What happens when a leader faces a heckler? In the high-stakes world of stand-up comedy, your reputation is made or broken in the seconds it takes to respond. The same is true in the boardroom.
In this special Christmas week episode from the archive, Andy Lopata revisits his interview with rising comedy star Athena Kugblenu (Mock the Week, The News Quiz) to uncover the surprising leadership lessons hidden in the comedian’s playbook. This isn't just about telling jokes; it's a masterclass in resilience, adaptability, and the art of winning over a tough room.
Athena shares her journey from a full-time project manager to a celebrated comic, revealing why the single most important skill for success isn't being funny—it's being likable. Discover how to handle difficult audiences with grace, use improvisation to your advantage, and why building a supportive network is the ultimate career hack, even in a fiercely competitive industry. These are the raw, real-world skills every leader needs to command a stage, and a team.
Key Takeaways From This Episode
<ol>
 <li>
What is the #1 skill you need to succeed as a performer that has nothing to do with being funny (and everything to do with leadership)?
</li>
 <li>
How do you handle a "heckler" when you realise they aren't trying to be malicious, but are just enjoying your performance too much?
</li>
 <li>
What is the simple two-part formula—Acknowledge &amp; Improvise—that can win over any cold or distracted corporate audience?
</li>
 <li>
Why is the best feedback you can give not "feedback" at all, but something far more powerful called "feed forward"?
</li>
 <li>
What's the hard truth about transitioning to a creative career that the "just believe in yourself" gurus never tell you?
</li>
</ol>
3 Actionable Insights
 <li>
<ol>
 <li>
Prioritize Likability Over Everything: Before people will laugh at your jokes or listen to your ideas, they have to like you. In any presentation or meeting, focus first on building genuine rapport and being approachable. Once you’re likable, your message has a much greater chance of landing.
</li>
 <li>
Acknowledge the Room, Then Improvise: When facing a tough or disengaged audience (like at a corporate awards dinner), don't ignore the situation. Acknowledge what's happening—the dress code, the food, the energy—to show you're present with them. This builds instant connection and gives you permission to improvise, which audiences reward highly.
</li>
 <li>
Give "Feed Forward," Not Just a "Sh*t Sandwich": When mentoring someone, avoid the clichéd praise-criticism-praise model. Instead, focus on encouraging potential. Rather than saying "what you did was wrong," try "what you could be doing is even better; talk more about X." This inspires growth without damaging confidence.
</li>
</ol>
</li>
SELECTED LINKS FROM THE EPISODE
Connect with Andy Lopata:<a href="https://lopata.co.uk/"> Website</a> |<a href="https://www.instagram.com/andylopata/?hl=en"> Instagram</a> |<a href="https://uk.linkedin.com/in/networkingstrategy"> LinkedIn</a> |<a href="https://twitter.com/andylopata?lang=en"> X/Twitter</a> |<a href="https://www.youtube.com/c/AndyLopata1/videos"> YouTube</a>
Connect with Athena Kugblenu:<a href="https://athenakugblenu.co.uk/"> Website</a> |<a href="https://twitter.com/athenakugblenu">Facebook</a> |<a href="https://instagram.com/athenakugblenu"> Instagram</a>
<a href="https://www.amazon.co.uk/Financial-Times-Guide-Mentoring-effective/dp/1292726687">The Financial Times Guide to Mentoring</a>
<a href="https://podcasts.apple.com/gb/podcast/laughing-matters-athena-kugblenu/id575487419?i=1000570242852">Episode 150 Featuring </a>Athena Kugblenu

<description>What happens when a leader faces a heckler? In the high-stakes world of stand-up comedy, your reputation is made or broken in the seconds it takes to respond. The same is true in the boardroom.

In this special Christmas week episode from the archive, Andy Lopata revisits his interview with rising comedy star Athena Kugblenu (Mock the Week, The News Quiz) to uncover the surprising leadership lessons hidden in the comedian’s playbook. This isn't just about telling jokes; it's a masterclass in resilience, adaptability, and the art of winning over a tough room.

Athena shares her journey from a full-time project manager to a celebrated comic, revealing why the single most important skill for success isn't being funny—it's being likable. Discover how to handle difficult audiences with grace, use improvisation to your advantage, and why building a supportive network is the ultimate career hack, even in a fiercely competitive industry. These are the raw, real-world skills every leader needs to command a stage, and a team.

Key Takeaways From This Episode


 
What is the #1 skill you need to succeed as a performer that has nothing to do with being funny (and everything to do with leadership)?



 
How do you handle a "heckler" when you realise they aren't trying to be malicious, but are just enjoying your performance too much?



 
What is the simple two-part formula—Acknowledge &amp; Improvise—that can win over any cold or distracted corporate audience?



 
Why is the best feedback you can give not "feedback" at all, but something far more powerful called "feed forward"?



 
What's the hard truth about transitioning to a creative career that the "just believe in yourself" gurus never tell you?




