When Divorce is a Form of Abuse with Lisa Johnson + Chris Barry

Content Warning: This episode contains discussions of domestic violence, emotional abuse, coercive control, childhood trauma, and high-conflict divorce. Some topics may be difficult to hear. Please listen with care. The relationship is over. The abuse isn't. And somehow, the kids pay the price. For some people, divorce means a fresh start. For others, it's where the real nightmare begins. Lisa Johnson and Chris Barry, co-founders of Been There Got Out, know firsthand what happens when an ex refuses to let go of control. Now certified high-conflict divorce strategists and authors, they help people navigate the legal, financial, and emotional chaos of separating from someone who seems more interested in punishment than resolution. In this episode of Giving Pain Purpose, Lisa and Chris join Lyndsay for an eye-opening conversation about narcissistic behaviours, coercive control, legal abuse, and the ways children become caught in the crossfire. They unpack the red flags of a high-conflict divorce, why traditional advice can backfire, and how communication, documentation, and understanding the family court system can make an enormous difference. This conversation hits especially close to home for Lyndsay, who opens up about the abuse, broken promises, and parental conflict that shaped her childhood—and the wounds she's still making sense of decades later. The most important battle isn't always the one happening in court. Sometimes it's making sure the next generation doesn't spend a lifetime healing from it. Important Information: If you or your children are in immediate physical danger, call the police or contact your local domestic violence center.   National Domestic Violence Hotline at 800-799-7233  Childhelp National Child Abuse Hotline at 800-422-4453 (USA) Episode Highlights: (00:00) Introduction to the episode and guests (04:14) How Lisa and Chris met and their personal stories (08:37) The founding of BTGO and their mission (10:30) Understanding narcissism and high-conflict divorce (15:03) Red flags indicating high-conflict cases (19:56) Handling children in high-conflict divorces (23:45) Coaching clients and communication strategies (30:01) Mental health considerations in custody cases (38:44) Protecting children and managing alienation (47:56) A memorable client story and lessons learned (50:33) Global reach and online presence of BTGO (54:40) Closing remarks and resources Find Lisa Johnson + Chris Barry Here: Website: www.beentheregotout.com Instagram: @been_there_got_out Facebook:  Been There Got Out LinkedIn: Been There Got Out TikTok: @been_there_got_out YouTube: @BeenThereGotOut X: @BeenThereGotOut Answer Hub: https://beentheregotout.com/answers/ Book: Been There Got Out Book: When Your Ex Turns the Kids Against You Find Giving Pain Purpose Online Here: Website: givingpainpurpose.com Instagram: @givingpainpurpose Facebook: The Giving Pain Purpose Podcast LinkedIn: Lyndsay Soprano TikTok: @givingpainpurpose YouTube: @givingpainpurpose Shop: thegivingpainpurposeshop.com Subscribe on YouTube | Merch Shop is OPEN!! | COMING SOON: The Pain Hub - A Women's Healing Community. Subscribe Now! Unfiltered convos. Dark humor. Real healing.  This is where pain meets purpose — and you’re not doing it alone. ++ Want to be a guest on Giving Pain Purpose with Lyndsay Soprano? Be a Guest on The Show