Would You Choose Motherhood Again If You Knew What You Know Now?

If you could go back to the moment before you became a mother—knowing everything you know now—would you still choose motherhood? For both of us, the answer is yes. But that doesn't mean we'd choose to do everything the same way. In this episode of She’s Not Done, we have an honest conversation about the parts of motherhood nobody can fully prepare you for: losing pieces of yourself, the mental load that never seems to shut off, the pressure to be an “amazing mom,” the moments we wish we'd slowed down for, and the conversations we wish we'd had with our partners before having children. Andrea shares why motherhood has always felt natural to her—even through the difficult parts—while Kouelee opens up about feeling blindsided by the identity shift of becoming a mom and realizing she couldn't be the version of motherhood she had pictured in her head. We also talk about being a “three-hour mom,” working motherhood versus staying home, how differently we're raising our children from the way we were raised, and why being present doesn't have to mean playing babies on the floor for ten hours a day. Then the conversation takes an unexpected turn: Is Kouelee actually done having babies? 👀 And underneath all of it is a complicated truth we don't talk about enough: You can love your children more than anything and still miss who you were before them. You can find motherhood incredibly hard and still choose it all over again. And someone can even regret becoming a parent while deeply loving the children they have. So if you knew about the exhaustion, the worry, the identity shift, the mental load, the guilt—and just how quickly it would all go... Would you still choose motherhood? TIMESTAMPS 00:00 Would We Choose Motherhood Again? 02:30 The Good, Bad & Ugly of Becoming a Mom 05:00 What We Wish We Knew Before Kids 07:30 Conversations Couples Should Have Before Children 10:00 Parenting Differently Than Our Parents 12:30 Breaking Generational Patterns 15:00 Do We Want Our Kids to Be Better Than Us? 17:00 Motherhood, Marriage or Divorce: Where Did You Lose Yourself? 20:00 “I'm a Three-Hour Mom” 22:30 The Pressure to Be an Amazing Mother 24:30 Why Moms and Dads Parent Differently 26:00 Is Kouelee Done Having Kids? 👀 29:00 What Do You Miss About Life Before Motherhood? 31:00 The Mental Load Never Really Ends 33:00 Missing the Moments You Were Too Busy to Enjoy 35:00 Why Motherhood Goes So Fast 36:00 Can You Regret Motherhood and Still Love Your Kids? Thank you for being here! And remember, you are NOT alone and you are Not done. xxx Andrea & Kouelee Here is where you can find us online: Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/shesnotdonepod/ Tiktok: https://www.tiktok.com/@shesnotdonepod Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/@Shesnotdonepod Linktree: https://linktr.ee/Shesnotdonepod?utm_source=ig&utm_medium=social&utm_content=link_in_bio