3 Actionable Insights

 

 
Prioritize Likability Over Everything: Before people will laugh at your jokes or listen to your ideas, they have to like you. In any presentation or meeting, focus first on building genuine rapport and being approachable. Once you’re likable, your message has a much greater chance of landing.



 
Acknowledge the Room, Then Improvise: When facing a tough or disengaged audience (like at a corporate awards dinner), don't ignore the situation. Acknowledge what's happening—the dress code, the food, the energy—to show you're present with them. This builds instant connection and gives you permission to improvise, which audiences reward highly.



 
Give "Feed Forward," Not Just a "Sh*t Sandwich": When mentoring someone, avoid the clichéd praise-criticism-praise model. Instead, focus on encouraging potential. Rather than saying "what you did was wrong," try "what you could be doing is even better; talk more about X." This inspires growth without damaging confidence.






SELECTED LINKS FROM THE EPISODE

Connect with Andy Lopata: Website | Instagram | LinkedIn | X/Twitter | YouTube

Connect with Athena Kugblenu: Website |Facebook | Instagram

The Financial Times Guide to Mentoring

Episode 150 Featuring Athena Kugblenu</description>

Connected Leadership Bytes

What happens when a leader faces a heckler? In the high-stakes world of stand-up comedy, your reputation is made or broken in the seconds it takes to respond. The same is true in the boardroom.

In this special Christmas week episode from the archive, Andy Lopata revisits his interview with rising comedy star Athena Kugblenu (Mock the Week, The News Quiz) to uncover the surprising leadership lessons hidden in the comedian’s playbook. This isn't just about telling jokes; it's a masterclass in resilience, adaptability, and the art of winning over a tough room.

Athena shares her journey from a full-time project manager to a celebrated comic, revealing why the single most important skill for success isn't being funny—it's being likable. Discover how to handle difficult audiences with grace, use improvisation to your advantage, and why building a supportive network is the ultimate career hack, even in a fiercely competitive industry. These are the raw, real-world skills every leader needs to command a stage, and a team.

Key Takeaways From This Episode


  
What is the #1 skill you need to succeed as a performer that has nothing to do with being funny (and everything to do with leadership)?



  
How do you handle a "heckler" when you realise they aren't trying to be malicious, but are just enjoying your performance too much?



  
What is the simple two-part formula—Acknowledge & Improvise—that can win over any cold or distracted corporate audience?



  
Why is the best feedback you can give not "feedback" at all, but something far more powerful called "feed forward"?



  
What's the hard truth about transitioning to a creative career that the "just believe in yourself" gurus never tell you?




3 Actionable Insights

  

  
Prioritize Likability Over Everything: Before people will laugh at your jokes or listen to your ideas, they have to like you. In any presentation or meeting, focus first on building genuine rapport and being approachable. Once you’re likable, your message has a much greater chance of landing.



  
Acknowledge the Room, Then Improvise: When facing a tough or disengaged audience (like at a corporate awards dinner), don't ignore the situation. Acknowledge what's happening—the dress code, the food, the energy—to show you're present with them. This builds instant connection and gives you permission to improvise, which audiences reward highly.



  
Give "Feed Forward," Not Just a "Sh*t Sandwich": When mentoring someone, avoid the clichéd praise-criticism-praise model. Instead, focus on encouraging potential. Rather than saying "what you did was wrong," try "what you could be doing is even better; talk more about X." This inspires growth without damaging confidence.






SELECTED LINKS FROM THE EPISODE

Connect with Andy Lopata: Website | Instagram | LinkedIn | X/Twitter | YouTube

Connect with Athena Kugblenu: Website |Facebook | Instagram

The Financial Times Guide to Mentoring

Episode 150 Featuring Athena Kugblenu

You Don't Have to Be Funny, You Have to Be Likable with Athena Kugblenu

The age of the top-down, "do as I say" leader is obsolete. We all know it, yet many organisations are still clinging to the old command and control model. Why? Because most leaders are terrified of what comes next. The fear of relinquishing control is real, and a vague "coaching culture" isn't a strong enough replacement.
In this powerful episode from the archive, Andy Lopata is joined by globally recognised leadership coach and author of The Enabling Manager, Myles Downey. Myles argues that the solution isn't to abandon control, but to transform it.
He unveils his practical and humane "Align and Enable" framework—a model that replaces outdated authority with a dynamic balance of "Will" (clarity, accountability) and "Love" (trust, nurturing). Discover how to lead, manage, and coach effectively to unlock true team engagement and high performance. This is the practical blueprint for the future of leadership you've been waiting for.
In this episode you will learn
<ol>
 <li>Why is simply creating a "coaching culture" a dangerous trap that leaves many managers feeling fearful and ineffective?</li>
 <li>What can leaders learn from the US military's "mission command" about empowering teams to make decisions without losing control?</li>
 <li>How can balancing the two essential human drives of "Love" (enabling) and "Will (accountability) transform you from a boss into a true leader?</li>
 <li>What are the three simple pillars—the Why, What, and How—that create true team alignment and unlock extraordinary performance?</li>
 <li>How are Millennials and Gen Z forcing a leadership revolution, and what happens to the leaders who refuse to adapt?</li>
</ol>
3 Actionable Insights
<ol>
 <li>
Adopt the Lead, Manage, Coach Framework: Understand that your role is multifaceted. </li>
 <li>
Build a Trust-Based Relationship First: The "Align and Enable" model only works on a foundation of trust. Before you can effectively lead, manage, or coach, you must invest time in understanding your team members. This trust is what gives you the permission to switch between the different modes of leadership.</li>
 <li>
Don't Just Delegate Tasks, Communicate the Mission: Ensure every team member understands the overarching business objective and exactly how their role contributes to it. </li>
</ol>
SELECTED LINKS FROM THE EPISODE
Connect with Andy Lopata:<a href="https://lopata.co.uk/"> Website</a> |<a href="https://www.instagram.com/andylopata/?hl=en"> Instagram</a> |<a href="https://uk.linkedin.com/in/networkingstrategy"> LinkedIn</a> |<a href="https://twitter.com/andylopata?lang=en"> X/Twitter</a> |<a href="https://www.youtube.com/c/AndyLopata1/videos"> YouTube</a>
Connect with Myles Downey:<a href="https://mylesdowney.com/myles-downey/"> Website</a> |<a href="https://uk.linkedin.com/in/mylesdowney">LinkedIn</a> |
<a href="https://www.amazon.co.uk/Financial-Times-Guide-Mentoring-effective/dp/1292726687">The Financial Times Guide to Mentoring</a>
<a href="https://podcasts.apple.com/gb/podcast/the-connected-leadership-podcast-command-and/id575487419?i=1000569469430">Episode 149 Featuring Myles Downey</a>

<description>The age of the top-down, "do as I say" leader is obsolete. We all know it, yet many organisations are still clinging to the old command and control model. Why? Because most leaders are terrified of what comes next. The fear of relinquishing control is real, and a vague "coaching culture" isn't a strong enough replacement.

In this powerful episode from the archive, Andy Lopata is joined by globally recognised leadership coach and author of The Enabling Manager, Myles Downey. Myles argues that the solution isn't to abandon control, but to transform it.

He unveils his practical and humane "Align and Enable" framework—a model that replaces outdated authority with a dynamic balance of "Will" (clarity, accountability) and "Love" (trust, nurturing). Discover how to lead, manage, and coach effectively to unlock true team engagement and high performance. This is the practical blueprint for the future of leadership you've been waiting for.

In this episode you will learn


 Why is simply creating a "coaching culture" a dangerous trap that leaves many managers feeling fearful and ineffective?

 What can leaders learn from the US military's "mission command" about empowering teams to make decisions without losing control?

 How can balancing the two essential human drives of "Love" (enabling) and "Will (accountability) transform you from a boss into a true leader?

 What are the three simple pillars—the Why, What, and How—that create true team alignment and unlock extraordinary performance?

 How are Millennials and Gen Z forcing a leadership revolution, and what happens to the leaders who refuse to adapt?


3 Actionable Insights


 
Adopt the Lead, Manage, Coach Framework: Understand that your role is multifaceted. 

 
Build a Trust-Based Relationship First: The "Align and Enable" model only works on a foundation of trust. Before you can effectively lead, manage, or coach, you must invest time in understanding your team members. This trust is what gives you the permission to switch between the different modes of leadership.

 
Don't Just Delegate Tasks, Communicate the Mission: Ensure every team member understands the overarching business objective and exactly how their role contributes to it. 


SELECTED LINKS FROM THE EPISODE

Connect with Andy Lopata: Website | Instagram | LinkedIn | X/Twitter | YouTube

Connect with Myles Downey: Website |LinkedIn |

The Financial Times Guide to Mentoring

Episode 149 Featuring Myles Downey

 </description>

The age of the top-down, "do as I say" leader is obsolete. We all know it, yet many organisations are still clinging to the old command and control model. Why? Because most leaders are terrified of what comes next. The fear of relinquishing control is real, and a vague "coaching culture" isn't a strong enough replacement.

In this powerful episode from the archive, Andy Lopata is joined by globally recognised leadership coach and author of The Enabling Manager, Myles Downey. Myles argues that the solution isn't to abandon control, but to transform it.

He unveils his practical and humane "Align and Enable" framework—a model that replaces outdated authority with a dynamic balance of "Will" (clarity, accountability) and "Love" (trust, nurturing). Discover how to lead, manage, and coach effectively to unlock true team engagement and high performance. This is the practical blueprint for the future of leadership you've been waiting for.

In this episode you will learn


  Why is simply creating a "coaching culture" a dangerous trap that leaves many managers feeling fearful and ineffective?

  What can leaders learn from the US military's "mission command" about empowering teams to make decisions without losing control?

  How can balancing the two essential human drives of "Love" (enabling) and "Will (accountability) transform you from a boss into a true leader?

  What are the three simple pillars—the Why, What, and How—that create true team alignment and unlock extraordinary performance?

  How are Millennials and Gen Z forcing a leadership revolution, and what happens to the leaders who refuse to adapt?


