Living and Loving Your Life with Chantel Allen

Have you ever found yourself wondering, "Would anyone reach out if I stopped trying so hard?" That quiet ache of not being chosen, not being invited, or not feeling truly seen—it's real. And it hurts.

In this deeply personal episode, I open up about a conversation with my daughter that mirrored a theme I see not only in my clients, but in myself: the ache of wanting to belong, to be picked, to matter without effort.

We talk about:

• Why being overlooked triggers something deeper than just disappointment

• The neuroscience behind why this ache sticks with us (even when we are loved)

• The subtle ways we abandon ourselves trying to be chosen

• A simple yet powerful walkthrough to start healing this ache in real time

• How to reconnect to the part of you that's waiting to be seen by you

This isn't about pretending it doesn't hurt. It's about learning how to stay present with the ache, how to honor what's real, and how to come home to yourself in the moments you feel most invisible.

If you've been in a long season of "hard," if you feel like you're white-knuckling your way through connection, or if you're simply tired of always initiating—this is for you.

If you're tired of doing everything "right" and still feeling like it's not enough—this one's for you.

In this heart-led solo episode, Chantel opens up about a quiet Monday morning that turned into a deeply healing moment with a younger version of herself—the one who's been carrying the pressure, chasing worth through achievement, and holding it all together for far too long.

You'll hear her process in real-time:

• The hidden beliefs behind hustle and high achievement

• The grief of unmet expectations and feeling like life should have looked different by now

• How the fear of being wrong and being alone has shaped her story

• What it really means to surrender and receive—even when it feels like nothing is happening

• And the gentle truth she's learning to live into: "You don't have to earn your rest. You don't have to do it alone."

Whether you're a coach, a mom, a high-achiever, or someone simply longing to feel seen—you'll find space in this episode to breathe, to soften, and to be reminded that you're not the only one.

You're not broken. You're just tired. And you're allowed to rest.

Episode Summary: Ever feel like you're never where you're supposed to be? Like no matter how much you accomplish, grow, or heal, you're always looking ahead to the next thing?

That's because arrival—that moment where you finally feel like you've "made it"—doesn't actually exist.

In this episode, we're breaking down: ✅ Why the idea of arrival is an illusion (and how it keeps you stuck) ✅ How your mind constantly moves the finish line, making it impossible to feel like you're "there" ✅ The simple but powerful shift that helps you stop chasing and start experiencing life ✅ Three practical ways to shift out of proving and into being

If you've ever felt like you're running on an endless treadmill, chasing something just out of reach—this episode is for you.

🔹 Arrival is a myth. No one ever "gets there" because the mind keeps shifting where "there" is. 🔹 If you feel like you're never enough, it's not because you're behind—it's because you're chasing an illusion. 🔹 The secret? Noticing the micro-moments of arrival that are already happening. 🔹 The path to fulfillment isn't about reaching some final goal—it's about actually being present for the journey.

1️⃣ Catch yourself chasing arrival. When you think, "I'll be happy when…"—pause. Ask, "Is this actually true?" 2️⃣ Celebrate micro-moments. Instead of waiting for a huge achievement, start recognizing when you're already showing up as the person you want to be. 3️⃣ Ask yourself: What if I never 'get there'? If nothing changed, could you still be content? How would you live differently if you weren't chasing a finish line?