The B-Movie Boys Podcast

This week, The B-Movie Boys enter genuinely uncharted territory with Ninja Terminator, Godfrey Fucking Ho’s gloriously strange collision of ninjas, crime syndicates, inexplicable plot threads, tiny robot couriers, and one extremely memorable Garfield phone. What starts as a seemingly straightforward quest for the Golden Ninja Warrior quickly becomes a cinematic game of “wait, who the hell is that?” as Jaguar Wong shows up, kicks approximately everyone's ass, and immediately becomes the most important person in the movie simply by being incredibly cool. But the real fun begins when we start pulling apart how Ninja Terminator was actually made. We dig into Godfrey Ho’s cut-and-paste filmmaking machine, the bizarre economics of 1980s Hong Kong martial arts movies, Richard Harrison’s accidental starring role in approximately eleventy-billion ninja movies, and the strange little ecosystem of producers, pseudonyms, and unfinished films that made all of this possible. Add in a camouflage ninja suit that absolutely does not camouflage anything, nonstop martial-arts genital trauma, and an increasingly beloved Garfield phone, and you’ve got one hell of a conversation. The Schlockometer is deployed. The plot is optional. Jaguar is mandatory. Mentioned in this episode: The Uninvited Guest of the Star Fairy (1984) RoboCop (1987) Godzilla, King of the Monsters! (1956) Cobra Versus Ninja (1987) Diamond Ninja Force (1988) Jim Davis Fred Rogers (Mr. Rogers) Joey Tribbiani from Friends Dolly Parton Hwang Jang-lee Bruce Lee Walton Goggins Richard Harrison Jeff Foxworthy Donald J. Trump Bass Pro Shops Garfield Power Rangers Futurama The Shrine of the Silver Monkey from Legends of the Hidden Temple Indiana Jones Willy Wonka The Devil in the White City Our Links: BMovieBoys.com Official Discord Patreon Facebook Instagram

This week, The B-Movie Boys tackle Moron Movies, an 80-ish-minute collection of rapid-fire comedy shorts created by Len Cella, a Pennsylvania fence painter who apparently looked at a Super 8 camera and thought, “Yeah, I can make something with this.” What follows is a parade of cavemen, candy bars, hammers, turds, title cards, and jokes that sometimes land with the precision of a guided missile and sometimes crash directly into the neighbor’s house. Dave and Bryan are joined by Ryan from the Experience Grind podcast, who begins the movie wondering what the hell he’s gotten himself into and ends the episode wondering if Len Cella has fundamentally changed his life. But somewhere between the terrible jokes and increasingly elaborate “Trash Tapes,” the conversation takes a surprisingly sincere turn. The boys dig into Cella's DIY approach, his obsession with making these tiny films, the strange journey that eventually put them in front of Johnny Carson, and the argument that Moron Movies may have been decades ahead of the modern short-form video culture we now carry around in our pockets. Then we attempt to shove all of that into the Schlockometer, because apparently even 18-second comedy sketches need to answer for their crimes. Mentioned in this Episode: Len Cella Movie 43 (2013) Clerks (1994) Pearl (2022) Antichrist (2009) The Last Temptation of Christ (1988) Willem Dafoe Danny Bonaduce David Miscavige Johnny Carson Rod Serling Trey Parker Lyndon B. Johnson Leah Remini The Twilight Zone Saturday Night Live The King of Queens TikTok Vine The Experience Grind Podcast Our Links: BMovieBoys.com Official Discord Patreon Facebook Instagram

This week, The B-Movie Boys travel to Nilbog, a place with absolutely no trolls, several goblins, and one of the most aggressively confusing movie titles in cinematic history. We’re talking Troll 2, Claudio Fragasso’s infamous vegetarian-goblin nightmare, where a family vacation turns into poisoned food, green milk, plant people, questionable acting, and one very determined child with a bladder full of justice. Along the way, we unpack the movie’s bizarre production history, its Italian filmmakers shooting in Utah, the casting of an Alabama dentist as the lead, and the sheer audacity of making a sequel to a movie this thing barely knows exists. But the real surprise is how much we genuinely love this movie. We dig into Best Worst Movie, the documentary that helped transform Troll 2 from an infamous curiosity into a communal cult experience, and why the movie works so much better when you watch it with people who are equally willing to yell at the screen. There’s filmmaking analysis, Schlockometer shenanigans, some extremely questionable food metaphors, and enough “they're eating her, and then they're going to eat me” energy to fuel several more episodes. Troll 2 is certainly one of the B Movies of all time. Mentioned in this episode: Claudio Fragasso Rosella Drudi Troll (1986) Best Worst Movie (2009) George Hardy Freddy Got Fingered (2001) Puss in Boots (2011) Antonio Banderas Iron Man 4 Ghostbusters 3 Back to the Future 4 Charlie and the Chocolate Factory 2 Scott Pilgrim (2010) Bowling for Columbine (2002) Kingpin (1996) Titanic (1997) Spider-Man: Brand New Day (2026) Roger Ebert Taco Bell Taylor Farms IMDb Trivia Harrison Ford “Row, Row, Row Your Boat” Our Links: BMovieBoys.com Official Discord Patreon Facebook Instagram

This week is a little different. We were originally planning to release our episode on Alone in the Dark (2005), but after technical gremlins made the recording unsalvageable (and after spending entirely too much time in the cinematic orbit of Uwe Boll), we decided to crack open the MacGuffin Studios Patreon vault instead. What you're hearing is the very first test run of The B-Movie Boys: the prototype episode where we figured out what this show could become, complete with an early version of the Schlockometer, a slightly different format, and all the enthusiasm of two film nerds who finally got permission to obsess over B-movies. The guinea pig for that experiment? The Toxic Avenger (1984), Troma's gloriously goo-covered cult classic. We revisit Melvin's transformation into Tromaville's mop-wielding mutant hero while diving into practical effects, guerrilla filmmaking, Lloyd Kaufman's anything-goes approach to cinema, and why this bizarre little movie has earned its legendary reputation. Along the way, there are discussions about exploding watermelons, spaghetti dog guts, workout culture satire, and the strange magic that happens when filmmakers have far more passion than money. Think of this as a throwback episode. A Patreon preview. A time capsule from the conceptual birth of The B-Movie Boys. It's rougher around the edges than our current episodes, but the DNA of the show is all here. And for anyone wondering... no, this is definitely not Alone in the Dark. That one will have to wait. Mentioned in this episode: The Toxic Avenger Part II (1989) The Toxic Avenger Part III (1989) Citizen Toxie: The Toxic Avenger IV (2000) Troma Lloyd Kaufman Jennifer Aspinall "Body Talk" by Sandy Farina The Toxic Avenger (2023) Peter Dinklage Bee Movie (2007) Jerry Seinfeld Raiders of the Lost Ark (1981) Marley & Me (2008) Battleship Potemkin (1925) Sergei Eisenstein Men in Black (1997) Vincent D'Onofrio The Cell (2000) Rocky (1976) Tesla Our Links: BMovieBoys.com Official Discord Patreon Facebook Instagram

This week, The B-Movie Boys crank the Resonator to unsafe levels with From Beyond, Stuart Gordon’s gloriously goo-soaked adaptation of an H.P. Lovecraft short story that somehow turns seven pages into ninety minutes of body horror, neon lighting, and aggressively bad decisions. We break down the movie’s wettest moments, debate whether a giant science switch is more satisfying than a demolition plunger, and get unexpectedly fascinated by the production history that sent an American horror movie to Rome in the mid-80s. Along the way they discuss pineal glands, practical effects, Detective Bubba Brownlee, and why this might be one of the horniest cosmic horror movies ever made. The Schlockometer is deployed. Science gets weird. The goo keeps flowing. And everyone involved probably should have stopped turning that machine back on. Mentioned in this Episode: Blade Runner (1982) Dawn of the Dead (1978) Click (2006) The Fly (1986) Pink Flamingos (1972) Titanic (1997) Waterworld (1995) Avatar (2009) James Cameron Captain Planet Don Cheadle It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia Friends H. P. Lovecraft Rami Malek Charles Band Dino De Laurentiis Federico Fellini Christopher Reeve Emeril Lagasse Oscar Mayer Nathan's Famous Our Links: BMovieBoys.com Official Discord Patreon Facebook Instagram