3 Actionable Insights


  
Adopt the Lead, Manage, Coach Framework: Understand that your role is multifaceted. 

  
Build a Trust-Based Relationship First: The "Align and Enable" model only works on a foundation of trust. Before you can effectively lead, manage, or coach, you must invest time in understanding your team members. This trust is what gives you the permission to switch between the different modes of leadership.

  
Don't Just Delegate Tasks, Communicate the Mission: Ensure every team member understands the overarching business objective and exactly how their role contributes to it. 


SELECTED LINKS FROM THE EPISODE

Connect with Andy Lopata: Website | Instagram | LinkedIn | X/Twitter | YouTube

Connect with Myles Downey: Website |LinkedIn |

The Financial Times Guide to Mentoring

Episode 149 Featuring Myles Downey

 

Is Command & Control Finally Dead? with Myles Downey

You believe your biggest competitive advantage is the quality of your work. You’re wrong. In today’s fast-paced world, your customers have
quietly started to care about something else far more.
In this sharp and eye-opening episode from the archive, Andy Lopata revisits his conversation with customer experience expert David Avrin, who drops a bombshell: for the first time in history, convenience has
officially supplanted quality as the primary reason customers choose you—or leave you.
This isn't just about faster delivery. It's a deep dive into the hidden points of friction—the frustrating websites, the chatbot dead-ends, the rigid policies—that are silently driving your best customers to your competitors.
David provides a masterclass on how to stop frustrating your audience and start being ridiculously easy to do business with. This episode is an urgent wake-up call for any leader who thinks "good enough" is still good enough.
Key Takeaways 
<ol>
 <li>What is the crucial difference between Customer Service and Customer Experience (and why does getting it wrong make your relationships irrelevant)?</li>
 <li>Why do customers now willingly pay more for the exact same item just to get it one day sooner, even when they don't need it?</li>
 <li>What is the “voicemail of the internet” that 86% of your potential customers refuse to use (and is it on your website right now)?</li>
 <li>What is the magic six-word phrase your team can use to turn a frustrating policy-driven "no" into a moment of customer loyalty?</li>
 <li>How are your automated emails and "please take our survey" requests secretly pushing your most loyal customers away for good?</li>
</ol>
Tune in to learn more and gain more insights from this episode of the Connected Leadership Bytes
Actionable Insights
<ol>
 <li>
Become Ridiculously Easy to Do Business With: Conduct a "friction audit" of your customer's journey. Map every step from initial contact to final follow-up and identify every delay, complicated form, or frustrating process. Challenge your team to cut at least four unnecessary steps this month.</li>
 <li>
Digitise the Process, Personalise the Person: Use automation for routine, one-way communications like billing or newsletters. However, ensure every automated system has a clear, easy-to-find "off-ramp" to a real human. Never automate personal follow-ups where a human touch is expected.</li>
 <li>
Empower Your Team to Say "Yes": Stop neutering your employees with rigid policies. Train them on what a good decision looks like within your business model and give them the authority to be flexible. Equip them with the phrase, "Let me tell you what I can do," to solve problems on the spot.</li>
</ol>
SELECTED LINKS FROM THE EPISODE
Connect with Andy Lopata:<a href="https://lopata.co.uk/"> Website</a> |<a href="https://www.instagram.com/andylopata/?hl=en"> Instagram</a> |<a href="https://uk.linkedin.com/in/networkingstrategy"> LinkedIn</a> |<a href="https://twitter.com/andylopata?lang=en"> X/Twitter</a> |<a href="https://www.youtube.com/c/AndyLopata1/videos"> YouTube</a>
Connect with David Avrin:<a href="https://www.davidavrin.com/"> Website</a> |<a href="https://www.linkedin.com/in/davidavrin">LinkedIn</a> |
<a href="https://www.amazon.co.uk/Financial-Times-Guide-Mentoring-effective/dp/1292726687">The Financial Times Guide to Mentoring</a>
<a href="https://podcasts.apple.com/gb/podcast/building-great-customer-relationships-with-david-avrin/id575487419?i=1000568675613">Episode 148 Featuring David Avrin</a>

<description>You believe your biggest competitive advantage is the quality of your work. You’re wrong. In today’s fast-paced world, your customers have
quietly started to care about something else far more.

In this sharp and eye-opening episode from the archive, Andy Lopata revisits his conversation with customer experience expert David Avrin, who drops a bombshell: for the first time in history, convenience has
officially supplanted quality as the primary reason customers choose you—or leave you.

This isn't just about faster delivery. It's a deep dive into the hidden points of friction—the frustrating websites, the chatbot dead-ends, the rigid policies—that are silently driving your best customers to your competitors.
David provides a masterclass on how to stop frustrating your audience and start being ridiculously easy to do business with. This episode is an urgent wake-up call for any leader who thinks "good enough" is still good enough.

Key Takeaways 


 What is the crucial difference between Customer Service and Customer Experience (and why does getting it wrong make your relationships irrelevant)?

