What Are You Doing in Denmark?

What does it mean to grow up in Denmark and still be treated like a foreigner? In this episode, Derek sits down with Lena Rexhepi, who arrived in Denmark from Kosovo as a nine-year-old refugee in 1999. Now the author of But Where Are You Really From? Foreign There, Foreign Here: From Kosovo to Denmark, Lena shares her story of fleeing war, rebuilding her life, and navigating what it means to belong to two places without always feeling completely at home in either. Lena opens up about the lasting impact of childhood displacement, the changing political rhetoric around refugees and immigrants in Denmark, and the everyday experiences of racism and othering that can follow you even when you've grown up here, learned the language, and built a successful career. From having to explain her name in professional meetings to confronting assumptions about her background on dates and at dinner parties, Lena explores how seemingly innocent questions can carry deeper messages about who belongs. She also shares what she genuinely loves about Danish culture, the differences she sees between Denmark and Kosovo, and why identity doesn't always fit neatly into one box. This is a conversation about migration, identity, resilience, and the difference between living in a country and feeling at home in it. In this episode: What Lena remembers about fleeing the Kosovo War as a child How Denmark welcomed her family — and how her experience changed as she grew up Why “Where are you really from?” can be a loaded question Racism, stereotypes, and being othered in everyday life Navigating identity, dating, names, and professional life in Denmark What Lena appreciates about Danish culture, despite its contradictions What it means to be told to “go back home” when you're not sure where home is Lena's memoir is But Where Are You Really From? Foreign There, Foreign Here: From Kosovo to Denmark Order it here: https://lenarexhepi.com/about-the-book/ Chapters 00:00 Introduction 01:01 Lena's story: From Kosovo to Denmark 02:01 Fleeing the Kosovo War 04:19 Writing about childhood trauma 06:14 Finding refuge in Denmark 09:00 Denmark's changing attitudes toward refugees 11:24 Everyday racism and stereotypes 12:16 Being judged by your background 15:56 The subtle ways we make people feel like outsiders 16:08 Having to explain your name 18:00 Choosing a name that fits in 20:20 How othering affects dating and relationships 23:46 Living between Danish and Albanian identities 24:10 What Lena appreciates about Danish culture 26:07 Danish directness vs. Albanian warmth 29:00 Identity, labels, and the meaning of belonging 32:00 Being told to “go back home” 34:24 Class, privilege, and belonging within Denmark 35:37 What Lena would tell her nine-year-old self 🎟️ Get tickets for Derek and Conrad's English Stand Up Comedy Show on 26th November ➡️ HERE 📺 Watch on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLFCSH6KqKooZmSx1GJu9CWZYjX8esjl2F 📢 Send your questions and/or comments. voice: https://www.speakpipe.com/waydid email: [email protected] 👉 Remember to tell your friends about the podcast. 👀 More living in Denmark tips: https://instagram.com/waydidpod Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Denmark is supposed to be good at work-life balance. Five weeks of paid vacation, a culture that encourages you to switch off, and a whole summer when it feels like the country collectively disappears. So why is it still so hard to relax? This week, Derek and Brooke talk about the work habits they brought with them to Denmark, and the ways they've struggled to leave them behind. From hoarding vacation days and working through the summer shutdown to overloading a holiday with so many activities that it stops being relaxing, they unpack what it actually takes to slow down. They also get into the unwritten rules of Danish workplace culture, why working longer doesn't necessarily mean working better, and whether ambition and standing out can sometimes clash with the Danish preference for fitting in. Along the way, they answer a listener's question about navigating expectations, office humor, and career goals as an international employee. Because sometimes, learning to make Denmark make sense means learning when to close your laptop and leave it closed. In this episode: Why Americans and other internationals can struggle with Denmark's work-life balance What to do with those five weeks of paid vacation (and why you should actually use them) How the Danish summer shutdown affects work and planning Why filling your free time with activities isn't always the same as relaxing The unwritten rules of Danish workplace culture Ambition, productivity, and the pressure to fit in Have a story about learning to switch off in Denmark? We'd love to hear it. Get in touch through our SpeakPipe! 