<p>The phrase "we opened up too fast" comes up <em>a lot</em> in the conversations we have with people who are transitioning from monogamy to non-monogamy. But what does "too fast" even mean? And more importantly—too fast for whom?</p><p>Here's the thing: once you've crossed certain thresholds in opening up, there's no going back to a state of unknowing. You can't unsee what you've seen or unknow what you've learned about yourself, your partner, and your relationship. This can feel scary, but it's also where some of the most profound growth happens.</p><p><strong>In this episode, we talk about:</strong></p><p>— Why "too fast" is really about thresholds, not speed</p><p>— How foiled expectations drive so much of our dysregulation in the opening process</p><p>— The difference between pacing that allows for skill-building versus holding so still that you never actually learn anything</p><p>— Why differentiation work matters just as much (if not more) than the logistics of who you're dating</p><p>— The power of imaginal work</p><p>— How to recognize when you're objectifying potential partners (couples privilege on steroids) and why that's a sign that you might not be ready yet</p><p>— The reality that monogamy skills don't all transfer to non-monogamy, but non-monogamy skills work everywhere</p><p>— Why learning resilience and repair skills is more important than getting everything "right" the first time</p><p>— The profound relief that comes from increased self-knowledge, even when relationships end</p><p>— How educational community and mentorship can provide the support that makes all the difference</p><p><strong>Resources mentioned in this episode:</strong></p><p>— Our <a href="https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PL2uD8qo_qKF72pzJTqcnQtnLo5rrk25IQ" rel="ugc noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">Neuro-Somatic Intelligence Essentials Playlist</a></p><p>— Our <a href="https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PL2uD8qo_qKF5izh7d3OfJO7wM6GCgC0Wj" rel="ugc noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">Nervous System Playlist</a></p><p>JOIN <a href="http://www.theyearofopening.com/" rel="ugc noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">The Year Of Opening®</a> community for a full year of learning &amp; support</p><p>Learn the <a href="https://www.jolihamilton.com/salon" rel="ugc noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">5 secrets to open your relationship the smart way</a></p><p>Are you ready to open your relationship happily? Find out at <a href="http://www.joliquiz.com/" rel="ugc noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">www.JoliQuiz.com</a></p><p>Get the answers you want to create the open relationship of your dreams! <a href="https://www.jolihamilton.com/ama" rel="ugc noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">Sign up for an Ask Me Anything here</a></p><p>Music: Dance of Felt by <a href="https://app.sessions.blue/browse/track/242798" rel="ugc noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">⁠Blue Dot Sessions</a></p>