167. Why Do I Keep Getting in My Own Way? | Understanding Self-Sabotage

In this episode of Why Do I Do This? with Johnny Lawrence, I explore one of the most misunderstood patterns in human behaviour: self-sabotage. What if you're not actually trying to sabotage yourself? What if the behaviour you're calling self-sabotage is actually an attempt to self-soothe, pulling you back to something familiar and comfortable when fear or uncertainty feels uncomfortable? I explore how behavioural loops, identity, familiarity, and fear can keep us repeating patterns we know aren't helping us, and why success can sometimes feel more threatening than failure. Most importantly, I look at how curiosity and self-awareness can help us interrupt those patterns and develop healthier responses to discomfort. Takeaways 👉 Self-sabotage may actually be self-soothing. We often return to familiar behaviours because they help us regulate discomfort, even when they don't serve us. 👉 Familiar doesn't always mean healthy. We can become more comfortable with what we know than with what we actually want. 👉 Fear can sit underneath self-sabotaging behaviour. Change, success and uncertainty can all trigger protective responses. 👉 Your behaviour can become a loop. Triggers create familiar responses, which create familiar outcomes, until you notice the pattern. 👉 Curiosity creates choice. Instead of asking, “Why am I doing this to myself?”, ask, “What is this behaviour trying to do for me?” JOIN THE BOOK WAITLIST https://www.johnnylawrence.co.uk/book  Website www.johnnylawrence.co.uk Johnny’s Instagram https://www.instagram.com/johnnylawrenceuk/?hl=en  Podcast Instagram https://www.instagram.com/whydoidothisofficial/?hl=en  The Slavey of Addiction Documentary https://youtu.be/8j3Nq_lcFlY?si=6I0kXppX9prFFoin