Say the Word: Suicide, Survival & the People Left Behind with CALM’s Michael Jarvis

Say the Word: Suicide, Survival & the People Left Behind with CALM’s Michael Jarvis What happens when we stop being afraid to say the word suicide? This week, Rosie is joined by Michael Jarvis from CALM (Campaign Against Living Miserably) for a conversation about suicide, the people left behind, and why talking openly could help save a life. Michael comes to the conversation from both sides. He works in suicide prevention, but he also knows the devastation of suicide loss personally. In 2016, his close friend Matt died by suicide at just 23. Matt was the loud one, the funny one, the friend who filled a room and grabbed life by the horns. His death landed like a bomb in their friendship group and changed the course of Michael’s life. Rosie and Michael talk about the questions that can haunt those left behind: Were there signs? Should I have known? Could I have done something? They explore the guilt, anger, confusion and isolation that can make suicide bereavement so uniquely complicated, as well as the unexpected ways grief can reshape friendships and futures. They also tackle one of the biggest fears around suicide: if we ask someone directly whether they are suicidal, could we put the idea into their head? Michael explains why asking the question can instead create a safe space for someone to tell the truth, and why you don't need to be a mental health professional to notice that something isn't right, start a conversation and help someone find support. From talking side-by-side rather than face-to-face, to choosing the right moment, creating a safety plan and knowing what to do if somebody says, “Actually, no, I'm not okay,” this is a practical conversation as much as an emotional one. Michael also shares the tools and support available through CALM for people experiencing suicidal thoughts, those worried about someone they love, and those bereaved by suicide. And, because this is still Widowed AF, there is dark humour, marathon chat, an unexpected cat appearance and plenty of swearing along the way. Most importantly, this episode is about bringing suicide out of the darkness and into conversation. Because sometimes asking an uncomfortable question could be the beginning of somebody feeling less alone. Support CALM Throughout September, Widowed AF is taking part in CALM’s Stay Tuned campaign, raising money to support its suicide prevention work. If you’d like to donate, you can support Rosie’s fundraiser here: Rosie’s CALM fundraiser:https://www.justgiving.com/page/rosie-moss-1 For information, practical resources and support from CALM: CALM:https://www.thecalmzone.net/ Content warning: This episode contains frank discussion of suicide, suicidal thoughts and suicide bereavement. If you are affected by anything discussed, please seek support. In an immediate emergency, call 999.