Kingdom Life Coaching: Untangle the Noise, Hear God's Voice, Clarify Your Calling

Ep 168 // Understanding Trauma, Healing, and Breaking Family Cycles | Part Two with Gina Birkemeir We either pass on our healing or we pass on our hurting. But how do you recognize the patterns that have been passed down through your family? And once you see them, how do you actually begin to break the cycle? In Part Two of Megan's conversation with licensed professional counselor, trauma specialist, professor, and Generations Deep author Gina Birkemeier, we move from Gina's personal story of trauma and redemption into the practical work of healing. Gina explains how generational trauma isn't always as obvious as addiction or abuse repeating from one generation to the next. Sometimes what gets passed down is more subtle: fear, control, codependency, emotional avoidance, unhealthy coping mechanisms, or unspoken family rules about which emotions are acceptable. And sometimes, what looks like one problem on the surface has a completely different root underneath. For example: control may actually have its roots in fear. Megan shares vulnerably about recognizing a generational pattern of control in her own family—and how motherhood and adoption exposed places where fear, identity, and the desire to control outcomes were affecting her relationships. Together, Megan and Gina explore what it looks like to respond to these discoveries with curiosity instead of condemnation. Rather than asking, What's wrong with me? healing invites us to ask: What's happening inside of me? Where did this come from? And Lord, what are You inviting me to see? In this episode, you'll hear: What generational trauma is and how patterns get passed down through families Why we often pass on what we haven't healed How unhealthy coping mechanisms can change forms from one generation to the next Why cycle-breaking has to begin with your own healing How fear can disguise itself as control Why curiosity is more helpful than shame when unhealthy patterns surface The connection between vulnerability, safety, and healing How to set healthy boundaries without simply cutting people out of your life The difference between healthy conflict and an unsafe relationship How Christians can unintentionally "spiritually bypass" someone's pain What it means to become a safe person for someone else's story Why you are not the Holy Spirit in someone else's life How forgiveness differs from reconciliation and restored access Why forgiveness may be a process rather than a one-time decision How God can redeem even the parts of your story you thought were beyond repair Gina also offers an important distinction when it comes to boundaries: healthy relationships aren't relationships without conflict. Safe people can disagree, have difficult conversations, and speak truth in love. Boundaries aren't meant to punish someone; they're meant to protect what God is healing. And when someone shares their pain with us, our first job isn't necessarily to offer a Bible verse, an explanation, or advice. Sometimes becoming a safe person means simply being willing to sit with someone in their grief before trying to make sense of it. As Gina reminds us, you are not the Holy Spirit in someone else's life. Love doesn't require controlling another person's journey. It creates room for God to work. Toward the end of the conversation, Megan and Gina also tackle the complicated topic of forgiveness. Forgiving someone does not automatically mean giving them access to your life again. Forgiveness, reconciliation, and boundaries are different things—and healing doesn't have to happen on someone else's timeline. If something in this conversation brings one of your own family patterns to the surface, don't rush into shame. Get curious. Ask God: What are You inviting me to see? What am I carrying that You want to heal? What is my next faithful step? Because the cycle can change and healing can begin with you. Connect with Gina Birkemeier Book: Generations Deep: Unmasking Inherited Dysfunction and Trauma to Rewrite our Stories Through Faith and Therapy Specialties: Trauma, generational trauma, family patterns, faith-integrated counseling Website: ginabirkemeier.com Instagram: @myoutloudvoice Connect with Megan Nilsen Website: meganbnilsen.com Social: Instagram, Facebook, LinkedIn Grab the Book: Untangled Faith+Companion Journal Free Gift: 30-Day Grace + Truth (Daily) Devotional Book a free discovery call to see if Kingdom Life Coaching could help you unlock your next right step!

