You Can Love People and Still Need Less Access to Them

Send us Fan Mail What if someone doesn’t have to be toxic, terrible, or completely removed from your life for you to realize they need less access to you? We’ve turned boundaries into an all-or-nothing conversation: either someone has full access to us, or we cut them off completely. But emotionally mature relationships are often much more nuanced than that. In this episode of The Healing Poetic Podcast, Keya explores what it means to love someone while changing the amount of access they have to your time, energy, vulnerability, personal life, and emotional space. We’re talking about longtime friendships, family relationships, changing seasons, privacy versus secrecy, accepting people’s limitations, respecting other people’s boundaries—and recognizing when a relationship may still belong in your life, just not in the same position it once occupied. Because longevity doesn’t automatically equal intimacy. Forgiveness doesn’t automatically restore access. And you don’t always need a villain to justify changing your participation in a relationship. Sometimes love says: “I care about you deeply. But this is as close as I can peacefully and authentically stand.” Less access isn’t always punishment. Sometimes it’s wisdom. Support the show