The Angry Therapist Podcast

This episode starts with a story about peeing on himself… and somehow turns into a conversation about masculinity, emotional safety, relationships, and rebuilding love after loss. John records this one off the cuff from a coffee shop in Costa Rica and reflects on the traits he once saw as flaws, the surprising depth that can happen in men’s groups, and a relationship question that’s changing the way he shows up in marriage. He also shares why he believes some relationships need to “die” in order for something more honest to be rebuilt. In this episode: • Why impulsiveness and intensity may not be the problem • The question John asked a men’s group: “How is your heart?” • How emotional safety changes the way men open up • Why some long-term relationships stop evolving • “What I need” vs “what the relationship needs” • Rebuilding a marriage after loss and change If this episode resonated with you, share it with someone who’s navigating growth, love, or reinvention. Follow the podcast for new episodes every week. 🎙️ More about John: 📘 Pre order my new book, Love Hard On Purpose. Toss the blueprints. Build something honest. https://a.co/d/031PzkW4 John’s book publishing company: Soulprint https://www.soulprintmedia.co 📘 Read John’s book in progress Sh*t Your Therapist Would Never Tell You on John’s SubStack ⁠HERE⁠ If you’re ready for deeper work, the Secure Self course is available HERE Order John's new book, Break Up. On Purpose,⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Follow John on Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Find out more about John⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Some relationship patterns aren’t about the present. They’re about wounds your nervous system learned a long time ago. In this episode, John Kim breaks down some of the most common emotional wounds people carry into relationships, including abandonment, rejection, betrayal, control, emotional deprivation, and loss of self. He explains how these wounds become patterns, why we react instead of respond, and what healing actually looks like in real time. Key points covered: • Why wounds are about meaning, not just events • How childhood experiences shape adult relationship patterns • The difference between reacting from protection vs truth • Why people repeat the same emotional cycles in relationships • How abandonment and rejection wounds show up in everyday moments • What it means to create a corrective love experience John also shares personal reflections about rebuilding life after losing his home in the Altadena fires and moving into a new home in Costa Rica. He mentions his upcoming book, Love Hard on Purpose, and a private WhatsApp group for readers who pre-order the book. If this episode helped you, share it with someone who needs it and follow the podcast for more conversations on relationships, healing, and growth. 🎙️ More about John: 📘 Pre order my new book, Love Hard On Purpose. Toss the blueprints. Build something honest. https://a.co/d/031PzkW4 John’s book publishing company: Soulprint https://www.soulprintmedia.co 📘 Read John’s book in progress Sh*t Your Therapist Would Never Tell You on John’s SubStack ⁠HERE⁠ If you’re ready for deeper work, the Secure Self course is available HERE Order John's new book, Break Up. On Purpose,⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Follow John on Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Find out more about John⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this Therapy Thursdays episode, we’re answering your questions about dating, attraction, conflict, infidelity, and the messy middle of deciding whether a relationship is worth repairing. We explore what to look for when you’re dating, how much of your past to share with a partner, and whether physical attraction can grow over time. We also get into the harder questions: why a spouse might become distant after an affair, how to rebuild trust, when to go to couples counseling, and how to know whether conflict is healthy or a sign that something deeper is wrong. This episode also touches on emotional healing after heartbreak, finding yourself again, staying positive through difficult seasons, and why an ex might still be watching your life from a distance. Whether you’re dating, rebuilding, questioning, or letting go, this conversation is about learning to listen to yourself, understand the patterns at play, and make choices from clarity instead of fear. 🎙️ More about John: 📘 Pre order my new book, Love Hard On Purpose. Toss the blueprints. Build something honest. https://a.co/d/031PzkW4 📘 Read John’s book in progress Sh*t Your Therapist Would Never Tell You on John’s SubStack ⁠HERE⁠ If you’re ready for deeper work, the Secure Self course is available HERE Order John's new book, Break Up. On Purpose,⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Follow John on Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Find out more about John⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this deeply personal episode, John Kim revisits his story with fresh eyes and new perspective. From divorce and failed screenwriting dreams to becoming a therapist, building a life in Los Angeles, and then losing it all in a fire, he reflects on the defining “act breaks” that reshaped his identity. Now rebuilding in Costa Rica, John explores what it means to live without a blueprint and to design a life rooted in presence, courage, and truth. Key Points Covered • The difference between a life “chapter” and an “act break” • Losing his home in a fire and how it forced radical change • Letting go of a screenwriting dream and finding purpose as a therapist • Building the “Angry Therapist” platform through authenticity • How loss stripped away excuses and created space for reinvention • Redefining life, success, and home while rebuilding in Costa Rica If this story resonated with you, make sure to subscribe for more conversations on growth, relationships, and rebuilding your life. Mentions: John’s book publishing company: Soulprint https://www.soulprintmedia.co 🎙️ More about John: 📘 Pre order my new book, Love Hard On Purpose. Toss the blueprints. Build something honest. https://a.co/d/031PzkW4 📘 Read John’s book in progress Sh*t Your Therapist Would Never Tell You on John’s SubStack ⁠HERE⁠ If you’re ready for deeper work, the Secure Self course is available HERE Order John's new book, Break Up. On Purpose,⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Follow John on Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Find out more about John⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this episode, John explores why trying to bring a relationship back to what itonce was can quietly hold it back. Instead of restoring the past, he reframes love as something that must evolve alongside the people in it, requiring honesty, effort, and a willingness to grow together. He breaks down how relationships naturally fall out of alignment over time and why that doesn’t mean they’re broken. Through communication, truth-telling, and emotional capacity, alignment becomes something you build rather than something you either “have” or don’t. John shares three grounded ways to realign when things feel off, including telling the current truth, updating the relationship instead of restoring it, and focusing on willingness over perfection. The episode also touches on the idea that some relationships need to “die” in order to be rebuilt in a way that actually fits who both people are today. 🎙️ More about John: 📘 Pre order my new book, Love Hard On Purpose. Toss the blueprints. Build something honest. https://a.co/d/031PzkW4 📘 Read John’s book in progress Sh*t Your Therapist Would Never Tell You on John’s SubStack ⁠HERE⁠ If you’re ready for deeper work, the Secure Self course is available HERE Order John's new book, Break Up. On Purpose,⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Follow John on Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Find out more about John⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices