Did You Lose Your Libido or Never Get to Know It? Desire After 45 with Dr. Lori Brotto

Come find me at the National Menopause Show, October 17–18, 2026, at the International Centre in Mississauga. I’ll be recording Transforming 45 from the show floor. Use TRANSFORM45 for 15% off tickets: https://nationalmenopauseshow.com/ Have you really lost your libido, or were you never given the space, language or permission to discover your desire in the first place? In this honest conversation, Lisa sits down with psychologist and sexual-health researcher Dr. Lori Brotto, author of Better Sex Through Mindfulness. Together, they unpack the myths women have inherited about desire and how exhaustion, stress, pain, medication and relationship context can shape our sexual lives. We talk about knowing your body, what menopause can change, preparing for conversations with a healthcare practitioner, and what to say when your concerns are dismissed. We also explore how partners can talk about sex without making one person responsible for fixing everything. Maybe pleasure in midlife begins with getting curious about who we are now. Sexual health is health, and this conversation gives us language for something many of us have carried quietly. What listeners will take away: Desire can depend on what is happening within us, around us and in our relationships. Knowing what feels good helps us communicate what we want. Pain, discomfort and changes in desire are legitimate topics for healthcare. A conversation with a partner can start with: “I heard something that made me curious about us.” Chapters: 00:00 Did we lose desire—or never get to know it? 01:33 What sexual desire actually is 03:13 Have I ever felt desire in my own skin? 06:33 What “I’ve lost my libido” can mean 08:34 Sex education, agency and inherited stories 12:38 Knowing your body and what feels good 15:10 Hormones, menopause and sexual comfort 17:38 Why a blood test cannot tell the whole story 18:58 Shame, self-discovery and support 22:32 Midlife women and the demand for better healthcare 27:22 Preparing to talk to your healthcare provider 28:42 Sexual health is health 30:15 Responding when your concerns are dismissed 31:53 Alcohol, sleep and arousal 33:40 Talking with a partner about timing and sex 35:53 How partners’ bodies and roles can change too 38:22 A first step toward sexual self-awareness 40:22 How to begin the conversation with your partner 41:08 What Lisa is taking away CONNECT WITH LORI Website and books: https://www.loribrotto.com/ Research lab: https://brottolab.med.ubc.ca/ CONNECT WITH LISA https://liberatedmenopause.ca/ Instagram: @lboate Transforming 45 is a space for honest conversations about midlife transformation. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices