘โ€๐Ÿณ A Cashier So Nice She Accidentally Shares Health Department Lore ๐ŸŽ™๏ธ Peter's Worst Restaurant Experience Involves a Chicken Bone Where It Should Never Be ๐Ÿฅฉ His Best Experience Includes His Grandfather's Favorite Steak Joint Actually Delivering ๐Ÿ“Š Papa Murphy's Faces the Chili's Test ๐Ÿ’ฌ COMMENT BELOW: Is take 'n' bake pizza a smart idea or a less good take on pizza? ๐Ÿ“ข SUPPORT THE SHOW & JOIN THE COMMUNITY: ๐ŸŽ‰ Patreon (Bonus episodes, extended Yelp segments & more): patreon.com/finediningpodcast ๐Ÿ’ฌ Discord (Food talk, memes, cursed Yelp): discord.gg/6a2YqrtWV4 ๐ŸŽฅ Watch full episodes: youtube.com/channel/UCLbraNhL6KhDPkdSWt2yiuw ๐Ÿ”— All links: linktree.com/finediningpodcast ๐ŸŽค Guest: Peter Murphy | IG: @peter_murphy Patreon Producers: Sue Ornelas & Joyce Van Patreon Subscribers: David Ornelas, Kellie Baldwin, Jeremy Horwitz, Herbert Amaya, Simone Davalos, Scott Bennett, Amy Reinhart, Josef Castaneda-Liles, & Travis Langley Free Patreon Followers: Joe Warszalek, Lauren Cummings, Grace Krainak, Keri Estes, Robert Duran, Patrick Elliott, Michelle Elmer, Dave Plummer, Nicholas Volney, Michael Gerard, Tracy Molino, Phuong Duong, Tyler Robinson, Brandon Gully, Mason Cruz, Michael Milito, Mez, Aaron Hubbard, Steff, Robert McLaughlin, Jewell Hermann, Renae Michael ๐Ÿ‘‰ NEXT WEEK: We dive into the history of On the Border Mexican Grill & Cantina with Trent Tucker from the Geek Off the Street podcast, as another restaurant steps up to the Chili's Test.
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61 MIN
Papa Murphy's Pizza: A Spiteful Dough Recipe, Food Stamps, and DIY
FEB 4, 2026
Papa Murphy's Pizza: A Spiteful Dough Recipe, Food Stamps, and DIY
๐Ÿ•๐Ÿ”ฅ๐Ÿ  Papa Murphy's Pizza: Take 'N' Bake, No Ovens, No Mercy ๐Ÿ ๐Ÿ”ฅ๐Ÿ• This week, comedian Peter Murphy (@peter_murphy) joins me to break down the strange, fascinating history of Papa Murphy's, the pizza chain that refuses to cook your food for you. We dig into how take 'n' bake became the brand's entire identity, why you literally cannot buy a hot pizza there, and how that decision shaped everything from employee working conditions to who can even buy the product. We also check in with the internet, because of course someone on Yelp is furious about flip-flops. ๐Ÿ• The Origins of Take 'N' Bake and the Merger That Created Papa Murphy's ๐Ÿ”ฅ Inventing a Dough That Works in a 425-Degree Home Oven ๐Ÿ“ˆ Explosive Growth Into One of America's Biggest Pizza Chains ๐ŸงŠ No Ovens, No Cooking Licenses, and a Safer, Cooler Workplace ๐Ÿงพ Why Papa Murphy's Pizzas Count as Groceries (and What That Means) ๐Ÿ• Stuffed Pizzas, "Larger Than Large" Pies, and Other Menu Swings ๐ŸŽƒ Heart-Shaped and Jack-O'-Lantern Pizzas as Annual Traditions ๐Ÿ“‰ The Mid-2010s Slump and the Challenge of Staying Relevant ๐Ÿ“ฑ Apps, Online Ordering, and the Modern Take 'N' Bake Pivot ๐Ÿง‡ The "Hub of Hacks" Includes Waffle Irons, Football Pepperonis, and Dough Experiments โญ Yelp From Strangers Includes a Reviewer Outraged by an Employee Wearing Flip-Flops ๐Ÿ’ฌ COMMENT BELOW: Does take 'n' bake pizza feel convenient or like homework? ๐Ÿ“ข SUPPORT THE SHOW & JOIN THE COMMUNITY: ๐ŸŽ‰ Patreon (Bonus episodes, extended Yelp segments & more): patreon.com/finediningpodcast ๐Ÿ’ฌ Discord (Food talk, memes, cursed Yelp): discord.gg/6a2YqrtWV4 ๐ŸŽฅ Watch full episodes: youtube.com/channel/UCLbraNhL6KhDPkdSWt2yiuw ๐Ÿ”— All links: linktree.com/finediningpodcast ๐ŸŽค Guest: Peter Murphy | IG: @peter_murphy WATCH PETER'S SPECIAL "OUT OF NOWHERE" HERE Patreon Producers: Sue Ornelas & Joyce Van Patreon Subscribers: David Ornelas, Kellie Baldwin, Jeremy Horwitz, Herbert Amaya, Simone Davalos, Scott Bennett, Amy Reinhart, Josef Castaneda-Liles, & Travis Langley Free Patreon Followers: Joe Warszalek, Lauren Cummings, Grace Krainak, Keri Estes, Robert Duran, Patrick Elliott, Michelle Elmer, Dave Plummer, Nicholas Volney, Michael Gerard, Tracy Molino, Phuong Duong, Tyler Robinson, Brandon Gully, Mason Cruz, Michael Milito, Mez, Aaron Hubbard, Steff, Robert McLaughlin, Jewell Hermann, Renae Michael ๐Ÿ‘‰ NEXT WEEK: We actually review Papa Murphy's and put take 'n' bake pizza through the Chili's Test to see how it stacks up against the ultimate casual-dining benchmark.
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50 MIN