Not in My House

Send Lauri a message Certified life coach and culture strategist Joni Woods spent years being told who she wasn't:  not smart enough, not leadership material, only useful for how she looked. After a divorce, a devastating house fire, and a full rebuild of her confidence, Joni discovered that boundaries,  not performance, were the doorway to belonging. In this conversation, Joni and Lauri trace the line from a coaching program that told a 17-year-old Joni she'd "never be good at this," through 15 years of marriage where she stayed "the problem," to the divorce that forced her to finally ask what she wanted instead of guessing what everyone else did. Joni shares how she rebuilt her confidence one small proof at a time, why she now teaches boundaries as a house you get to control the entrance to, and how choosing kindness over bitterness every single day became the most radical form of leadership she knows. If you've ever performed your way into someone else's approval and lost yourself doing it, this one's for you. Key Takeaways True leadership grows people; it doesn't diagnose them and walk away. Spending years guessing what someone wants from us builds exhaustion, not connection. Rock bottom can be the moment you stop being "the problem" and start setting the example for yourself, and for whoever's watching you. Confidence and humility aren't opposites. We can know exactly what we're capable of and still stay teachable. The boxes people build for us (pretty, agreeable, obedient) are rarely about who we are. They're about what makes them comfortable. Choosing our response (like kindness over bitterness) is the one thing that stays entirely ours, no matter what’s been taken away. Molding someone into who you think they should be is different from mentoring them into who they truly are. I’ve written a new book, Land Your Message, and I'd love for you to be a part of getting it into the world. Back the Indiegogo campaign, grab early access, or share it with someone who needs it: https://www.indiegogo.com/projects/laurismith/land-your-message The Speaker Alter Ego Quiz Take the Speaker Alter Ego quiz to find out which protective mask hides your natural radiance so you can learn how to get present, connect deeply, and share your vision when it matters most! https://voice-matters.com/speaker-alter-ego-quiz/ If you love this show and you’re looking for some new shows to fill your queue, head over to feministpodcasterscollective.com to explore everything FPC has to offer.  Support the show Thank you so much for listening! Take the free Speaker Alter Ego Quiz to find out which protective mask is hiding your wild, untamed radiance. https://voice-matters.com/speaker-alter-ego-quiz/ Follow me on: Instagram https://www.instagram.com/voice_matters_llc/ Linkedin https://www.linkedin.com/in/lauri-smith-voice-matters/ YouTube  https://www.youtube.com/@voicematters9646