 Why do customers now willingly pay more for the exact same item just to get it one day sooner, even when they don't need it?

 What is the “voicemail of the internet” that 86% of your potential customers refuse to use (and is it on your website right now)?

 What is the magic six-word phrase your team can use to turn a frustrating policy-driven "no" into a moment of customer loyalty?

 How are your automated emails and "please take our survey" requests secretly pushing your most loyal customers away for good?


Tune in to learn more and gain more insights from this episode of the Connected Leadership Bytes

Actionable Insights


 
Become Ridiculously Easy to Do Business With: Conduct a "friction audit" of your customer's journey. Map every step from initial contact to final follow-up and identify every delay, complicated form, or frustrating process. Challenge your team to cut at least four unnecessary steps this month.

 
Digitise the Process, Personalise the Person: Use automation for routine, one-way communications like billing or newsletters. However, ensure every automated system has a clear, easy-to-find "off-ramp" to a real human. Never automate personal follow-ups where a human touch is expected.

 
Empower Your Team to Say "Yes": Stop neutering your employees with rigid policies. Train them on what a good decision looks like within your business model and give them the authority to be flexible. Equip them with the phrase, "Let me tell you what I can do," to solve problems on the spot.


SELECTED LINKS FROM THE EPISODE

Connect with Andy Lopata: Website | Instagram | LinkedIn | X/Twitter | YouTube

Connect with David Avrin: Website |LinkedIn |

The Financial Times Guide to Mentoring

Episode 148 Featuring David Avrin

 </description>

You believe your biggest competitive advantage is the quality of your work. You’re wrong. In today’s fast-paced world, your customers have
quietly started to care about something else far more.

In this sharp and eye-opening episode from the archive, Andy Lopata revisits his conversation with customer experience expert David Avrin, who drops a bombshell: for the first time in history, convenience has
officially supplanted quality as the primary reason customers choose you—or leave you.

This isn't just about faster delivery. It's a deep dive into the hidden points of friction—the frustrating websites, the chatbot dead-ends, the rigid policies—that are silently driving your best customers to your competitors.
David provides a masterclass on how to stop frustrating your audience and start being ridiculously easy to do business with. This episode is an urgent wake-up call for any leader who thinks "good enough" is still good enough.

Key Takeaways 


  What is the crucial difference between Customer Service and Customer Experience (and why does getting it wrong make your relationships irrelevant)?

  Why do customers now willingly pay more for the exact same item just to get it one day sooner, even when they don't need it?

  What is the “voicemail of the internet” that 86% of your potential customers refuse to use (and is it on your website right now)?

  What is the magic six-word phrase your team can use to turn a frustrating policy-driven "no" into a moment of customer loyalty?

  How are your automated emails and "please take our survey" requests secretly pushing your most loyal customers away for good?


Tune in to learn more and gain more insights from this episode of the Connected Leadership Bytes

Actionable Insights


  
Become Ridiculously Easy to Do Business With: Conduct a "friction audit" of your customer's journey. Map every step from initial contact to final follow-up and identify every delay, complicated form, or frustrating process. Challenge your team to cut at least four unnecessary steps this month.

  
Digitise the Process, Personalise the Person: Use automation for routine, one-way communications like billing or newsletters. However, ensure every automated system has a clear, easy-to-find "off-ramp" to a real human. Never automate personal follow-ups where a human touch is expected.

  
Empower Your Team to Say "Yes": Stop neutering your employees with rigid policies. Train them on what a good decision looks like within your business model and give them the authority to be flexible. Equip them with the phrase, "Let me tell you what I can do," to solve problems on the spot.


SELECTED LINKS FROM THE EPISODE

Connect with Andy Lopata: Website | Instagram | LinkedIn | X/Twitter | YouTube

Connect with David Avrin: Website |LinkedIn |

The Financial Times Guide to Mentoring

Episode 148 Featuring David Avrin

 

