Ep 191. Why Nothing External Will Ever Fill The Internal Void, with Katrina Loewe

My guest this week is Katrina Loewe, a mum of three boys who lived 47 years in internal chaos before a spiritual awakening turned her life around. On the outside, Katrina had everything, a beautiful family, a beautiful home, and a life many would envy. On the inside, she was drowning in perfectionism, shame she had carried since her teens, and a growing disconnection from herself that eventually led her through four hospitalisations in the space of nine and a half weeks. Katrina shares what it was like to hit a point where nothing external could fix her anymore, the moment she finally reached out for real help, and how meditation, connection, and a complete willingness to change gave her a life she had never known was possible. She talks openly about perfectionism, people pleasing, the shame of being away from her children while seeking treatment, and what it means to finally feel at peace in your own life. This is a moving conversation about what transformation can look like when it has nothing to do with rock bottom in the traditional sense, and everything to do with finally coming home to yourself. Episode chapters: 00:00 Introducing Katrina Loewe 05:14 The Photo: Hiding Behind the Smile 08:52 A Wholesome Childhood and the First Signs of Not Fitting In 13:14 A Difficult Family Holiday and Years of Carrying Shame 26:20 Becoming a Stepmum, IVF, and Chasing "I'll Be Happy When" 30:52 Suffocating Behind a Perfect Life 33:22 Losing Her Father and the Grief She Never Processed 36:43 The Trip Around Australia and the Start of the Unravelling 38:04 When Drinking Crept In 40:53 Four Hospitals in Nine and a Half Weeks 46:13 The Instagram Post That Changed Everything 51:20 What Her Relationship with Alcohol Looks Like Today 57:19 Releasing the Shame and Living Without Apology 01:00:16 Three Non-Negotiables for a Happy, Authentic Life Join Ash’s community newsletter! Click the link here to join. Upcoming Workshops: The Renewal Ritual | September 13th | Buy Tickets Here Upcoming Retreats: The Embodied Woman | Gold Coast | April 21 - 25, 2027 A Sacred Return | Bali | August 16 - 20, 2027 Email [email protected] for more details! Follow and connect with Ash on: ⁠Instagram⁠ @ashbutterss TikTok @behindthesmilewithashb Website⁠ www.ashbutterss.com Watch Ash’s TEDx Talk here! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.