Ep 167 // When God Rebuilds What Trauma Tried to Destroy | Part One with Gina Birkemeir What if some of the patterns you struggle with today began long before you had words to explain them? And what if healing doesn’t require minimizing what happened (or blaming God for it) but learning to name your story honestly and discover where He was in the midst of it? In Part One of this powerful conversation, Megan sits down with licensed professional counselor, trauma specialist, professor, and Generations Deep author Gina Birkemeier. Gina shares her deeply personal story of adoption, family dysfunction, addiction, neglect, abuse, people-pleasing, and the painful belief that something must be fundamentally wrong with her. She also shares how those experiences shaped her early understanding of God as punitive and untrustworthy and how God slowly began rebuilding that picture. This is a story of God patiently meeting Gina in the middle of brokenness, providing for her when everything seemed to fall apart, and teaching her that He could actually be trusted. Megan and Gina also explore an important question for anyone who has experienced pain: If God is good, why did He allow this to happen? Together, they discuss the difference between God's character and the harmful choices people make, why healing involves our mind, body, spirit, and relationships, and how therapy and faith can work together rather than compete with one another. The conversation then turns toward understanding trauma itself—including the experiences we often dismiss because they don't seem "bad enough" compared with someone else's story. In this episode, you'll hear: How childhood trauma can shape identity, relationships, and our understanding of God Why Gina once believed, "I believed in God, but I wasn't sure He believed in me" How people-pleasing and survival strategies can develop in childhood Why God's character should not be confused with the harmful choices people make How Gina began learning that God could be trusted Why emotional health and spiritual health cannot simply be separated How faith and trauma-informed therapy can work together The difference between a traumatic event and the trauma that remains afterward How "little-t" trauma can accumulate over time What it means to be "parentified" or "spousified" as a child Why comparison can keep us from acknowledging our own wounds A practical first step when you begin recognizing unhealthy patterns from your past One of the most important reminders from this conversation: You can't heal something you refuse to name. Your story doesn't have to look like someone else's for it to matter. Healing can begin when we become curious about what happened, what we came to believe because of it, and what God might want to restore. And this is only Part One. In Part Two, Megan and Gina go deeper into generational trauma: how patterns get passed from one generation to the next, how trauma affects our brains, bodies, and relationships, and what it looks like to intentionally break unhealthy cycles. Connect with Gina Birkemeier Book: Generations Deep: Unmasking Inherited Dysfunction and Trauma to Rewrite our Stories Through Faith and Therapy Specialties: Trauma, generational trauma, family patterns, faith-integrated counseling Website: ginabirkemeier.com Instagram: @myoutloudvoice Connect with Megan Website: meganbnilsen.com Social: Instagram, Facebook, LinkedIn Grab the Book: Untangled Faith+Companion Journal Free Gift: 30-Day Grace + Truth (Daily) Devotional Book a free discovery call to see if Kingdom Life Coaching could help you unlock your next right step!

Ep 166 // Feeling Spiritually Stuck? God's Invitation to Begin Again | Em Tyler What do you do when you believe God is leading you—but His direction doesn’t make sense, feels uncomfortable, or takes you somewhere you never expected? And what happens when disappointment leaves you wondering if you have the courage to hope again? In this episode of the Kingdom Life Coaching Podcast, I’m joined by author, speaker, Bible teacher, and founder of Grow + Go, Em Tyler, for an honest conversation about hearing God’s voice, trusting His timing, surrendering our need for control, and continuing to follow Jesus through every season. Em shares how Scripture has anchored some of the biggest decisions of her life—from ministry transitions and international moves to painful endings and unexpected new beginnings. We also talk about the tension between calling and striving, why we don’t need a title to live out our God-given purpose, and how to recognize when anxiety may be revealing that we’ve started gripping something God is asking us to surrender. Em also shares the powerful story behind her new book, The Power of Again: Come as You Are, Grow Your Faith and Go the Distance with Jesus. After returning to England from New Zealand