The Art of Being Ridiculously Easy to Do Business featuring David Avrin

What does masculinity mean in today's workplace? 
This episode moves beyond outdated stereotypes to explore the powerful dynamic of masculine and feminine energies—and why a healthy balance is crucial for modern leadership.
Andy Lopata is joined by Stephen Whitton, a leader from the UK
automotive industry, and DEI practitioner Moe Carrick. Together, they redefine masculine energy as the drive for goals and competition, and feminine energy as the capacity for compassion, collaboration, and empathy. The conversation reveals how workplaces have historically over-promoted dysfunctional masculine traits like "rugged individualism" while suppressing essential feminine ones, to the detriment of all genders.
Andy, Stephen and Moe discuss the paradox faced by men and women:
women who display masculine traits are often labeled "aggressive,"
while men who show vulnerability are seen as "weak." The guests provide actionable advice for leaders, from fostering curiosity and psychological safety to systemising "connective labour"—the essential work of making employees feel seen and valued.
This episode isn't about demonising masculinity. It’s a powerful call to celebrate its positive aspects—like drive and courage—while integrating
them with the feminine energies we all possess, allowing everyone to show up as their authentic, whole selves.
What We Discussed in the Episode:
<ol>
 <li>
Energy, Not Gender: Reframing the debate from a binary of men and women to a spectrum of "masculine" (driven, competitive) and "feminine" (collaborative, empathetic) energies that exist in everyone.</li>
 <li>
The Cost of Imbalance: Workplaces have long rewarded dysfunctional masculine traits while penalising feminine ones, leading to burnout, a lack of authenticity, and poor mental well-being for all employees.</li>
 <li>
The Vulnerability Paradox: Vulnerability is a key feminine trait essential for modern leadership, yet men are often punished for showing it, while women are penalised for displaying traditionally "strong" masculine traits.</li>
 <li>
The Leadership Shift: Leaders must actively cultivate environments of curiosity and acceptance.</li>
 <li>
Celebrating Healthy Masculinity: The goal isn't to eliminate masculine energy but to integrate it. Drive, ambition, and strength are vital, but become truly powerful when balanced with compassion and collaboration.</li>
</ol>
SELECTED LINKS FROM THE EPISODE
Connect with Andy Lopata:<a href="https://lopata.co.uk/"> Website</a> |<a href="https://www.instagram.com/andylopata/?hl=en"> Instagram</a> |<a href="https://uk.linkedin.com/in/networkingstrategy"> LinkedIn</a> |<a href="https://twitter.com/andylopata?lang=en"> X/Twitter</a> |<a href="https://www.youtube.com/c/AndyLopata1/videos"> YouTube</a>
Connect with Moe Carrick:<a href="https://moementum.com/about/"> Website</a> |<a href="https://www.linkedin.com/in/moecarrick">LinkedIn</a> |
Connect with Stephen Whitton:<a href="https://www.stephenjwhitton.com/"> Website</a>
<a href="https://www.allisonpugh.com/the-last-human-job">The Last Human Job by Allison Pugh</a>
<a href="https://www.amazon.com/Athena-Doctrine-Women-Think-Future/dp/111845295X">The Athena Doctrine by John Gerzema and Michael
D'Antonio </a>
<a href="https://www.amazon.co.uk/Financial-Times-Guide-Mentoring-effective/dp/1292726687">The Financial Times Guide to Mentoring</a>

<description>What does masculinity mean in today's workplace? 

This episode moves beyond outdated stereotypes to explore the powerful dynamic of masculine and feminine energies—and why a healthy balance is crucial for modern leadership.

Andy Lopata is joined by Stephen Whitton, a leader from the UK
automotive industry, and DEI practitioner Moe Carrick. Together, they redefine masculine energy as the drive for goals and competition, and feminine energy as the capacity for compassion, collaboration, and empathy. The conversation reveals how workplaces have historically over-promoted dysfunctional masculine traits like "rugged individualism" while suppressing essential feminine ones, to the detriment of all genders.

Andy, Stephen and Moe discuss the paradox faced by men and women:
women who display masculine traits are often labeled "aggressive,"
while men who show vulnerability are seen as "weak." The guests provide actionable advice for leaders, from fostering curiosity and psychological safety to systemising "connective labour"—the essential work of making employees feel seen and valued.

This episode isn't about demonising masculinity. It’s a powerful call to celebrate its positive aspects—like drive and courage—while integrating
them with the feminine energies we all possess, allowing everyone to show up as their authentic, whole selves.

What We Discussed in the Episode:


 
Energy, Not Gender: Reframing the debate from a binary of men and women to a spectrum of "masculine" (driven, competitive) and "feminine" (collaborative, empathetic) energies that exist in everyone.

 
The Cost of Imbalance: Workplaces have long rewarded dysfunctional masculine traits while penalising feminine ones, leading to burnout, a lack of authenticity, and poor mental well-being for all employees.

 
The Vulnerability Paradox: Vulnerability is a key feminine trait essential for modern leadership, yet men are often punished for showing it, while women are penalised for displaying traditionally "strong" masculine traits.

 
The Leadership Shift: Leaders must actively cultivate environments of curiosity and acceptance.

 
Celebrating Healthy Masculinity: The goal isn't to eliminate masculine energy but to integrate it. Drive, ambition, and strength are vital, but become truly powerful when balanced with compassion and collaboration.


SELECTED LINKS FROM THE EPISODE

Connect with Andy Lopata: Website | Instagram | LinkedIn | X/Twitter | YouTube

Connect with Moe Carrick: Website |LinkedIn |

Connect with Stephen Whitton: Website

The Last Human Job by Allison Pugh

The Athena Doctrine by John Gerzema and Michael
D'Antonio 

The Financial Times Guide to Mentoring</description>

The Connected Leadership Podcast

What does masculinity mean in today's workplace? 

This episode moves beyond outdated stereotypes to explore the powerful dynamic of masculine and feminine energies—and why a healthy balance is crucial for modern leadership.

