A Productive Conversation

This episode is brought to you by Your Clockwise Week—a personalized weekly structure built around your actual life, not an ideal one. If your week feels full but not fitting, you can learn more at mikevardy.com/yourclockwiseweek.Most of us aren’t burned out because we’re doing too much. We’re burned out because we’re doing too much of the wrong things — on autopilot, running inherited scripts, and mistaking busyness for meaning. The distinction between a routine and a ritual sounds small. It isn’t. One checks a box. The other changes who you are.Erin Coupe spent 25 years in the corporate world before she recognized that her carefully structured life had become a kind of comfortable numbness. Her book, I Can Fit That In: How Rituals Transform Your Life, begins with a provocation right on the cover — the word “routines” is crossed out and replaced with “rituals.” That single strikethrough tells you everything about what this conversation is about. We dig into why rituals and routines are not the same thing, how autopilot living quietly erodes the quality of your days, and what it actually means to steward your energy rather than manage your time.Six Discussion PointsRituals vs. routines is not a semantic debate: Routines are repetitious rhythms you follow; rituals are repetitious rhythms you choose, because you know they’ll give something back to you. That distinction changes how you relate to your own schedule.Autopilot living is often comfortable enough to go undetected: The threshold between comfort and complacency is razor-thin, and Erin traces her own awakening to the moment she realized she wasn’t unhappy, she was simply numb.Inherited scripts are the hidden architecture of a life unlived: The beliefs instilled by family systems, school, and corporate culture don’t expire on their own; they require deliberate questioning before they’ll release their grip.Energy stewardship, not time management, is the real leverage point: Asking “do I have time for this?” keeps you trapped; asking “is this worth fitting in?” puts intention back in the driver’s seat.Intentional pauses are not passive — they are productive: Silence and stillness feel counterintuitive to high performers, but they are precisely where self-awareness gets built and better decisions get made.The luna moth is more than a book cover image: It carries a message: the caterpillar’s insatiable appetite mirrors our culture of endless striving, and the moth’s transformation is an invitation to live fully now, not at 65.Three Connection PointsErin’s websiteErin's bookErin's podcastRituals don’t require more time. They require more intention. What Erin Coupe is pointing at — and what this conversation keeps circling back to — is that the quality of your life is shaped less by your calendar and more by your relationship with yourself inside that calendar. The pause isn’t wasted time. It’s where the transformation starts. If this episode landed for you, spend some time with the question Erin puts front and center: not “do I have time for this?” but “is it worth fitting in?”If this episode resonated, I’m exploring ideas like these more deeply in my upcoming book, Productiveness. You can follow along as it takes shape at mikevardy.com/productiveness.

This episode is brought to you by Your Clockwise Week—a personalized weekly structure built around your actual life, not an ideal one. If your week feels full but not fitting, you can learn more at mikevardy.com/yourclockwiseweek.We spend a lot of time trying to fix things—our schedules, our systems, our lives. But what if that instinct, that constant push to optimize, is actually pulling us away from something more essential?In this PM Talks episode, Patrick Rhone and I explore what it means to be human in a world that increasingly treats us like machines. From travel and perspective to curiosity, ego, and even the power of doing nothing, this conversation leans into something deeper than productivity—it leans into presence.Six Discussion Points The instinct to “fix” everything can distance us from our humanity  Travel expands perspective by shifting us from transactional thinking to relational awareness  Much of what feels urgent today will be forgotten—humanness lives beyond immediacy  Curiosity is a distinctly human force that leads to better questions, not just better answers  Not every problem requires intervention—sometimes the most human response is restraint  Letting go of the need to be right (or have the last word) is a quiet but powerful act of maturityThree Connection PointsProductivenessYour Human-Size LifeShifting Vocabulary: How Changing Our Words Changes Our Work (ft. APC Episode 637 w/ Erik Fisher)If there’s a thread running through this conversation, it’s this: being human isn’t about doing more—it’s about knowing when to step back. When we loosen our grip on control, we create space for curiosity, perspective, and even wonder. And in that space, we don’t just get more done—we begin to understand what’s worth doing at all.If this episode resonated, I’m exploring ideas like these more deeply in my upcoming book, Productiveness. You can follow along as it takes shape at mikevardy.com/productiveness.

