The Centerville Grace Podcast

"We want to create a family where the kids want to be with us even when they don't have to be." Tony and Karen have carried that Andy Stanley line for a decade — but how do you actually build a home your kids come back to? And if you're the grown kid now, how do you become someone your own parents want to invite in? In the final week of Parenting Is Hard, Pastor Tony Miltenberger introduces the Homecoming Principle: grace makes room for peace, and peace makes a home. We naturally gravitate toward places of grace and peace — and away from judgment, shame, conflict, and anger. Starting in Genesis 2, Tony shows that God wrote leaving into the design: sending our kids out of the house isn't a failure, it's the goal. Then he walks through the four seasons of parenting as roles on a football team — quarterback, coach, general manager, and fan — and the hard truth that you don't get to decide when your role changes. Along the way: why no one wants to play for an angry coach, Caleb's new driver's license and Ohio's one-passenger rule, what the Hebrew word for "honor" (kabed, "weighty") actually asks of kids and parents, why "we're not friends, we're friendly" with his own parents, the amnesty dinners he started with his 17-year-old at Skyline, and why you can't send yourself an invitation — you can only become the kind of person worth inviting. It all lands in Hebrews 11: Abraham lived in a tent, never saw the full promise, and still knew where home was. Parenting at its core is an act of faith. And before we ever made a home for our kids, God made a home for us. We don't give our kids grace because they've earned it; we give it because it was first given to us. Parenting is hard, and unfortunately, none of us gets it right all the time. But God has given us wisdom for the journey. Parenting Is Hard is for parents, grandparents, future parents, and anyone helping shape the next generation as we learn to build strong relationships, lead with purpose, and point the children in our lives toward their Heavenly Father. Message 6 (series finale) in the series "Parenting Is Hard"Pastor Tony Miltenberger | Centerville Grace Church | Oct. 18, 2026

Who is on your parenting team? Pastor Tony Miltenberger asked his own family what the hardest part of having him as a dad is, and they did not hold back: "You're gone a lot." "You're a lot." "You're a little bit of a bully." His response: all of it is true, and it doesn't make him a good parent or a bad parent. It makes him human. Parenting is hard because people are hard, and we were never meant to raise children alone. In Week 5 of Parenting Is Hard, Tony introduces the Teamwork Principle: great teams raise great teammates. Starting in Deuteronomy 6, he shows that God's instructions for raising kids were given to a whole community, not to isolated households. From there it gets practical and honest: why the more complicated your feelings are about your child, the more people you need on your team; the golf-course conversation where he told his son about generations of addiction in their family; why your marriage has to come before your kids; "covenant, calling, assignment"; what to do about the people on your team you didn't choose; the five-adults-per-child ratio; and the Emotional Intensity Scale, a simple tool for knowing when the problem is you and not your kid. Whether you're in the thick of the parenting years, launched your kids long ago, don't have kids yet, or are a student yourself, this message is for you. Somebody's kids need you on their team, and God wants to lead yours. Parenting is hard, and unfortunately, none of us gets it right all the time. But God has given us wisdom for the journey. Parenting Is Hard is for parents, grandparents, future parents, and anyone helping shape the next generation as we learn to build strong relationships, lead with purpose, and point the children in our lives toward their Heavenly Father. Message 5 in the series "Parenting Is Hard"Pastor Tony Miltenberger | Centerville Grace Church | Oct. 11, 2026

In Week 4 of Parenting Is Hard, Pastor Dave sits down with Justin Gravitt — Navigators Church Ministries missionary, disciple-maker for 27 years, and "the most intentional guy I've ever met" — to talk about the intentional side of parenting. Justin and his wife Kristen sum up their whole philosophy in three lines: we show the way, they choose the way, and we love them either way. From there it gets practical: the difference between Christian parenting and discipling your kids (a hot take), the non-negotiables in their home, a family mission statement their four-year-old memorized, one-on-one breakfasts in the Word every school day, Sabbath, screen time, what happens when mom and dad disagree, and the "ice cream consequence" that teaches kids what grace feels like. Whether you have toddlers, teenagers, or no kids yet, this is a conversation worth having at your own table. Parenting is hard, and unfortunately, none of us gets it right all the time. But God has given us wisdom for the journey. Parenting Is Hard is for parents, grandparents, future parents, and anyone helping shape the next generation as we learn to build strong relationships, lead with purpose, and point the children in our lives toward their Heavenly Father. Message 4 in the series "Parenting Is Hard" Pastor Dave Holmes with guest Justin Gravitt | Centerville Grace Church | Oct. 4, 2026

How do you discipline your kids? If your honest answer is "I have no idea," you're in good company — that's Pastor Dave's answer too. But the Bible has more to say about discipline than "how to make it stop." In Week 3 of Parenting Is Hard, Dave tackles the hardest part of parenting: the children. Starting from what discipline actually is — training toward maturity, not just punishment — he unpacks the "punishment trap" (mistaking stopping behavior for changing behavior), why yelling "Knock it off!" works just often enough to keep us doing it, and the four-step cycle Paul gives Timothy that maps almost perfectly onto research on effective parenting: teach, rebuke, correct, train. Along the way: the Iron Man and the hammer, a chocolate lesson on losing your temper, three things Dave wishes he'd known before ever handing out a consequence, and an honest answer to the question everyone was waiting for — what about spanking? Good discipline requires self-discipline. It's hard. But you can do hard things, parents. Parenting is hard, and unfortunately, none of us gets it right all the time. But God has given us wisdom for the journey. Parenting Is Hard is for parents, grandparents, future parents, and anyone helping shape the next generation as we learn to build strong relationships, lead with purpose, and point the children in our lives toward their Heavenly Father. Message 3 in the series "Parenting Is Hard"Pastor Dave Holmes | Centerville Grace Church | Sept. 27, 2026

Parenting is hard, and unfortunately, none of us gets it right all the time. But God has given us wisdom for the journey. Parenting Is Hard is for parents, grandparents, future parents, and anyone helping shape the next generation as we learn to build strong relationships, lead with purpose, and point the children in our lives toward their Heavenly Father. Message 2 in the series "Parenting Is Hard" Pastor Dave Holmes Sept. 20, 2026