Content warning: Mentions of sexual assault and child sexual abuse.We live within a system that allows sexual abuse of all kinds to flourish without much accountability, and because of that, a lot of us carry deep trauma around sex and intimacy. Rachel (Rae) Halder is one of those people, and she's also a certified trauma resolution and erotic embodiment coach with over a decade of experience helping others heal the same wounds she's been working to heal within herself.This episode deals with some heavy themes, buuuut we also talk about the Italian hippie who worshipped Rae like a sun goddess...so it's not all doom and gloom. Hehe! This is Happy Slut, after all!In this episode:Rae's journey from childhood sexual abuse survivor to trauma resolution and erotic embodiment coachRecovering a repressed memory years after the abuse occurredWhy our nervous systems dissociate, freeze, and fawn during sexHow unprocessed trauma gets stored in the bodyThe devastating gray area of consensual encounters that become traumatic experiencesWhy some people intellectually want sex while their bodies experience it as unsafeThe surprising ways trauma can masquerade as asexualityGrowing up Mennonite and questioning patriarchal ideas about God, gender, and sexualityStarting a groundbreaking blog about sexual violence before the #MeToo movementThe Italian hippie who accidentally sparked Rae's sexual awakeningGoddess worship, tantra, and discovering what truly safe erotic connection feels likeChronic illness, interstitial cystitis, and the connection between trauma and the bodyWhy agency, autonomy, and choice are essential ingredients for healingThe difference between wanting sex and feeling safe enough to receive pleasureHow survivors can reclaim their sexuality without forcing themselves past their body's limitsWhat "erotic safety" actually meansWhy healing often happens more slowly—and more gently—than we want it toFOLLOW RAE HALDER:Website: https://www.raehalder.com/Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/rachel.rae.halderReal Sex Substack: https://realsex.substack.com/FOLLOW SAMIA & HAPPY SLUT:Samia's Personal Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/samia.mounts/Happy Slut on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/happyslutcast/Happy Slut on TikTok: https://tiktok.com/@happyslutcastSUPPORT THE SHOW:Become a paying Substack subscriber: https://samiamounts.substack.comVenmo Samia: @Samia-Mounts / https://account.venmo.com/u/Samia-MountsCashApp Samia: $SamiaMounts / https://cash.app/$SamiaMountsEmail me your thoughts or pitches at [email protected]. I read every email!Thank you, pinecones! See ya next week.xoxo,SamiaMentioned in this episode:Get a 15% discount on all FirmTech products!Use code CLOSETED at check-out.Get 15% off Kenneth Play's Beyond Satisfied Pro course at www.kennethplay.com/closeted