Decoding the Gurus

The rumours of the Gurometer's demise have been greatly exaggerated. We were simply collecting enough gurus to feed three into the sacred instrument at once. In this special Triple Threat edition, Professor Jiang brings angel-informed psychohistory, Jimmy Carr brings a head full of dubious historical factoids, and Mel Robbins just desperately wants to help you (for a price). Three potential gurus, eleven characteristics, and a brief disagreement over the nature of data. Let the highly rigorous scoring commence! Also... think you can do better? Rate Jiang, Mel, Jimmy, or any of the other gurus on our online Gurometer and compare your scores with ours. Ideally, do it before listening, lest Matt declare your numbers inadmissible. https://decoding-the-gurus-gurometer.netlify.app/

Two academic windbags attempt brief discussions of the controversy at Nature, Bret’s newest conspiracy theory, and the latest vibe sessions in Podcastistan. It goes about as well as expected. The full episode is available to Patreon subscribers (1hr 18mins). Join us at: https://www.patreon.com/DecodingTheGurus Supplementary Material 55 00:00 Introduction: Science by Podcast 04:04 Nature Joins the Arday Discourse Wave 09:28 Activism and Science 14:40 Academic Prestige Bias 19:08 The Business of Academic Publishing 23:43 Sasha Gusev Being Sensible and Culture War Brainrot 29:04 Bret Weinstein and Jimmy Dore Investigate Charlie Kirk’s Death 36:13 Anomaly Hunting 42:27 Science Washing 45:00 Conspiracy Discrimination and Reasoning Ability 53:46 Academic Debate Norms 59:16 Chris Williamson Promotes Professor Jiang 01:01:01 Vibing Out in Podcast Panels: Hunter Biden x Nick Fuentes 01:05:49 Dave Rubin and Andrew Gold Discuss Political Tribalism 01:08:25 Heterodoxy in 2026: Zaid Jilani on Michael Tracey 01:12:52 Hitler Was a Human and Had Motivations 01:16:33 Outro Links Nature: The death of Jason Arday must prompt deep reflection Stuart Ritchie’s response to the Nature editorial Matthew Yglesias: Academia is cooked Sasha Gusev’s response to Matthew Yglesias Nature’s research and magazine editorial teams DarkHorse: Was Charlie Kirk Killed With a Drone? Viva Frei and Jimmy Dore Robson, S. G., Martire, K. A., Pearson, S., Cosgrove, T. J., Jetten, J., Faasse, K., & Hornsey, M. J. (2026). Rejecting conspiracies doesn't necessarily mean that you're smart: The relationship between conspiracy discrimination and reasoning ability. British Journal of Social Psychology, 65(4), e70117. Modern Wisdom: WW3 DEBATE: “We’re On the Brink of Global Collapse” Mostly Wise #2: Hunter Biden, Matt McCusker & Duncan Trussell Channel 5: Nick Fuentes Interview (Ft. Hunter Biden) I Think You Should Leave: Hot Dog Car Sketch The Rubin Report: If This Isn’t Stopped, UK’s Fall Is Irreversible | Andrew Gold Zaid Jilani on Michael Tracey’s contrarianism Zaid Jilani’s World War II follow-up Adam Tooze: The Wages of Destruction Darryl Cooper’s introduction and foreword to Thomas Cyr’s World War II revisionist book Next on Decoding Academia: Your Brain Is Not an Onion With a Tiny Reptile Inside

In Part Two of our decoding of Mel Robbins, things take a practical turn. But before we get to preoccupied with all that, why don't you pause, take a breath, and, in the context of your body, write down ten ways to make a bad situation worse. Your focus should then be on doing the exact opposite! For example, if one of your answers is to not listen to the podcast, then start listening, right now! Next, before hitting play, let's work on building a daily manifestation practice. Write down five things you want, then sit in your body, picture yourself doing all the annoying steps, and flood yourself with the feelings of future success. This needs to happen every day. One more thing: now imagine someone who is one million per cent behind you and ask them what is the best way for you to consume the podcast. They can be alive, dead, or fictional. Greek messenger Gods are permitted. You can even imagine your mother, if you like, but better. Alternatively, why not meet your future self at the front door and ask how listening to the podcast helped them to become so wise, slim, and successful? There are other options too. You can manifest a legion of ancestors, reconfigure a difficult afternoon by getting sushi, and even transcend the limits of possibility with an elephant murder themed visualization! You might think this sounds a bit like (too much) planning, mental rehearsal, and just trying to be a bit more positive. But it's much more than that. These mental activities are actually powered by very hard science. Ignore the tiny samples, one-tailed tests, and suspicious p-values... that all sounds like negative thinking. And now you are finally prepared so choose your technique, release the brake, and visualise the download button. Your future self is waiting. They have a cool scar and some bad news about your future children. Links The Mel Robbins Podcast: “World Leading Psychologist: How to Manifest Anything & Create the Life You Want” with Dr Cassandra Vieten Cassandra Vieten: Imagine That: Transform How You Think, Feel, and Live with the Science of Imagination Institute of Noetic Sciences: Origins Story Hershfield, H. E., Goldstein, D. G., Sharpe, W. F., Fox, J., Yeykelis, L., Carstensen, L. L., & Bailenson, J. N. (2011). Increasing saving behavior through age-progressed renderings of the future self. Journal of marketing research, 48(SPL), S23-S37. https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC3949005/ Robalino, J. D., Fishbane, A., Goldstein, D. G., & Hershfield, H. E. (2023). Saving for retirement: A real-world test of whether seeing photos of one’s future self encourages contributions. Behavioral Science & Policy, 9(1), 1-9. https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/10.1177/23794607231190607

We return from our holidays with an indulgent episode that starts light and ends up very dark as we turn to the unavoidable Jason Arday discourse. The full episode is available to Patreon subscribers (Full Episode: 1hr 40 mins) Join us at: https://www.patreon.com/DecodingTheGurus Supplementary Material 54 00:00 Pecan Pie Introduction 04:10 Solar Punk Matt 08:17 Ireland Trip Report 15:24 Australian Burger Culture 17:32 Manga Cafe Experiments 24:10 Joe Rogan on AI Remote Viewing 29:14 Parapsychology as a Research Field 34:07 A One Man University Level Course in Bad Thinking 36:58 The Young Info Turks 40:53 More Credulity with Ryan Grim over Fauci 42:14 Richard Ebright, Warning Signs, and Radicalisation Spirals 48:28 Vinay Prasad jumping on the Anti-Fauci wagon for the Free Press 52:31 The Jason Arday Affair 54:28 The Surrounding Context 58:18 Polemical Discourse Waves 01:05:22 The Guru Factor 01:08:25 A Realistic View of Universities as Imperfect Institutions 01:12:17 Elite Prestige Bias 01:21:33 Culture War Distortions 01:25:04 The Ethics of Critical Journalism 01:29:50 Inconsistent Standards 01:38:36 Outro Links The Jack Nicholson Story from the Always Sunny Podcast The Manga Cafes in Question Deposition of InfoWars Host Owen Shroyer Alex Jones And Roger Stone Interrupt The Young Turks Republican National Convention Coverage Ken Klippenstein visits the War Room Ana Kasparian & Owen Shroyer: The UNEXPECTED Conversation on MAGA, DSA & the Uniparty! Bret Weinstein on InfoWars Richard Ebright on one of his many Twitter spirals Joe Rogan on AI Remote Viewing The Free Press: Vinay Prasad- Anthony Fauci’s Vaccine Deceptions Ryan Grim being credulous over Fauci and Vaccines The Guardian: Playbooks, plagiarism and a pig’s head: new claims surrounding a star Cambridge professor (Lanre Bakare) The Atlantic: The Jason Arday Truthers (Helen Lewis) Front Left: It sure looks like Jason Arday was horrifically wronged (based on citation data) (Jason Stanley) A Digital Lynching (Carol Cadwalladr) Tox Report: The Most Unfortunate Thing (Sarah Ditum) Byline Times: The Peter Thiel-Linked Race Science Network that Penetrated Cambridge University and Targeted Jason Arday (Nafeez Ahmed) The Good Law Project: Stand in Solidarity with Jason Arday Amnesty UK supporting “Arday’s Law” Simon Baron Cohen on BBC 4 Today talking about Jason Arday NYT: A Top Scholar’s Fall Shows That Universities Don’t Get It NYT: Professor’s Death Leaves Behind Hard Questions for Cambridge on Race and Hiring The Emancipator: The Media Lynched Kason Arday (Ibram X. Kendi) Gideon M.K.: The Jason Arday Saga Is Terrible And Everyone Involved Should Be Ashamed Of Themselves Ways to Change the World with Krishnan Guru-Murthy: Cambridge’s youngest Black professor Jason Arday on Autism, racism, and learning to read at 18 Open (supporting) letter on the suspension of Nathan Cofnas at Ghent University Board Member of Ghent University (Dries Bostyn) discussing the disciplinary case on Twitter Numb at the Lodge: The Carrion-Eaters (Sam Kriss) The Chronicle of Higher Education: Jason Arday & Me (Musa al-Gharbi) US Ambassador applies pressure to Ghent University Nathan Cofnas thanks the US Ambassador for intervening Academia is Doing Fine, Actually (Nicholas Decker) Eric Turkheimer substack on Nathan Cofnas' views Sasha Gusev thread on Nathan Cofnas' views

Are you tired, stuck, or inconveniently constrained by reality? Good news: you may simply be imagining the wrong one. In Part One of our decoding of Mel Robbins, we explore the world of a self-help mogul who is also just a simple mother of three in Vermont hosting a little ol' podcast with a HUGE global impact. Together with Cassandra Vieten, a psychologist who is (apparently) one of the world's leading researchers on imagination and consciousness, Mel explains how to begin to stop reacting and start imagining, visualising, and manifesting the life you truly deserve. This will lead to self-actualised transcendence through a variety of simple-to-implement techniques. But don't worry, the universe has also put in safeguards: manifestation only works if you use it for good, such as empowering your authentic self. So please manifest enthusiastically without any concern. In the episode, you will learn about the delicate art of rebranding common sense into complex (proprietary) theories and be shocked to discover that mystical intuitions are a core component of any fully holistic scientific research. Mel's HUGE media business, meanwhile, manifests itself as an intimate personal friendship with each of her millions of listeners. Expect the usual decorative scholarship, a new Five Second Rule and insights into how to Let Them and Let You, reality tunnels, obstacle courses, a thousand supportive women, lighthouses, tapestries, and the therapeutic potential of fire-breathing dragons. All of it is very hard science, as they repeatedly remind us. Chris and Matt attempt throughout to give the self-help genre a fair-minded assessment. They even concede that wearing colourful socks and being a bit less miserable are probably harmless, but ultimately their dark reductionist souls are beyond salvation. Part Two is coming next week. In the meantime, try to visualise it clearly, align your energy, and not to put one foot on the brake as you hit the download button. Links The Mel Robbins Podcast: “World Leading Psychologist: How to Manifest Anything & Create the Life You Want” with Dr Cassandra Vieten A Bit Fruity with Matt Bernstein: “The Mel Robbins Griftpocalypse” with Princess Weekes and Kat Tenbarge CBS News: Extended Interview with Mel Robbins The Mel Robbins Podcast: “Try It for 1 Week: 6 Small Ways to Bring Back the Happiness, Energy, and Fun” The New York Times: “Mel Schneeberger and Chris Robbins” by Lois Smith Brady UC San Diego profile: Cassandra Vieten, PhD