Order of Man

Ryan Michler and Alan Placer tackle ten questions from men dealing with family, identity, fatherhood, marriage, pain, career, and personal responsibility. They discuss how to set boundaries when financial gifts come with strings attached, what to do when a teenage son is drawn toward extreme online communities, and how to separate identity from a sport or physical ability. They also explore recognizing your parents as imperfect human beings, building self-respect without external validation, navigating disagreement over having another child, and understanding the limits of financial provision in marriage. The episode closes with a spirited debate over what actually qualifies as a sport. SHOW HIGHLIGHTS 00:00 - The Great Sport Debate 07:03 - When a Financial Gift Comes With Strings 11:35 - Embarrassing Habits at 25 18:19 - Helping a Son in Extreme Online Spaces 28:05 - Chronic Pain: Strength or Stubbornness? 37:31 - Identity After a Physical Setback 44:41 - Don't Punish Your Child for Your Past 52:10 - Building Self-Respect Without Validation 59:05 - When Dad Stops Being a Hero 01:05:59 - When Husband and Wife Disagree About Another Child 01:15:17 - When Providing Hurts Your Marriage 01:22:31 - The Sport Debate Continues 01:26:18 - War Room Invitation Battle Planners: Pick yours up today! Order Ryan's new book, The Masculinity Manifesto. For more information on the Iron Council brotherhood. Want maximum health, wealth, relationships, and abundance in your life? Sign up for our free course, 30 Days to Battle Ready

Most of what passes for leadership advice today is polish. You say the right things, avoid conflict, perform confidence until you believe it yourself. This episode is about the opposite. We're talking about what happens when you stop performing and start operating: how to build relationships that are actually real instead of transactional, how to handle conflict without flinching or blowing it up, and why the most effective leaders aren't the cleanest; they're the ones willing to own their flaws and use them. We get into the idea of the "antihero." He's not a villain, not a saint, but someone pragmatic enough to do what the moment requires instead of what looks good on camera. We talk about credibility versus performative influence, why so much content today is loud but hollow, and how the stories we tell ourselves (culturally and individually), shape whether we actually grow or just look like we are. If you're tired of leadership advice that sounds good and does nothing, this one's for you. SHOW HIGHLIGHTS 00:00 - The Power of Real Relationships 05:44 - Why Transactional Relationships Destroy Trust 07:16 - How to Handle Conflict Like an Adult 10:50 - There Is No Magical Phrase for Communication 12:45 - The Problem With Contrarian Content 16:55 - The Anti-Hero Advantage 21:41 - Why "Regular Guys" Don't Always Get Heard 25:26 - Pragmatism, Influence and Social Capital 28:50 - Understanding Your Conflict Archetype 33:30 - Integrating Your Dark Side 39:14 - Do the Ends Justify the Means? 44:05 - Why You Don't Have to Be Liked 46:17 - Dealing With Internal and External Conflict 50:17 - Why Culture Has Replaced Self-Development 53:55 - The Truth Just Isn't Sexy 55:53 - The Five Skills Everyone Needs 59:35 - The Value of Admitting Your Own Ignorance 01:03:00 - Learning to Challenge Your Own Ideas 01:04:00 - When Communication Goes Wrong and What to Learn From It Order Ryan's latest book, The Masculinity Manifesto on Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/Masculinity-Manifesto-Establishes-Influence-Credibility/dp/1684513316 Want maximum health, wealth, relationships, and abundance in your life? Sign up for our free course, 30 Days to Battle Ready. https://orderofman.link/battle-ready Download the NEW Order of Man Twelve-Week Battle Planner and maximize your week. https://orderofman.link/12-week-planner-app Support the Order of Man mission by picking up merchandise: https://orderofman.link/support-the-mission Connect with us on the socials: Instagram https://orderofman.link/instagram Facebook https://orderofman.link/facebook-page Twitter https://orderofman.link/twitter-ryan Join the Order of Man Facebook group: https://orderofman.link/facebook-group

