Episode 09: Leadership AND…Origin Stories

In this deeply personal episode, Josh and Patrick step outside their comfort zones and begin sharing their origin stories: the experiences, relationships, hardships, and unexpected opportunities that shaped who they are today. Patrick opens up about being born in California, raised in Mexico City, and growing up without knowing his father. He reflects on being raised by his grandmother and uncles, moving between two countries, struggling to understand where he belonged, navigating co-parenting, and eventually building a career that took him behind the scenes with some of the world’s biggest artists. Josh shares how his parents’ divorce shaped his childhood, what it was like constantly moving between two homes, and how an early desire to make his own money unexpectedly led to a long career in the fitness industry... and eventually to the work he does today. Along the way, they discover parallels in their stories that even they hadn’t recognized before. Their conversation offers a real-time example of what can happen when we replace judgment with curiosity, ask one more question, and give another person the space to be known. Because vulnerability fuels connection. And when we understand what someone has experienced, we begin to understand why they are the way they are. In This Episode * Why sharing our stories can feel uncomfortable and why it matters to do it anyway * The Lighthouse Origin Story framework * How vulnerability creates connection and builds trust * The difference between asking “What’s wrong with you?” and “What happened to you?” * How childhood experiences continue shaping the way we lead, parent, and relate to others * Patrick’s experience growing up between Mexico and the United States * The hidden challenges children navigate when moving between two homes * What healthy co-parenting can look like after a relationship ends * Josh’s experience growing up with divorced parents * The people and opportunities that helped shape their professional paths * How Patrick went from working in a photo lab to photographing tours for Taylor Swift, the Jonas Brothers, Shakira, and others * The simple “FORM” framework for getting to know someone * How to show common ground without becoming the “Me Monster” * Why genuine curiosity may be one of the most powerful relationship-building tools we have Resources Mentioned * Brianna Donovan - Lighthouse Blog Post - https://lighthouseinstitute.com/2026/07/20/mindset-rewriting-the-stories-that-shape-us/ * What Happened to You? Conversations on Trauma, Resilience, and Healing by Dr. Bruce Perry and Oprah Winfrey - https://www.goodreads.com/en/book/show/53238858-what-happened-to-you * Brené Brown’s invitation to turn judgment into curiosity - https://brenebrown.com/podcast/brene-with-jim-collins-on-curiosity-generosity-and-the-hedgehog/ * Jefferson Fisher’s reminder that “maybe” can create space for empathy - https://www.linkedin.com/posts/jeffersonfisher_the-word-maybe-has-the-power-to-change-activity-7467266233583796224-iwxt * Brian Regan - “Me” Monster - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vymaDgJ7KLg * Enemy Pie by Derek Munson - https://www.goodreads.com/en/book/show/103814.Enemy_Pie Timestamps 05:30 — Fidget toys, cell phones, and permission to be fully present 09:42 — Why Josh and Patrick are sharing their personal stories 10:32 — Vulnerability, trust, and the depth of our relationships 14:32 — Why telling your story matters 18:23 — Shifting from “What’s wrong with you?” to “What happened to you?” 22:56 — The Lighthouse Origin Story framework 26:49 — Patrick’s origin story: Born in California and raised in Mexico City 34:01 — Josh’s childhood and his parents’ divorce 40:12 — Protecting children during divorce and separation 43:21 — Patrick’s experiences with separation and co-parenting 51:01 — Building a blended family with four boys 54:55 — Patrick’s childhood education and the uncle who invested in him 59:23 — Moving from Montessori to a dramatically different school environment 1:01:40 — Growing up between two countries and searching for belonging 1:14:38 — Josh’s childhood, school years, and family dynamics 1:23:55 — The experiences that led Josh toward the Marine Corps 1:37:21 — Patrick returns to California and begins pursuing photography 1:43:56 — Passion, practicality, and the willingness to “do anything” 1:46:48 — How Josh’s first job became a career in fitness 1:49:34 — The mentors and father figures who shaped Patrick 1:54:29 — From a photo lab to photographing major concert tours 2:03:38 — What a tour photographer actually does 2:08:36 — Why telling human stories became more fulfilling than photographing celebrities 2:09:58 — Turning judgment into curiosity 2:12:33 — The simplest way to build a meaningful connection 2:13:11 — Staying in awe and using the FORM conversation framework 2:15:26 — Ask the question... and then let the other person talk 2:16:41 — How to avoid becoming the “Me Monster” 2:19:20 — What Enemy Pie teaches us about getting to know people 2:20:39 — The challenge: Sit beside someone and get curious About Lighthouse Institute At Lighthouse Institute, we believe better leadership starts with becoming a better human. Through leadership development, executive coaching, and transformational experiences, we help individuals and organizations build the self-awareness, skills, and relationships that create meaningful, lasting change. The Leadership, And... podcast explores leadership through the lens of real life: work, parenting, marriage, conflict, purpose, growth, and everything in between. 👉 SUBSCRIBE for more conversations about leadership, parenting, relationships, conflict, growth, and the human side of leadership. 👉 SHARE this episode with someone who's doing the work of becoming a better human and a better leader. Let's Go Shine Bright ✨