My Child Doesn’t Want to Go: When a Child Refuses Visitation in Texas

What happens when a child refuses to go with the other parent for court-ordered visitation or possession in Texas? Can a child simply decide they do not want to go? What happens when a teenager refuses to get in the car? And is it true that once a child turns 12, they can choose which parent they want to live with? In this episode of The Barrows Firm Podcast, Southlake family law attorney Leslie Barrows discusses one of the more difficult situations divorced and separated parents can face: a child who does not want to spend time with the other parent. Parents sometimes assume that a child's refusal relieves them of their responsibility to follow a custody and possession order. Others have heard that children can choose where they want to live once they reach a certain age. The reality under Texas family law is more complicated. Leslie explains what parents should understand when a child resists or refuses visitation, including the difference between a young child who does not want to leave one parent and an older teenager who strongly objects to going to the other parent's home. She also discusses what Texas law actually says about children expressing their preferences and the role a child's wishes may play in a custody case. The conversation also looks at an important question: Why doesn't the child want to go? Sometimes the explanation may involve ordinary differences between households, including rules about phones, friends, bedtime, homework, discipline, stepparents, new partners, or stepsiblings. In other situations, a child's behavior may raise more serious concerns about what is happening in the other household. Parents need to know how to take legitimate concerns seriously without interrogating a child, coaching the child, or inadvertently creating additional problems in an already contentious custody situation. Leslie also discusses what can happen when one parent believes the other is allowing or encouraging a child to refuse court-ordered possession. Depending on the circumstances, disputes over possession can lead to enforcement proceedings, requests to modify an existing custody or possession order, or other intervention. The situation can become especially complicated with teenagers. A court order does not simply disappear because a child gets older, but the practical realities of dealing with a resistant 16- or 17-year-old can be very different from dealing with a young child. This episode covers: • What Texas parents should know when a child refuses visitation or possession • The common misconception that a child can choose where to live at age 12 • When and how a child's wishes may be considered by a Texas court • What a parent should do when a child refuses to go at an exchange • Differences between younger children and teenagers • Why a child may suddenly resist going to the other parent's home • New spouses, partners, stepsiblings, household rules, and discipline • Serious allegations involving safety, abuse, neglect, or substance abuse • Documenting concerns without coaching a child • Enforcement of possession and access orders • When recurring problems may lead to a custody modification • When parents should talk with a Texas family law attorney Every custody situation is different, and questions involving possession, access, enforcement, and modification depend heavily on the particular court order and facts involved. The Barrows Firm represents clients in divorce, child custody, child support, modification, enforcement, and other Texas family law matters in Southlake and throughout Tarrant County and surrounding communities. Learn more about The Barrows Firm and attorney Leslie Barrows on The Barrows Firm website. This podcast is provided for general educational and informational purposes and is not legal advice. Listening to the program does not create an attorney-client relationship.