<p>Ever wanted to make the first move and just… froze? </p><p>Initiating is one of the most vulnerable things we do, and almost nobody talks about how hard it is.</p><p>This week Jay-Jay Feeney and somatic sex and relationship coach Melissa Vranjes get into how to initiate sex without the fear of rejection: why it can feel scarier than the sex itself, how to handle a "no" without spiralling, and the tiny shifts that bring desire back to life in long-term relationships.</p><br><p>Inside this episode:</p><ul><li>Why initiating feels so loaded (and why long-term love makes it harder, not easier)</li><li>The one-word response to "no" that stops the shame spiral in its tracks</li><li>Mismatched desire; are you and your partner even speaking the same language?</li><li>Ovens vs gas hobs: why "preheating" outside the bedroom changes everything</li><li>Emily Nagoski's gateways into desire: play, care and curiosity</li><li>Real, low-stakes ways to initiate tonight: flirty texts, kissing, music, massage</li><li>Plus your Pleasure Practice DMs, including the "I was <em>meant</em> to be the submissive one" plot twist</li><li><br></li></ul><p>Whether you're the one who always makes the first move, the one who's given up trying, or somewhere in between, this one's for you.</p><br><p>How to Have Sex is a shame-free sex education podcast hosted by broadcaster Jay-Jay Feeney and certified sex and relationship coach Melissa Vranjes. Every episode is designed to educate, inform, and start the conversations that most of us were never taught to have.</p><br><p> This podcast is proudly sponsored by <strong>Wild Secrets</strong>.</p><p> Shop online at <a href="http://www.wildsecrets.co.nz/" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">www.wildsecrets.co.nz</a> &amp; use the code <strong>HAVESEX</strong> for 20% off sitewide…</p><p> Pleasure Delivered.</p><br><p> <strong>SUBSCRIBE TO OUR SUBSTACK </strong><a href="https://hthspodcast.substack.com/" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">https://hthspodcast.substack.com</a></p><p><strong> INSTAGRAM </strong><a href="https://www.instagram.com/howtohavesexpodcast" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">https://www.instagram.com/howtohavesexpodcast</a></p><p> <strong>FACEBOOK </strong><a href="https://www.facebook.com/HowToHaveSexPodcast" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">https://www.facebook.com/HowToHaveSexPodcast</a></p><p> <strong>YOUTUBE</strong> <a href="https://www.youtube.com/@Howtohavesexpodcast" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">https://www.youtube.com/@Howtohavesexpodcast</a></p><p> <strong>EMAIL</strong> <a href="mailto:[email protected]" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">[email protected]</a></p><p> <strong>Support the podcast! </strong><a href="https://buymeacoffee.com/howtohavesex" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">https://buymeacoffee.com/howtohavesex</a></p><p> </p><p> How To Have Sex is produced by <strong>PodLab</strong>, Auckland. <a href="https://www.podlab.co.nz/" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">https://www.podlab.co.nz</a></p><br><p> <strong>HOSTS:</strong></p><p><strong> Jay-Jay Feeney</strong> – Media Personality</p><p> Instagram/TikTok: @JJFeeneyNZ</p><p> Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/JayJayFeeney</p><p> </p><p> <strong>Melissa Vranjes – </strong>Certified Somatic Sex &amp; Relationship Coach</p><p> www.melissavranjes.com</p><p> Instagram: @melissavranjes</p><p> </p><p> Ready to feel more confident, connected, and turned on in your body?<strong> Join Sex School here: </strong>https://www.melissavranjes.com/sex-school</p><p><strong> </strong></p><p> </p><p><strong> </strong></p><p><strong> </strong></p><hr><p style='color:grey; font-size:0.75em;'> Hosted on Acast. See <a style='color:grey;' target='_blank' rel='noopener noreferrer' href='https://acast.com/privacy'>acast.com/privacy</a> for more information.</p>