depleted and discouraged, Em sensed God inviting her to hope again. That invitation became a message for anyone who secretly wonders, Shouldn’t I be further along in my faith by now? In this episode, we talk about: How to discern God’s voice when facing a major decision Why knowing Scripture helps us recognize the voice of the Holy Spirit The role of peace, Scripture, prayer, and godly counsel in discernment Why obedience doesn’t always feel comfortable How Em and her husband discerned major ministry moves from England to New Zealand and back again What hidden seasons taught Em about identity, leadership, and calling The difference between partnering with God and striving for God Why anxiety can sometimes reveal where we’re trying to regain control How to release comparison and trust God with your unique calling What it means to return to Jesus again and again How disappointment can make hope feel risky—and why God still invites us to hope Why spiritual maturity isn’t about finally getting faith “right,” but continually returning to Jesus Join Em + Megan for a Live Masterclass Hearing God’s Voice: A Beautiful Exchange Journaling Experience for Everyday Discernment Em and I are teaming up for a special 90-minute live masterclass on October 8! If you’ve ever wondered, Was that God—or was that just me?, this experience is designed to help you grow in confidence as you discern the Holy Spirit’s leading while staying firmly anchored in Scripture. I’ll also guide you through my Beautiful Exchange Journaling Method, a practical, Scripture-centered process for slowing down, listening, identifying what may be influencing your thoughts, and exchanging lies and fear for the truth of God. October 8 | 90-minute live online experience 👉 REGISTER HERE Connect with Em Tyler Website: emtyler.com The Power of Again + Book Quiz: powerofagain.com Substack: emtyler.substack.com Instagram: @helloemtyler YouTube: @helloemtyler Podcast: Grow and Go with Em Tyler The Power of Again: Come as You Are, Grow Your Faith and Go the Distance with Jesus releases November 13, 2026. Connect with Megan: Website: meganbnilsen.com Social: Instagram, Facebook, LinkedIn Grab the Book: Untangled Faith+Companion Journal Free Gift: 30-Day Grace + Truth (Daily) Devotional Book a free discovery call to see if Kingdom Life Coaching could help you unlock your next right step! If this conversation encouraged you, share it with a friend who may need the reminder that she isn’t behind, God isn’t finished, and there is always grace to come back to Jesus again.

Ep 165 // How to Deepen Your Relationship with God: Spiritual Disciplines That Actually Transform You | Monica Ritchie What does it actually mean to “go deeper with God”? Pray more. Read your Bible. Be still. Listen for God's voice. Practice Sabbath. Fast. We hear these invitations all the time in the Christian life—but sometimes no one tells us how to actually live them out. And even good spiritual practices can quietly become another checklist of things we think we need to do to be a “good Christian.” In this episode of the Kingdom Life Coaching Podcast, Megan welcomes back Monica Ritchie, author of the new book Fashioned by Faith: Spiritual Disciplines for Deepening Your Relationship with God, for a practical and honest conversation about what it looks like to create space for God to truly transform us. Monica shares the powerful encounter with God that cracked open her understanding of faith—and why even a dramatic encounter with God isn't enough to sustain a lifetime of spiritual growth. Real formation happens as we continually turn our hearts toward God and allow Him to shape us in the ordinary rhythms of everyday life. Megan and Monica explore prayer, fasting, Sabbath, Scripture, silence and solitude, lament, community, discernment, and hearing God's voice—but without turning spiritual formation into another exercise in Christian performance. Because spiritual disciplines aren't about earning God's love. You're already loved. They're an invitation to deeper relationship. In this episode, you'll discover: Why you can have a powerful encounter with God and still need the slow work of spiritual formation How to pursue spiritual disciplines without falling into checklist Christianity or spiritual performance Why Monica thinks of sanctification more like a circle than a ladder How to recognize the everyday things that may be shaping you more than your faith Why prayer isn't only about talking to God—but creating room to hear from Him How “wandering prayer” can turn your distracted thoughts into an opportunity for connection with the Holy Spirit How to discern God's voice while maintaining healthy wisdom and skepticism Why fasting may involve much more than giving up food How Monica's own “no-buy” fast exposed the role shopping had begun to play in her life Why