SEO F**king What - Get Found on Google and make money from your website with practical SEO tips
SEO F**king What - Get Found on Google and make money from your website with practical SEO tips

SEO F**king What - Get Found on Google and make money from your website with practical SEO tips

Nikki Pilkington

Overview
Episodes

Details

This podcast exists because you deserve better than the SEO bollocks currently being sold to you. Every week, I'll give you 10-15 minutes of straight talk about SEO. Practical advice that actually works for B2B websites trying to get found on Google/search and make money. The kind of stuff that's been proven over years, not dreamed up last Tuesday by some LinkedIn tosspot. Real SEO from someone who's been doing this since dial-up was considered fast. I'll tell you what works, what's complete nonsense, and which tactics will get your website buried faster than you can say "guaranteed first page rankings." I'm calling out the bullshitters. The agencies promising the world and delivering fuck all. The LinkedIn gooroos flogging courses about things that don't actually exist. The AI SEO "hacks" destroying perfectly good websites. The expensive tools you don't need. The "experts" who learned SEO from a YouTube video three months ago. If someone's talking bollocks about SEO, you'll hear about it here. More importantly, I'm telling you what to do instead. Every rant comes with actual, practical steps you can take. Real actions that get results, not theory that sounds clever but does bugger all for your rankings. "Do this, then do that, and you'll see movement." That's it. That's the format. You're running a B2B business or managing a B2B website. You've probably been burned by an SEO agency before. Maybe they took your money and delivered a fancy report full of words that meant absolutely nothing. Or they promised first page rankings and disappeared after six months of bugger all results. You're sick of reading blog posts that say nothing in 2000 words. You're tired of SEO "tips" that are either blindingly obvious or completely bizarre. You want someone to cut through the crap and tell you what actually matters for your business, not what works for some massive ecommerce site with a budget the size of a small country. You don't need a PhD in technical SEO. You need to know what's worth your time and what's complete bollocks. You need to know which tactics will actually bring in leads and which ones are just expensive ways to make yourself feel busy. That's what I'm here for. This isn't some sanitised, corporate-approved SEO podcast where everyone's lovely and we pretend all tactics are equally valid. They're not. Some are brilliant. Most are pointless. And some will actively fuck up your website while the "expert" who recommended them is off selling the same dodgy advice to the next poor sod. I swear. A lot. If that bothers you, there are plenty of other podcasts out there with hosts who never offend anyone. Go find them. They're very nice. They're also very boring. This also isn't a podcast that assumes you're stupid. You're not. You're just busy running a business and don't have time to decode the latest algorithm update or work out which SEO tactic is legitimate and which one's complete fantasy. Fifteen minutes. One topic. I'll tell you what's pissing me off this week in the SEO industry, why it matters to your website, and what you should actually do about it. Then I'm done. You can get back to running your business. New episodes drop weekly, because the SEO industry creates fresh bullshit faster than I can rant about it. Subscribe wherever you listen to podcasts so you don't miss the next time some gooroo invents a new problem to sell you the solution to. Welcome to SEO F**king What? Let's fix your website.

Recent Episodes

What AI-built websites actually get right
MAY 17, 2026
What AI-built websites actually get right
"The thing about AI-built websites that the doom merchants don't want to admit — some of this stuff is really good. Not good for something a machine did, actually good, and in some cases better than I see on plenty of human-built sites."Hi, I’m Nikki Pilkington. My site is https://nikki-pilkington.com/ and in this episode of “SEO F**king What”, this is Part Two of my AI Website series — and if you didn’t build your site with AI, don’t switch off. A lot of what I cover here applies to traditionally-built websites too.I audited five AI-built B2B websites in April 2026. Proper audits — SE Ranking crawls, manual HTML review, page speed insights, schema testing, the lot. I went in expecting a horror show. What I found was much more interesting.Here’s what I’m covering:Why AI-built websites look genuinely good — and what that means for small business owners who couldn’t previously afford proper designHow AI handles mobile layouts correctly as standard (and why plenty of human-built sites still can’t say the same)Why the site structure and navigation of AI-built sites makes sense — and why yours might not anymoreThe forms, validation, and error handling that actually work (unlike that contact form you probably don’t know is broken)Why three of the five sites had genuinely thoughtful commercial pages — comparison pages, “is this right for you” pages, and decision-support contentHow AI approached schema markup — what it got right, and the teaser for what went wrong in Episode ThreeI also give you a piece of homework. Not the vague “something to think about” kind. The go-and-check-it-this-week kind: look at your commercial pages and ask whether they’re actually helping someone make a decision.If you’ve been dismissing AI websites out of hand, or if you’ve built one and been told it’s worthless, this episode is for you. And yes, Episode Three is where things get uncomfortable — but that’s next week.Get found. Make money. Stop stressing. Start giving a shit about your readers.Links mentioned:Non-Wanky SEO Courses: https://nonwankyseo.comFollow Nikki:LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/nikkipilkington/Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/nikkipilkington/Bluesky: https://bsky.app/profile/nikkipilkington.bsky.socialMentioned in this episode:Join our blogging masterclassBlogging Masterclass
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9 MIN
Stop Buying Backlinks FFS! Here are your REAL link building tactics.
MAY 3, 2026
Stop Buying Backlinks FFS! Here are your REAL link building tactics.
"Someone sitting in your LinkedIn DMs right now is offering you backlinks for 99. Someone else wants to charge you five a month for a robust link building campaign. And I'm here to tell you that for most small B2B service websites, both of them can fuck right off."Hi, I'm Nikki Pilkington. My site is https://nikki-pilkington.com/ and in this episode of “SEO F**king What”, I'm calling out one of the most expensive myths in SEO — that spending money on backlinks is something small B2B service businesses need to do. It isn't. And I've got 30 years of evidence to prove it.Here’s what I’m covering:Why Google’s original algorithm got gamed almost immediately — and how the link building industry was born from exploiting itThe Penguin update of 2012: why thousands of legitimate businesses lost their rankings overnight, while the agencies who sold them manipulative links quietly updated their service pages and moved onWhat Google actually confirmed in 2024 about how much links matter now (their words: “we’ve made links less important”)Why the link building industry is still thriving — despite selling something worth a fraction of what it once wasThe free, legitimate links you’re probably already entitled to through professional memberships and directories — and not usingWhy on-page SEO, quality content, and a well-structured website will do more for your rankings than any link package sold by someone who DMed you 15 minutes after following you on LinkedInI also give you a proper piece of homework this week. Three things to do right now. None of them cost a penny.If you’re currently paying for a link building package — or you’ve ever been tempted — listen to this first. It might save you a lot of money and a lot of future headaches.Get found. Make money. Stop buying fucking backlinks.Links mentionedNon-Wanky SEO Courses: https://nonwankyseo.comGoogle Search Console (backlink report — Legacy Tools, bottom of left-hand menu): https://search.google.com/search-console/Ahrefs Free Backlink Checker: https://ahrefs.com/backlink-checkerFollow NikkiLinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/nikkipilkington/Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/nikkipilkington/Bluesky: https://bsky.app/profile/nikkipilkington.bsky.socialMentioned in this episode:Join our blogging masterclassBlogging Masterclass
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13 MIN
Your Meta descriptions are fu*ked! I'll help you fix 'em.
APR 26, 2026
Your Meta descriptions are fu*ked! I'll help you fix 'em.
Hi, I'm Nikki Pilkington. My site is https://nikki-pilkington.com/ and in this episode of "SEO F**king What", I'm talking about the one bit of SEO that isn't a ranking factor but is absolutely the thing that decides whether anyone actually clicks on your listing — your meta descriptions. You've probably never written one, duplicated the same one across your whole site, or let Yoast bully you into stuffing it with keywords. All three are fucked.Here's what I'm covering:— Why your meta description isn't a ranking factor — but still decides whether anyone clicks— What a good meta description actually does (and the 155-character rule)— Why Google bolds search terms, and why that matters for getting clicks— The parade of horrors: missing descriptions, duplicate descriptions, and corporate waffle— Why the Yoast green light isn't the goal — writing for a human is— A proper before-and-after for an HR consultant that shows you exactly what to write— The Mark Williams-Cook argument for not writing them at all — and why I still say you should, for small B2B sitesI also give you proper homework. Three things to do this week that will sort out your meta descriptions without taking all day.If you know someone whose search result description reads like it was written by a committee, send them this. It might be the reason they're not getting the clicks they deserve.Get found. Make money. Stop stressing. Write it for a human.Links mentioned:Non-Wanky SEO Courses: https://nonwankyseo.comSearchPilot meta description research: https://www.searchpilot.comFollow Nikki:LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/nikkipilkington/Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/nikkipilkington/Bluesky: https://bsky.app/profile/nikkipilkington.bsky.socialMentioned in this episode:Join our blogging masterclassBlogging Masterclass
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14 MIN
Your H1 and Meta Titles Are Killing Your Rankings FFS!
APR 19, 2026
Your H1 and Meta Titles Are Killing Your Rankings FFS!
Your homepage H1 says “Welcome.” Your meta title says “Home.” And you’re wondering why Google won’t rank you. In this episode, Nikki Pilkington explains why H1s and meta titles are two different jobs, why making them identical is a missed opportunity, and why making them disconnected is actively killing your SEO.You’ll learn how to think of your meta title as the promise and your H1 as the delivery, why “Helping your people thrive” is not a heading, why your company name almost certainly doesn’t belong in your H1, and why Yoast’s green smiley face is not a ranking factor. There’s homework at the end — a proper site audit you can do this week without spending a penny.Chapters0:00 Why Titles Kill Rankings1:57 What Meta Titles & H1s Actually Are4:09 Making Them Match the Search6:05 Your Homepage H1 Needs Work7:20 Why Your Company Name Isn’t Your H17:49 Yoast Isn’t Your Brain9:00 Your Homework This Week10:50 Non-Wanky On-Page SEO CourseCourse mentionedNon-Wanky On-Page SEO — £200 or £20/month: https://nonwankyseo.comTools mentionedGoogle Search Console: https://search.google.com/search-consolePrevious episodes referenced— Episode 13 — Stop Blogging Like It's a Diary— Episode 14 — Your Competitors SEO Geniuses?...— Episode 19 — Google Search Console...Follow NikkiWebsite: https://nikki-pilkington.com/LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/nikkipilkington/Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/nikkipilkington/Bluesky: https://bsky.app/profile/nikkipilkington.bsky.social
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13 MIN