307. Courage to be Assertive and Stop People-Pleasing

Send us Fan Mail In this first episode of our 5-part mini-series about Having Courage,  we focus on the ability to be assertive without losing who you are. Can you become more assertive without becoming a completely different version of yourself? This week’s letter from the SFAC Postbag comes from a self-confessed people-pleaser who says yes when they want to say no, softens what they really think and spends far too much time wondering whether other people are annoyed with them. Now they’ve stepped into a more senior role, they know they need to be more decisive - but what if people think they’ve changed, or worse, that they’re suddenly difficult? In this episode, we explore the courage it takes to be assertive when you’re used to keeping everyone else happy. From recognising the difference between being assertive and being aggressive, to setting boundaries, saying no and resisting the urge to seek everybody else’s approval, we share practical ways to say what you mean and make confident decisions while still being warm, human and completely yourself. Because you can be kind without always saying yes – and being liked doesn’t have to be the price of speaking up.  Our call to action: notice one moment when your instinct is to people-please, and practise choosing what you really think, need or want instead.