In this episode of Friday Field Notes, Ryan Michler tackles the cultural double standard between misogyny and misandry. While modern discourse frequently condemns the hatred of women, systemic contempt toward men - misandry - is often ignored or dismissed as simple individual preference. Ryan breaks down the etymology of these terms and addresses critical disparities facing men today, including family court bias, false accusations, workforce declines, and the alarming male suicide rate. Moving beyond victimhood narratives, he distinguishes raw masculinity from true manliness, demonstrating how masculine traits are not inherently toxic but require proper direction. Tune in to understand why society must evaluate both sides of the aisle to cultivate genuine accountability, strength, and human flourishing. SHOW HIGHLIGHTS 00:00 - Defining Misogyny vs. Misandry 02:26 - The Double Standard in Cultural Discourse 04:46 - Etymology and the Power of Words 09:40 - Custody Bias and Courtroom Discouragement 10:45 - The Impact of False Accusations 12:01 - Labor Force Declines and Biological Aptitude 14:30 - The Male Suicide Epidemic and Empathy Gaps 15:45 - Rejecting the Victimhood Scoreboard 18:56 - Masculinity vs. Manliness: Harnessing Raw Power 23:18 - Stop Neutering Young Men 25:21 - Taking Sovereignty Over Your Worth Battle Planners: Pick yours up today! Order Ryan's new book, The Masculinity Manifesto. For more information on the Iron Council brotherhood. Want maximum health, wealth, relationships, and abundance in your life? Sign up for our free course, 30 Days to Battle Ready

Ryan Michler is joined by Alan Placer for this week's Ask Me Anything, tackling eight questions about fatherhood, masculinity, family, legacy, grief, mentorship, co-parenting, and business. They discuss when helping an adult child becomes enabling, what it means to be a real man, showing up for a parent with dementia, and navigating a child's relationship with a good stepfather. They also explore letting go of an inherited business legacy, dealing with infertility, becoming a mentor before you feel ready, and the hidden cost of being constantly available to your business. Along the way, Ryan and Alan return to a common theme: responsibility, boundaries, progress, and choosing to show up as the kind of man you want to be. SHOW HIGHLIGHTS 00:00 - Opening & Alan Placer Joins the AMA 01:26 - The Lindsay Clancy Trial & Personal Responsibility 09:26 - Supporting an Adult Child Without Enabling Him 17:01 - What Makes a Real Man? 24:36 - Showing Up for a Parent With Dementia 35:08 - Co-Parenting With a Good Stepfather 43:28 - Letting Go of a Legacy Your Child Didn't Choose 49:01 - Carrying the Grief of Infertility 56:18 - What Qualifies a Man to Be a Mentor? 1:02:16 - The Hidden Cost of Always Being Available 1:10:13 - Wrapping Up With Alan Placer Battle Planners: Pick yours up today! Order Ryan's new book, The Masculinity Manifesto. For more information on the Iron Council brotherhood. Want maximum health, wealth, relationships, and abundance in your life? Sign up for our free course, 30 Days to Battle Ready

Most men will never come close to the kind of suffering Brent Oliver has lived through. And, that's exactly why this conversation matters. Today we're talking about the difference between a man who lets his circumstances define him and a man who decides, moment by moment, that he's still the one in control. You're going to hear what it actually looks like to rebuild a body and a mind from nothing, and why the story you tell yourself about your pain determines whether it makes you dangerous or makes you soft. This episode is about the strength to overcome the worst moments of your life and the idea that these moments aren't happening to you, they're shaping you into either a weapon or a victim. Brent breaks down why he refused to let anyone see weakness, why he refuses pain medication to this day, and why "effort equals outcome" isn't a slogan for him; it's the only reason he's alive. If you've ever used your circumstances as an excuse to coast, this conversation is going to make that a lot harder to do. SHOW HIGHLIGHTS 00:00 - Episode Introduction 01:04 - Connecting with Ryan 03:58 - The Tragic 1991 Motorcycle Accident 05:59 - The "N of 1" Medical Study 10:12 - Understanding Incomplete Quadriplegia 12:30 - Relearning Muscle Control & Function 15:08 - Rejecting Prognoses & Forging the Mind 16:49 - A Turning Point Night in the Hospital 21:15 - Victim Mentality vs. Becoming a Good Weapon 22:15 - True Strength & Modern Vulnerability 27:26 - Overcoming the Fear of Being a Burden 31:22 - What Separates Warriors from Victims 36:21 - Choosing Mindset Over Pain Medication 38:21 - Dealing with CRPS & Severe Phantom Pain 39:42 - Mind Control, Focus, and Detachment Techniques 46:14 - Finding a Path Forward Through the Outdoors 49:55 - Perspectives on Dark Moments & Hope 55:33 - Advocating for Outdoor Accessibility and the Disabled Community 01:04:33 - How the Artificial Larynx Works 01:07:17 - Brent Oliver Foundation & Closing Thoughts Battle Planners: Pick yours up today! Order Ryan's new book, The Masculinity Manifesto. For more information on the Iron Council brotherhood. Want maximum health, wealth, relationships, and abundance in your life? Sign up for our free course, 30 Days to Battle Ready