*]:pointer-events-auto scroll-mt-[calc(var(--header-height)+min(200px,max(70px,20svh)))]" dir="auto" tabindex="-1" data-turn-id= "request-6920a090-ad04-8322-ba7a-5ec27567cc94-1" data-testid= "conversation-turn-64" data-scroll-anchor="true" data-turn= "assistant"> "You were never meant to grieve quietly. Your emotions didn't show up to hurt you. They showed up to help you process what just happened." In this episode of Grieve That Shit, Sharon Brubaker, Certified Grief Specialist and founder of The Grief School, sits down with Nikki to talk about a kind of loss that cuts straight to the core. The loss of a mother who was also a best friend. After losing her nephew Austin, Sharon learned that grief isn't one-dimensional. There are layers. And one of the most overlooked layers is the grief that comes from losing the person who knew you, guided you, and helped you make sense of life. In this conversation, Nikki shares the story of her mom Cheryl. Not just who she was, but how deeply intertwined she was in every part of her life. From daily texts and phone calls to faith, caregiving, unanswered prayers, and the shock of having no time to prepare. This episode explores what happens when grief collides with faith, when anger at God feels unavoidable, and when the foundation you were raised on both supports you and breaks your heart at the same time. We talk about the reality of caregiving, the trauma of watching someone you love decline, and the quiet ways people stay connected after loss. Keeping a phone on. Sending messages that will never be answered. Letting grandchildren leave voicemails. Choosing connection instead of rules. This is an honest, raw conversation about layered grief, unfinished moments, and learning how to live in a world where your anchor is gone. You're not doing grief wrong. You're responding to something that mattered deeply. Let's grieve that shit together. What You'll Hear in This Episode • Why losing a mother who was also a best friend creates a second layer of grief • How caregiving changes the grief experience before death even happens • What it's like to have no time to process before everything changes • How faith can both comfort and anger you after loss • Why staying connected in your own way is not wrong • The difference between healing and erasing the relationship Reflection Questions Take your time with these. There's no rush. Who was your person to you beyond the title they held in your life? What part of your grief do you feel most people don't understand? Where has faith supported you, and where has it felt complicated or painful? What unfinished moments or conversations still live in your body? What connection are you holding onto that brings you comfort, even if others wouldn't understand it? If you stopped judging your grief, what would you allow yourself to feel? Gentle Homework Write this sentence at the top of a page: "What hurts the most about losing them is…" Let yourself finish it without fixing, explaining, or softening the answer. That honesty is part of your healing. Resources + Next Steps 🎥 Watch Sharon's grief teachings and video overviews 🎧 Explore deep-dive podcast episodes like this one 📘 Access study guides, journal prompts, and grief education 🧠 Continue your work inside The Grief School 👉 Everything lives at clickhereforhope.com You don't have to rush this. You don't have to be okay. You just have to be honest.