understanding biblical context can completely change how you experience Scripture and the character of God The difference between reading the Bible for information and formation Why lament, anger, questions and disappointment don't scare God How to take your struggles “vertically” to God rather than only processing them horizontally with other people The important difference between spiritual contentment and complacency How to choose one simple spiritual practice that fits the season God has you in right now A question to carry with you What is fashioning you right now? We are all being formed by something—our habits, relationships, schedules, social media feeds, fears, desires, culture, successes and disappointments. The question isn't whether you're being formed. It's what is forming you—and who are you becoming as a result? Rather than trying to manufacture spiritual transformation, consider what it might look like to make room for God. Ask Him: Lord, what are You inviting me into in this season? Is there a practice that could help me become more attentive to You and more receptive to what You're doing in me? You don't have to master every spiritual discipline. Begin with the invitation God is placing in front of you today. Connect with Monica Ritchie Pick up Monica's new book, Fashioned by Faith: Spiritual Disciplines for Deepening Your Relationship with God, wherever books are sold. Follow Monica on Instagram and find her on Substack for more conversations about theology, faith and spiritual formation. And if you enjoy Fashioned by Faith, consider leaving Monica a review on Amazon or Goodreads. Reviews are a simple but meaningful way to support an author and help more readers discover the book. Connect with Megan If this conversation stirred a desire to grow in hearing God's voice, spiritual discernment, and living more intentionally with God, continue exploring these themes through the Kingdom Life Coaching Podcast. You can also find Megan's book and journal, Untangled Faith, and learn more about her resources and coaching designed to help you anchor your identity in Christ, align your life with God's voice, and take faith-filled action. Listen to Megan's first conversation with Monica Ritchie: Ep 142 // How to Understand Scripture (and Love It Again) with Seminarian Monica Ritchie Connect with Monica: Website: monicaritchie.com Instagram: @itsmonicaritchie Book: Fashioned by Faith: Spiritual Disciplines for Deepening Your Relationship with God Connect with Megan: Website: meganbnilsen.com Social: Instagram, Facebook, LinkedIn Grab the Book: Untangled Faith+Companion Journal Free Gift: 30-Day Grace + Truth (Daily) Devotional Book a free discovery call to see if Kingdom Life Coaching could help you unlock your next right step!

Ep 164 // How to Hear God's Voice and Walk in Spiritual Authority | Rachel Faulkner Brown (Part Two) How do you know when God is speaking? What does spiritual authority actually look like? And how can you walk in freedom instead of fear? In Part Two of my conversation with Rachel Faulkner Brown, we move from her remarkable story of grief, loss, and widowhoood into the practical lessons God has taught her through years of healing, ministry, and walking closely with the Holy Spirit. Rachel shares how she has learned to recognize God's voice, discern spiritual warfare with wisdom, walk in the authority of Christ, and experience deeper freedom through honesty, confession, and surrender. We also talk about the birth of Never Alone Widows and the powerful ways God continues to redeem pain by bringing hope to thousands of women across the country. In this episode, you'll learn: How Rachel recognizes God's voice. Different ways the Holy Spirit speaks. What spiritual authority really means for believers. How to discern spiritual warfare without living in fear. Why confession and vulnerability lead to healing. How unforgiveness and offense can keep us stuck. Why embracing mystery can deepen your faith. What it looks like to receive God's generosity—not just serve Him. Whether you're longing to hear God more clearly, grow in discernment, or walk with greater confidence in Christ, this conversation is filled with practical, biblical encouragement you can begin applying today. God is still speaking. The question is: Are we learning to recognize His voice? Resources Mentioned Never Alone Widows Frank Peretti's This Present Darkness John Bevere's The Bait of Satan Connect with Rachel: Instagram: @rachelfaulkerbrown, @neveralonwidows Website: rachelfaulknerbrown.com , Neveralonewidows.com Connect with Megan: Website: meganbnilsen.com Social: Instagram, Facebook, LinkedIn Grab the Book: Untangled Faith+Companion Journal Free Gift: 30-Day Grace + Truth (Daily) Devotional Book a free discovery call to see if Kingdom Life Coaching could help you unlock your next right step!