You Are More Than Your Worst Mistake: Ranae on Healing After Prison, Resilience, and Second Chances — Part 2

Can prison become the place where someone finally begins to heal from a lifetime of trauma? In Part 2, Ranae Van Roekel returns with G-Rex and Dirty Skittles to discuss surviving a serious mental health crisis, discovering healthier coping skills during incarceration, rebuilding relationships, and creating a new purpose through Connecting to Cope. Awards & Downloads Sh!t That Goes On In Our Heads is a 2024 People’s Choice Podcast Award Winner (Best Health), 2024 Women in Podcasting Award Winner (Best Mental Health Podcast), 2026 Podcast Tonight Award Winner (Best Mental Health Podcast), and 2026 NYC Podcast Award Audience Choice Winner (Best Hosts), with over 4.5 million downloads and listened to in over 160 countries. Feedback We’d love to hear your thoughts! Leave us written or voice feedback here: https://castfeedback.com/67521f0bde0b101c7b10442a Mental Health Quote “You are not the worst thing you ever did.” — Ranae Van Roekel Trigger Notice + 988 Crisis Reminder Content Notice: This episode includes discussions of suicidal thoughts, severe depression, childhood sexual trauma, incarceration, and mental health treatment. The conversation also explores recovery, self-worth, and the importance of supportive relationships. If you or someone you know is experiencing a mental health crisis in the United States, call or text 988 or visit: https://988lifeline.org/ For crisis resources outside the United States: https://findahelpline.com/ Episode Description Imagine walking into prison carrying decades of shame, untreated childhood trauma, and the belief that your worst decisions are all you'll ever be remembered for. Now imagine discovering that healing is still possible. In Part 2, Ranae Van Roekel returns to Sh!t That Goes On In Our Heads for a powerful conversation with G-Rex and Dirty Skittles about mental health recovery, resilience, incarceration, and rebuilding a life after devastating choices. Before entering prison, Ranae experienced severe depression and suicidal thoughts that led to a stay at a mental health treatment facility. Although she had begun recognizing her need for help, it wasn't until incarceration that she started confronting the childhood trauma she had spent decades suppressing. Ranae shares how therapy, psychiatric care, physical activity, self-esteem classes, and meaningful friendships helped her challenge deeply ingrained beliefs about herself. A mental health professional who refused to accept her avoidance became especially important in helping her recognize destructive thinking patterns. After serving 36 months, Ranae returned home during the COVID-19 pandemic. Reconnecting with her husband and sons, setting healthier boundaries, and welcoming her beloved dog, Cope, helped shape her next chapter. That journey inspired Connecting to Cope, her platform for emotional wellness, self-care, and compassionate support. Together, the trio explores how forgiveness differs from accountability, why healing requires ongoing effort, and how supportive relationships can help people rebuild without erasing the harm they've caused. Ranae's message is simple but powerful: your past is part of your story, not your entire identity. No matter how far you've fallen, the next step still matters. Keywords: Ranae Van Roekel, healing after prison, mental health recovery, trauma healing, resilience and recovery, prison rehabilitation, second chances, suicide prevention, emotional resilience, mental health treatment, self-worth and shame, coping skills, rebuilding after incarceration, Connecting to Cope, personal transformation Meet Our Guest — Ranae Van Roekel Ranae Van Roekel is a mental health advocate, justice reform advocate, and founder of Connecting to Cope, an initiative focused on helping people find healing and growth beyond their circumstances. Drawing from her experiences with childhood trauma, federal incarceration, mental health treatment, and rebuilding her life, she encourages others to recognize their worth while taking responsibility for their actions. Ranae is also a wife, mother, grandmother, and devoted dog lover who believes that empathy, honest conversations, and ongoing personal work can create meaningful change. Connect with Ranae: Website: https://connectingtocope.com/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/connectingtocope/ LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/company/connecting-to-cope/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@ConnectingtoCope Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/connectingtocope/ Key Takeaways Healing can begin in unexpected places. Ranae started confronting decades of unresolved childhood trauma while serving her prison sentence, although she acknowledges that incarceration itself does not guarantee healing. Mental health recovery happens one step at a time. Counseling, physical activity, better sleep, and learning new ways of thinking helped Ranae build a healthier foundation. Your past does not have to define your identity. Ranae encourages people to recognize the full picture of who they are rather than reducing themselves to their worst decisions. Healthy boundaries are essential to rebuilding relationships. Returning home meant recognizing which friendships were supportive and which relationships were no longer healthy for her. Real support includes accountability. Ranae credits her husband and sons with loving her while also challenging her when she slips into old people-pleasing patterns. Recovery is an ongoing practice, not a finish line. Ranae openly acknowledges that she still experiences anxiety, makes mistakes, and must continually practice healthier coping skills. Actionable Items Start with one manageable step. Identify one small action that supports your well-being today, whether that's taking a walk, reaching out for support, or creating space to rest. Challenge all-or-nothing self-judgment. When shame tells you that one mistake defines your entire life, remind yourself that you are responsible for your choices but are also capable of making new ones. Strengthen your support system. Identify people who can listen without judgment, respect your boundaries, and lovingly hold you accountable when old habits return. Important Chapters 00:00:46 — Finding Hope Before Entering Prison 00:01:44 — Severe Depression, Suicidal Thoughts, and Getting Help 00:03:39 — Recognizing the Connection Between Trauma and Choices 00:05:05 — Saying Goodbye to Her Husband at Prison Intake 00:05:59 — The Moment Ranae Decided to Find Herself 00:06:30 — Therapy, Self-Esteem Classes, and Healthier Coping Skills 00:08:35 — Adjusting to Life Inside Federal Prison 00:11:35 — Finding Friendship and Support Behind Bars 00:14:26 — Discovering the Prison Service Dog Program 00:15:43 — The Mental Health Professional Who Challenged Her Thinking 00:18:52 — Escaping the Prison of Your Own Mind 00:20:22 — Coming Home During the COVID-19 Pandemic 00:24:00 — Friendship, Rejection, and Learning Healthy Boundaries 00:27:13 — Advice for Anyone Who Thinks They've Ruined Their Life 00:29:39 — Rebuilding Family Life After Incarceration 00:30:35 — Meeting Cope and Finding a New Purpose 00:34:02 — What Ranae Would Tell Her Younger Self 00:35:00 — Why You Shouldn't Push Away the People Who Love You 00:38:03 — Resilience, Self-Worth, and the Power of Words 00:39:21 — Connecting to Cope and Ranae's Children's Book 00:41:15 — You Are Not the Worst Thing You've Ever Done 00:42:07 — Family Accountability and Continuing the Work Closing CTA Subscribe, Rate, and Review! Subscribe for more inspiring stories. Rate and review us on your favorite podcast platform, or visit our Website: https://goesoninourheads.net/add-your-podcast-reviews #MentalHealthPodcast #MentalHealthAwareness #Grex #DirtySkittles #Podmatch #RanaeVanRoekel #HealingAfterPrison #MentalHealthRecovery #TraumaHealing #ResilienceMatters #SecondChances #PrisonReform #SuicidePrevention #SelfWorth #HealthyCopingSkills #EmotionalResilience #LifeAfterIncarceration #ConnectingToCope #OvercomingShame #KeepDoingTheWork *************************************************************************** If You Need Support, Reach Out If you or someone you know is facing mental health challenges, please don’t hesitate to reach out to a crisis hotline in your area. Remember, it’s OK not to be OK—talking to someone can make all the difference. 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