This episode is brought to you by Your Clockwise Week—a personalized weekly structure built around your actual life, not an ideal one. If your week feels full but not fitting, you can learn more at mikevardy.com/yourclockwiseweek.Most of us have been taught that trying is virtuous — that saying "I'll try" signals good intentions and a willingness to show up. But what if trying is actually a way of opting out? What if it's the most socially acceptable excuse we've built into our language — a built-in escape hatch dressed up as effort? That's the question that sits at the center of this conversation, and I haven't been able to stop thinking about it since we recorded.Carla Ondrasik spent twenty years in the competitive world of music publishing — a world where trying, in her words, means dying. She's worked with artists at the highest levels of the industry, and she's spent the last two decades studying the psychology and neuroscience behind why we say we'll try and what it actually costs us. Her book, Stop Trying: The Life Transforming Power of Trying Less and Doing More, is one of those rare reads that reframes something so ordinary and so deeply ingrained that you can't un-see it once it's been named. I know, because she caught me using the word in the middle of our conversation — while talking about her book. That's how deep this goes.Six Discussion PointsTrying is a mental activity, not a physical one. Carla makes a simple but devastating distinction: doing is a strong, determined action; trying is the loop you run in your head while the thing stays undone. The "try test" she walks through in the episode makes this viscerally clear in about thirty seconds.We use "try" to avoid accountability — and to avoid saying no. The word opens a door for excuses and blame before anything has even been attempted. Carla unpacks how trying functions as a social shield, letting us appear committed while quietly reserving the right to bail.Talking about what you're trying to do tricks your brain into feeling like you're doing it. The dopamine, serotonin, and adrenaline hits from announcing your intentions are real — and they're why so many people are still "trying to write a book" five years later. Talking about it is stealing the reward your brain should only get from finishing it.Saying "no" clearly is kinder than saying "I'll try." People pleasing drives a huge portion of our try behavior, and it's one of the most corrosive patterns Carla covers. An honest no respects everyone's time and attention — including your own. The other person stops saving you a seat. You stop dreading the follow-up.Silence protects the doing. Carla wrote her entire book without telling most people. The reason is strategic, not secretive: outside opinions — even well-meaning ones — introduce doubt, friction, and the need to justify the work before it's done. Protecting your goals with silence is a way of keeping all the energy pointed in one direction.A no-try life starts small. Awareness comes first, then one small completion — the junk drawer, the bag of clothes you meant to donate. The neurochemical reward from finishing even a tiny thing creates the momentum to do the next one. This is how the pattern breaks.Three Connection PointsCarla's book and resources: stop-trying.com — including where to find the book in print, digital, and audio formats.Carla on Instagram: @carlaondrasik — she posts daily reminders and real-world examples of the try/do distinction.Related reading on intentional action: Stop Doing Productive and Start Being Productive — if the distinction between trying and doing resonates, the idea of moving from doing productive to being productive goes even deeper here.The shift Carla is describing isn't just semantic — it's a structural change in how you relate to your own intentions. When you stop using "try" as a buffer between yourself and commitment, something has to fill that space: a real decision, in either direction. Do it or don't. Both are more honest than the middle ground most of us live in. If this conversation landed, I'd encourage you to sit with it before moving on. And if you've got someone in your life who lives in try mode — consider what one honest conversation might make possible.If this episode resonated, I’m exploring ideas like these more deeply in my upcoming book, Productiveness. You can follow along as it takes shape at mikevardy.com/productiveness.

This episode is brought to you by Your Clockwise Week—a personalized weekly structure built around your actual life, not an ideal one. If your week feels full but not fitting, you can learn more at mikevardy.com/yourclockwiseweek.Procrastination is often framed as avoidance of what we don’t want to do. But in this conversation, it becomes clear that it shows up just as often in the things we do want to do—the work that matters most.That’s what made this discussion with Jon Acuff so compelling. Jon’s latest book, Procrastination Proof, doesn’t treat procrastination as a flaw to fix but as a pattern to understand—and ultimately, to work with rather than against.Six Discussion PointsProcrastination isn’t a laziness issue—it’s a pattern driven by time, task, fear, history, and ego Permission can unlock progress more effectively than pressure or disciplineSmaller actions reduce friction and make consistency sustainable rather than forcedReview is the most overlooked multiplier—it reveals truth, direction, and better decisionsPlanning is where optimism meets realism—and most people get stuck between the twoAlignment between “night you” and “morning you” turns intention into action without resistanceThree Connection PointsGet Procrastination ProofJon's previous appearance on APCJoin the community to gain access to The Procrastination Course (and more)What stood out most in this conversation is that procrastination isn’t something you defeat once—it’s something you learn to navigate. When you shift from forcing action to understanding patterns, the work changes. And more importantly, your relationship with the work changes. That’s where real progress begins.If this episode resonated, I’m exploring ideas like these more deeply in my upcoming book, Productiveness. You can follow along as it takes shape at mikevardy.com/productiveness.

This episode is brought to you by Your Clockwise Week—a personalized weekly structure built around your actual life, not an ideal one. If your week feels full but not fitting, you can learn more at mikevardy.com/yourclockwiseweek.There’s a quiet trap many of us fall into when the pace picks up: we start reacting instead of leading. The inbox fills, the interruptions stack, and before long, the day is no longer ours—it’s everyone else’s.In this conversation, I sit down with Rich Czyz, author of Autopilot: Practical Productivity for School Leaders, to explore how systems—not willpower—can help us reclaim that sense of direction. While his work is rooted in education, what we discuss applies far beyond school walls. This is about shifting from firefighting to forward thinking.Six Discussion PointsProductivity isn’t about doing more—it’s about reclaiming space for what actually mattersThe inbox is often just a collection of other people’s priorities unless you set boundaries around itSystems work best when they are simple enough to start immediately and flexible enough to evolveBatching and theming aren’t constraints—they’re ways to restore focus in fragmented environmentsDelegation requires letting go of control, not just tasksElimination—not optimization—is often the most powerful first move toward meaningful workThree Connection PointsAutopilot: Practical Productivity for School LeadersFour O'Clock FacultyThe Practice of ProductivenessIf there’s a throughline in this conversation, it’s this: the goal isn’t to perfect your system—it’s to make space for what matters most. Whether you’re leading a school, a team, or simply your own day, the question is the same: what can you remove so that what remains has room to matter?If this episode resonated, I’m exploring ideas like these more deeply in my upcoming book, Productiveness. You can follow along as it takes shape at mikevardy.com/productiveness.