🎟️ Get tickets for Derek and Conrad's English Stand Up Comedy Show on 26th November ➡️ HERE 📺 Watch on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLFCSH6KqKooZmSx1GJu9CWZYjX8esjl2F 📢 Send your questions and/or comments. voice: https://www.speakpipe.com/waydid email: [email protected] 👉 Remember to tell your friends about the podcast. 👀 More living in Denmark tips: https://instagram.com/waydidpod Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

What if the problem with modern convenience is that it works too well? Comedians Anders Morgenstierne and Jefferson Bond join Derek to unpack why Denmark can feel slow, strange, and even inconvenient at first, and why that might actually be the point.Sparked by a question from a YouTube viewer, the conversation explores the trade-offs behind on-demand delivery, apps, and round-the-clock convenience. Along the way, the trio shares stories about potato week, delivery work, package mishaps, and the eye-watering cost of Danish taxis. Beneath the jokes about Spider-Man, Amazon, and a very suspicious Titanic theory, there’s a thoughtful question: when everything becomes effortless, what do we lose? This episode is for anyone living in Denmark, considering a move, or curious about the balance between convenience, community, and how we treat the people who make our deliveries possible. Anders Morgenstierne: Get tickets for Anders's Show HERE Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/andersmorgenstierne TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@andersmorgenstierne Jefferson Bond: Get tickets for Jeff's Show HERE Instagram: https://instagram.com/jeffersonbondcomedy TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/jeffersonbondcomedy Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/Jefferson.A.Bond/ 00:00 — The convenience question from a YouTube viewer 00:30 — Meet comedians Annis Moynstein and Jefferson Bond 01:27 — Is Denmark inconvenient—or just different? 01:46 — Potato break and the convenience of doing things yourself 03:51 — The hidden human cost of instant delivery 05:14 — Spider-Man, responsibility, and a delivery detour 06:38 — Amazon, instant gratification, and wanting more 07:59 — What happens when we stop going out? 09:51 — Delivery work, schedules, and who pays the price 11:20 — Courier stories from the night shift 13:38 — Package pickups, secondhand shopping, and delivery doubts 16:54 — DIY culture and why slower services may benefit workers 17:52 — The Danish taxi-price rant 19:13 — A comic detour into Irish stereotypes and Titanic theories 23:20 — Up Festival show mentions and the final thought 🎟️ Get tickets for Derek and Conrad's English Stand Up Comedy Show on 26th November ➡️ HERE 📺 Watch on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLFCSH6KqKooZmSx1GJu9CWZYjX8esjl2F 📢 Send your questions and/or comments. voice: https://www.speakpipe.com/waydid email: [email protected] 👉 Remember to tell your friends about the podcast. 👀 More living in Denmark tips: https://instagram.com/waydidpod Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Why do Danish friends sometimes seem reluctant to invite you into their homes? This week, we answer a listener question from a Lebanese expat in Copenhagen who loves hosting dinners for friends but rarely gets invited back by their Danish friends. Is it a Danish cultural difference, a question of friendship groups, or simply a matter of personality? Derek, Conrad and returning guest, Kriti Prajapati talk about hosting, Danish friendship circles, language barriers, cultural references, social media FOMO, getting rejected by friends, and why building friendships in Denmark can sometimes require a little more intention. Plus: how to actually spend time with your Danish friends outside the usual group setting and our increasingly questionable advice for getting a Dane to invite you over. More of Kriti: Tickets for Kriti's show at Up Festival: https://upfestival.dk/om/komikere/kriti-prajapati Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/kriticalcomedy/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@KritiPrajapati Other WAYDID episodes with Kriti: https://pod.link/1704607322/episode/NjczMjdkOWE0N2JmOTIwNTRlMDZkN2Nm 00:00 Welcome to WAYDID + Kriti returns 00:43 Why don’t my Danish friends invite me over? 02:15 Is Danish hosting actually different? 