We Gotta Thing - Exploring Non-Monogamy

In our recent workshop at the Libertine event in Scottsdale, Mrs. Jones and I led a discussion about what it takes to stay relevant and exciting to other couples. The overwhelming consensus was that the secret is keeping your relationship fresh. But what does that really mean? For us, it means breaking away from the traditional marriage models we grew up watching, where couples often settled into predictable routines and family roles. Instead, we've learned to take ownership of our relationship, prioritize each other, stay united as a team, learn to say no to outside expectations, and stop caring so much about what others think. It's about keeping things fresh, exciting, and focused on each other rather than allowing life and responsibilities to make the relationship stagnant. We call our current relationship our fourth marriage, even though we've been married to each other the entire time. Our first marriage was about being newlyweds, raising kids, and building careers. The second came with the sexual freedom of an empty nest, the third was our exploration of non-monogamy, and now we're navigating dominant/submissive power dynamics together. Each evolution has brought new challenges, vulnerability, excitement, and opportunities to trust one another in ways we never imagined. Is reinventing your relationship easy? Absolutely not. It can be confusing, uncomfortable, and sometimes feel like more trouble than it's worth. But the rewards are undeniable: renewed energy, deeper connection, and a fresh appreciation for each other. So, what marriage are you on? Maybe it's time to stop settling into the familiar, embrace the challenge of evolving together, and discover what your next marriage could look like. Discover more Libertine Events here! Request a Black Friday WGT Community Promo Code and get a 75% discount on our Premium Quarterly Membership! All WGT Community members have access to a special Desire Resorts discount promo code. Join the We Gotta Thing Info Hub for free on our website!

In this episode with Meshai from Expansive Connection we discuss something we think just about everyone in the lifestyle has experienced at some point: the fear of being judged. The reality is, we all make judgments about people. It's just part of being human. But sometimes those judgments say more about our own insecurities than they do about the people we're judging. One of the things we love about the lifestyle is that it gives us so many opportunities to be curious, not just about other people, but about ourselves. We're constantly navigating new experiences, meeting different people, and sometimes stepping outside our comfort zones. And when feelings like insecurity, jealousy, or fear of rejection show up, we have a choice. We can let those feelings drive our reactions, or we can get curious about where they're coming from. The biggest takeaway from this conversation is that when we spend less time judging and more time trying to understand, we open ourselves up to better connections, stronger relationships, and a whole lot of personal growth. Learn more about Expansive Connection Coaching Want to try the We Gotta Thing Community? Message Mr Jones here and request a promo code! Or visit the We Gotta Thing website

Over the years, we've received countless questions and podcast topic suggestions from listeners, but not every question lends itself to an entire episode. That's one reason we started hosting our weekly Ask Us Anything Friday livestreams in the We Gotta Thing community. Now we're bringing that same open, honest, and sometimes unpredictable conversation to the podcast! In this episode, we tackle some of your most frequently asked questions. We explore Mrs. Jones's attraction to women, whether we've ever broken a hard-and-fast lifestyle rule and regretted it, and how we approach conversations when meeting new couples. We also discuss navigating unexpected anxiety during play and the delicate question of whether to share our non-monogamous lifestyle with close friends who are curious about the secret to our sexual happiness. We talk about whether a previously declared "pants-on" friendship can evolve back into a sexual connection, what might prompt that change, and how to navigate it together. We also share our favorite ways to gracefully escape a conversation, whether we prefer planning a play date around a specific fantasy or letting things unfold organically, and how our perspectives on aging and attraction have evolved since we first explored the subject back in 2019. As always, our goal isn't to provide a one-size-fits-all answer, but to share what we've learned along our journey and encourage you to think about what works best in your own relationship. And who knows? If you enjoy this format, Ask Us Anything might just become a regular part of the podcast!

In this episode with Catherine from Expansive Connection Coaching we talk about how Menopause has a way of touching just about everything—and your relationship definitely doesn't get a pass. As estrogen declines, the instinct to take care of everyone, smooth the edges, keep the peace, and put other people's needs ahead of our own can start to change. Sometimes dramatically. Suddenly there's a desire for more space, clearer boundaries, less caretaking, and maybe even a little "I've got no more fucks to give." That can be confusing and scary for both partners, especially when it feels like the rules of the relationship are changing without anyone agreeing to change them. But maybe menopause isn't breaking anything. Maybe it's shining a very bright light on the places where we've compromised ourselves, become too dependent on one another, or stopped showing up authentically. And if that sounds familiar to those of us practicing ENM, it should. Non-monogamy has a funny way of exposing the fault lines in a relationship, and menopause can do exactly the same thing. The question becomes what we do once we see them. Instead of asking, "How do I get my wife—or my old relationship—back?" maybe we get curious about what this transition is trying to teach us. It's an opportunity for both partners to listen differently, own their stuff, create some intentional space, renegotiate expectations, and figure out who they want to be together in this next chapter. The good news is that those of us who've navigated an ENM journey may already have some of the tools. Because the goal isn't to survive menopause and somehow get everything back to the way it was. It's to build the relationship we didn't know was possible. Expansive Connection Coaching Wise Power by Pope and Wurlitzer- Discover the Liberating Power of Menopause to Awaken Authority, Purpose and Belonging I'm Hot (Ode to Menopause) Wild and Wise Women's Retreat Join the We Gotta Thing Community

Non-monogamy can be about much more than sex with other people. For us, it has enriched our relationship, created meaningful friendships, and changed the way we move through everyday life. In this episode, we explore how the lessons we've learned through ethical non-monogamy show up in our relationships with family, friends, neighbors, co-workers, and even when meeting strangers. We discuss the important distinction between being honest about who you are as a couple and oversharing the private details of your sex life. We've learned how to define our relationship on our own terms rather than allowing family, friends, religion, age, or societal expectations to define it for us. Mentioned in this episode: Contact Mr Jones for a promo code to try the We Gotta Thing community for three months! Book your Desire Resorts trip here Music used with permission from Luxe Music Studios: We Gotta Thing Playtime Dressed to Undress