Andy Lopata is joined by Stephen Whitton, a leader from the UK
automotive industry, and DEI practitioner Moe Carrick. Together, they redefine masculine energy as the drive for goals and competition, and feminine energy as the capacity for compassion, collaboration, and empathy. The conversation reveals how workplaces have historically over-promoted dysfunctional masculine traits like "rugged individualism" while suppressing essential feminine ones, to the detriment of all genders.

Andy, Stephen and Moe discuss the paradox faced by men and women:
women who display masculine traits are often labeled "aggressive,"
while men who show vulnerability are seen as "weak." The guests provide actionable advice for leaders, from fostering curiosity and psychological safety to systemising "connective labour"—the essential work of making employees feel seen and valued.

This episode isn't about demonising masculinity. It’s a powerful call to celebrate its positive aspects—like drive and courage—while integrating
them with the feminine energies we all possess, allowing everyone to show up as their authentic, whole selves.

What We Discussed in the Episode:


  
Energy, Not Gender: Reframing the debate from a binary of men and women to a spectrum of "masculine" (driven, competitive) and "feminine" (collaborative, empathetic) energies that exist in everyone.

  
The Cost of Imbalance: Workplaces have long rewarded dysfunctional masculine traits while penalising feminine ones, leading to burnout, a lack of authenticity, and poor mental well-being for all employees.

  
The Vulnerability Paradox: Vulnerability is a key feminine trait essential for modern leadership, yet men are often punished for showing it, while women are penalised for displaying traditionally "strong" masculine traits.

  
The Leadership Shift: Leaders must actively cultivate environments of curiosity and acceptance.

  
Celebrating Healthy Masculinity: The goal isn't to eliminate masculine energy but to integrate it. Drive, ambition, and strength are vital, but become truly powerful when balanced with compassion and collaboration.


SELECTED LINKS FROM THE EPISODE

Connect with Andy Lopata: Website | Instagram | LinkedIn | X/Twitter | YouTube

Connect with Moe Carrick: Website |LinkedIn |

Connect with Stephen Whitton: Website

The Last Human Job by Allison Pugh

The Athena Doctrine by John Gerzema and Michael
D'Antonio 

The Financial Times Guide to Mentoring

Why 'Man Up' is Bad for Business with Stephen Whitton and Moe Carrick

Are you the best-kept secret in your organisation? You work hard, you deliver results, but when it comes to promotions and opportunities, you're
consistently overlooked. The hard truth is: in today's crowded world, just
doing a good job is no longer enough to get ahead.
In this episode from the archive, Andy Lopata revisits a powerful
conversation with brand identity expert Jane Bayler, a veteran of the
high-stakes world of advertising. Jane reveals why being "nice" might be the very thing holding you back and how the most successful leaders learn to stand out for their difference—not just their performance.
This isn't about being the loudest person in the room. It’s a masterclass in strategic communication, personal branding, and building a reputation that makes you indispensable. Discover how to command attention, earn recognition, and finally become the go-to authority that others seek out.
Stop being a follower and start leading the pack.
Key Takeaways From This Episode
<ol>
 <li>What is the "PIE" formula, and why does it prove that your actual job performance only accounts for 10% of your career progression?</li>
 <li>Why is being a "people pleaser" the fastest way to become vanilla, bland, and ultimately invisible in your career?</li>
 <li>How can you take credit for your ideas when someone else tries to claim them in a meeting, without being seen as arrogant or confrontational?</li>
 <li>Is it possible to build powerful relationships if you skip the after-work drinks? (And what can a bonsai tree teach you about networking?)</li>
</ol>
Actionable Insights
<ol>
 <li>
Stop Being a Generalist: Get known for being exceptional at one specific thing. Instead of presenting a confusing "basket" of all your skills, focus on a niche. This makes you the undeniable expert and the first person people think of for that specific challenge, opening the door for you to reveal your other talents later.</li>
 <li>
Dare to Polarise (Respectfully): Stop telling people what you think they want to hear. Form a strong, well-reasoned opinion on a topic relevant to your field and be prepared to stand by it. People trust and remember those who stand for something, even if they don't always agree.</li>
 <li>
Replace the Pint with a Personal Touch: Instead of relying on generic after-work drinks to build relationships, find a thoughtful, personalised way to show value. Share a book you know they'd love, send a relevant article, or give a small, meaningful gift. These gestures create a far more memorable and lasting connection than a hangover.</li>
</ol>
SELECTED LINKS FROM THE EPISODE
Connect with Andy Lopata:<a href="https://lopata.co.uk/"> Website</a> |<a href="https://www.instagram.com/andylopata/?hl=en"> Instagram</a> |<a href="https://uk.linkedin.com/in/networkingstrategy"> LinkedIn</a> |<a href="https://twitter.com/andylopata?lang=en"> X/Twitter</a>
<a href="https://www.youtube.com/c/AndyLopata1/videos">YouTube</a>
Connect with Jane Bayler:<a href="https://janebayler.com/"> Website</a> |<a href="https://www.youtube.com/@janebayler">YouTube </a>|
<a href="https://www.amazon.co.uk/Financial-Times-Guide-Mentoring-effective/dp/1292726687">The Financial Times Guide to Mentoring</a>
<a href="https://podcasts.apple.com/gb/podcast/how-to-be-the-go-to-person-in-your-organisation-or/id575487419?i=1000567777910">Episode 147 Featuring Andy Woodfield and Jane Bayler</a>

<description>Are you the best-kept secret in your organisation? You work hard, you deliver results, but when it comes to promotions and opportunities, you're
consistently overlooked. The hard truth is: in today's crowded world, just
doing a good job is no longer enough to get ahead.

In this episode from the archive, Andy Lopata revisits a powerful
conversation with brand identity expert Jane Bayler, a veteran of the
high-stakes world of advertising. Jane reveals why being "nice" might be the very thing holding you back and how the most successful leaders learn to stand out for their difference—not just their performance.

This isn't about being the loudest person in the room. It’s a masterclass in strategic communication, personal branding, and building a reputation that makes you indispensable. Discover how to command attention, earn recognition, and finally become the go-to authority that others seek out.
Stop being a follower and start leading the pack.

Key Takeaways From This Episode


 What is the "PIE" formula, and why does it prove that your actual job performance only accounts for 10% of your career progression?

 Why is being a "people pleaser" the fastest way to become vanilla, bland, and ultimately invisible in your career?

 How can you take credit for your ideas when someone else tries to claim them in a meeting, without being seen as arrogant or confrontational?

 Is it possible to build powerful relationships if you skip the after-work drinks? (And what can a bonsai tree teach you about networking?)


Actionable Insights


 
Stop Being a Generalist: Get known for being exceptional at one specific thing. Instead of presenting a confusing "basket" of all your skills, focus on a niche. This makes you the undeniable expert and the first person people think of for that specific challenge, opening the door for you to reveal your other talents later.

 
Dare to Polarise (Respectfully): Stop telling people what you think they want to hear. Form a strong, well-reasoned opinion on a topic relevant to your field and be prepared to stand by it. People trust and remember those who stand for something, even if they don't always agree.

 
Replace the Pint with a Personal Touch: Instead of relying on generic after-work drinks to build relationships, find a thoughtful, personalised way to show value. Share a book you know they'd love, send a relevant article, or give a small, meaningful gift. These gestures create a far more memorable and lasting connection than a hangover.


SELECTED LINKS FROM THE EPISODE

Connect with Andy Lopata: Website | Instagram | LinkedIn | X/Twitter

YouTube

Connect with Jane Bayler: Website |YouTube |

The Financial Times Guide to Mentoring

Episode 147 Featuring Andy Woodfield and Jane Bayler

 </description>

Are you the best-kept secret in your organisation? You work hard, you deliver results, but when it comes to promotions and opportunities, you're
consistently overlooked. The hard truth is: in today's crowded world, just
doing a good job is no longer enough to get ahead.

In this episode from the archive, Andy Lopata revisits a powerful
conversation with brand identity expert Jane Bayler, a veteran of the
high-stakes world of advertising. Jane reveals why being "nice" might be the very thing holding you back and how the most successful leaders learn to stand out for their difference—not just their performance.

This isn't about being the loudest person in the room. It’s a masterclass in strategic communication, personal branding, and building a reputation that makes you indispensable. Discover how to command attention, earn recognition, and finally become the go-to authority that others seek out.
Stop being a follower and start leading the pack.

Key Takeaways From This Episode


  What is the "PIE" formula, and why does it prove that your actual job performance only accounts for 10% of your career progression?

  Why is being a "people pleaser" the fastest way to become vanilla, bland, and ultimately invisible in your career?

  How can you take credit for your ideas when someone else tries to claim them in a meeting, without being seen as arrogant or confrontational?

  Is it possible to build powerful relationships if you skip the after-work drinks? (And what can a bonsai tree teach you about networking?)


Actionable Insights


  
Stop Being a Generalist: Get known for being exceptional at one specific thing. Instead of presenting a confusing "basket" of all your skills, focus on a niche. This makes you the undeniable expert and the first person people think of for that specific challenge, opening the door for you to reveal your other talents later.

  
Dare to Polarise (Respectfully): Stop telling people what you think they want to hear. Form a strong, well-reasoned opinion on a topic relevant to your field and be prepared to stand by it. People trust and remember those who stand for something, even if they don't always agree.

  
Replace the Pint with a Personal Touch: Instead of relying on generic after-work drinks to build relationships, find a thoughtful, personalised way to show value. Share a book you know they'd love, send a relevant article, or give a small, meaningful gift. These gestures create a far more memorable and lasting connection than a hangover.


SELECTED LINKS FROM THE EPISODE

Connect with Andy Lopata: Website | Instagram | LinkedIn | X/Twitter

YouTube

Connect with Jane Bayler: Website |YouTube |

The Financial Times Guide to Mentoring

Episode 147 Featuring Andy Woodfield and Jane Bayler

 

How to Become the Go-To Person in Your Industry with Jane Bayler

Speaker and author on professional relationships, Andy Lopata, explores great connections with experts and high achievers worldwide.

The Connected Leadership Podcast

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