When Sex Becomes Performance | C.R. Herro on Love Addiction, Relationships, & Intimacy

Have a question or comment? Send it to Kristin! What if the thing keeping you from real intimacy isn’t your sex life... it's the version of yourself you’re performing inside it? Therapist C.R. Herro is back on Sex, Drugs & Soul, and this conversation dives straight into the messy middle of sex, addiction, relationships, self-worth, and our desire to be seen. We unpack how so many of us learn to perform for love long before we ever enter the bedroom and how those patterns can follow us into dating, relationships, and sexuality. C.R. and I talk about... • Why external validation can quietly sabotage intimacy • The difference between authentic sexual expression and performative sex • Why orgasm, intensity, desirability, or being “good in bed” can become ego-driven • Love addiction, love avoidance, and how the two can feed each other • Why the intention underneath a behavior matters more than the behavior itself • How childhood conditioning around worthiness can shape adult relationships • What healthy intimacy actually looks like: boundaries, honesty, reciprocity, positive intent, and authenticity • Why recovery from sex addiction can require temporarily taking sex off the table • Relearning intimacy through connection outside the bedroom • FANOS, "the last hug ever,” and other ways to practice being genuinely present with a partner • Why healing can change the shape of your “puzzle piece” and how not everyone will fit anymore We also get into the loneliness that can come with becoming more honest, selective, and intentional about who gets access to you. Because being desired isn't the same as being known. And if someone is falling in love with the mask you created to feel safe, you may end up lonely underneath it.  This one is about taking the mask off, telling yourself the truth, and creating relationships and sex that actually have a chance of nourishing you. Support the show Connect with Kristin: Website: kristinbirdwell.com Instagram: @kristinbirdwell_ Facebook YouTube Kristin’s Book: Sex, Drugs, & Soul Spotify Audiobook Peptides: Oral Quicksilver GHK/Copper Peptide https://elliemd.com/kristinbirdwell Microdose 🍄 https://myfeelium.co/ password: opensesame Code: kristin20 for 20% off Subscribe to Pod: YouTube Spotify Apple