04:38 The language barrier nobody thinks about 08:37 Why cultural references matter in friendship 11:45 Danish friends already have established friend groups 13:32 Social media makes feeling left out worse 14:02 Should you mix Danish and international friends? 17:25 Are Danes less spontaneous about socializing? 19:19 Do Danes have different kinds of friends? 21:37 When should you stop trying with a friend? 22:38 Is this just a Copenhagen thing? 23:05 Why Danes schedule doing nothing 23:55 How to actually get closer to Danish friends 25:20 How to make a Dane invite you over 26:48 Maybe it’s not a Danish problem 27:56 Kriti’s comedy festival show 28:46 Thanks for listening! 🎟️ Get tickets for Derek and Conrad's English Stand Up Comedy Show on 26th November ➡️ HERE 📺 Watch on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLFCSH6KqKooZmSx1GJu9CWZYjX8esjl2F 📢 Send your questions and/or comments. voice: https://www.speakpipe.com/waydid email: [email protected] 👉 Remember to tell your friends about the podcast. 👀 More living in Denmark tips: https://instagram.com/waydidpod Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Is Denmark really as open-minded and progressive as it seems, or is Danish culture also deeply conformist? In this episode of What Are You Doing in Denmark, Derek Hartman is joined by Anders Morgenstierne and Jefferson Bond to answer a listener’s question about fitting in, Danish social norms, and the tension between individuality and conformity in Denmark. The conversation explores Janteloven, Danish humor, high-trust society, quiet zones, public behavior, supermarkets, Copenhagen vs. the Danish countryside, and what it can feel like to experience Denmark as an outsider. Plus, plenty of discussion about the strange little cultural rules that make Denmark both incredibly comfortable and occasionally confusing for internationals. Anders Morgenstierne: Get tickets for Anders's Show HERE Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/andersmorgenstierne TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@andersmorgenstierne Jefferson Bond: Get tickets for Jeff's Show HERE Instagram: https://instagram.com/jeffersonbondcomedy TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/jeffersonbondcomedy Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/Jefferson.A.Bond/ 00:00 Intro: Is Denmark Really Progressive? 01:07 Meet Anas & Jefferson 02:03 A Listener Asks: Why Is Denmark So Conformist? 03:05 The Danish Supermarket Experience 04:38 Progressive Denmark vs. Conformist Denmark 06:02 How Denmark Makes You Soft 07:00 Is Denmark Really That Progressive? 08:14 The Pressure to “Fit In” 09:15 The Danish Social Rulebook 10:03 Why We Love the Quiet Zone 12:00 Danish Train Etiquette 13:00 Don’t Play Music Out Loud on Public Transport 14:01 The Velcro Shoe Defense 14:55 Is It Conformity or Danish Culture? 16:01 High Trust Society & Following the Rules 17:01 Denmark Is a Quokka 18:02 Janteloven: Taking People Down a Peg 19:03 Copenhagen vs. the Danish Countryside 20:01 The Great Nykøbing Debate 21:02 Speaking Danish & Trying to Fit In 22:06 Can You Be Yourself in Denmark? 23:04 Is There a Middle Ground? 24:01 Why Danish Supermarkets Feel So Different 26:00 Netto, Self-Checkout & Danish Efficiency 27:00 “Uniform and Joyless” 28:02 When Danish Systems Break 29:04 The Joy of Supermarkets Abroad 30:01 The Final Verdict for Marcus 30:37 Up Festival & Where to Find the Guests 🎟️ Get tickets for Derek and Conrad's English Stand Up Comedy Show on 26th November ➡️ HERE 📺 Watch on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLFCSH6KqKooZmSx1GJu9CWZYjX8esjl2F 📢 Send your questions and/or comments. voice: https://www.speakpipe.com/waydid email: [email protected] 👉 Remember to tell your friends about the podcast. 👀 More living in Denmark tips: https://instagram.com/waydidpod Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.