<p><strong>From Marine to Somatic Intimacy Guide: Andre Lazarus on Presence Over Performance</strong></p><p>Host Andy Grant interviews Andre Lazarus, a former US Marine turned somatic intimacy guide and surrogate partner therapist featured on the UK series Virgin Island. Andre describes serving in Afghanistan, leading others, and later being drawn into intimacy work after partners reflected its therapeutic impact, alongside unlearning rigid ideas of masculinity. He critiques the manosphere as often dangerous but notes it offers community and conversation to struggling young men. </p><p>Andre defines somatic work as body-based healing—through breath, touch, and nervous-system regulation—often more effective than talk alone for physical or sexual trauma, and discusses common male intimacy issues like rapid ejaculation, erectile concerns, dissociation, and over-focusing on a partner’s pleasure. He emphasizes breathing as a foundational practice, compassion in difficult family relationships, that surrogate partner therapy is a triadic model with a licensed therapist, and that “intimacy is not performance, its presence,” “simple doesn’t mean easy,” and “there is no one way of being a man.”</p><p>00:00 Surrogate Therapy Explained<br />00:43 Meet Andre Lazarus<br />01:32 From Marines to Intimacy<br />03:28 Masculinity and Unlearning<br />07:35 Vulnerability Myths<br />09:13 Manosphere Pull Explained<br />14:34 Somatics Defined<br />16:18 Men’s Hidden Intimacy Struggles<br />20:45 Breath as First Practice<br />24:03 Healing Father Wounds<br />27:05 Virgin Island and Surrogacy<br />29:57 Going Public With the Work<br />32:42 Boundaries With Clients<br />34:33 Never Too Late to Grow<br />36:01 Connect With Andre<br />37:39 Final Takeaways on Presence</p><p><strong>Connect with Andre</strong><br />Andre Lazarus — <a href="https://coming-closer.com/" rel="ugc noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">https://coming-closer.com/</a><br />Instagram — <a href="https://www.instagram.com/comingcloserwithandre/" rel="ugc noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">https://www.instagram.com/comingcloserwithandre/</a><br />Highlights of Virgin Island — <a href="https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLbnU9iq6kGBFORNkmpVkNhQ6KoZVkf04T" rel="ugc noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLbnU9iq6kGBFORNkmpVkNhQ6KoZVkf04T</a></p><p><strong>Connect with Andy:</strong><br />Join other like-minded men in the Authentic AF Community | <a href="https://www.realmenfeel.org/group" rel="ugc noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">https://www.realmenfeel.org/group</a><br />Instagram | @realmenfeelshow &amp; @theandygrant<br />Andy Grant | <a href="https://theandygrant.com" rel="ugc noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">https://theandygrant.com</a> for coaching, healing, and book info!<br />Real Men Feel | <a href="https://realmenfeel.org" rel="ugc noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">https://realmenfeel.org</a><br />YouTube | <a href="https://youtube.com/realmenfeel" rel="ugc noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">https://youtube.com/realmenfeel</a><br /></p><p>#RealMenFeel ep 406</p>