The Teacher With A Pet Flea In A Locket (Weird Substitute Teachers)

You haven't truly had an eating disorder until you eat ten bunless Big Macs with a knife and fork 😙  Today we remember why high school kids are the most ruthless people on earth and why putting Pepto-Bismol in your math teacher's coffee is rat tail kid activity. Don't act like you wouldn't sign up for a government-funded week of going back to high school at age 35 just so you can cater lunch from Qdoba and depants your bois in the hallway 😎 Love ya fam see ya sunday🫡 ------------------------------------------------- Send this to your homies to support the pod! https://www.patreon.com/benedictpolizzi  ☕️FOLLOW ON IG https://www.instagram.com/espressobenny/ 💕 WATCH BENNY on FBOY & FGIRL ISLAND on HBO MAX 🧢 "𝗕𝗔𝗟𝗗"𝗮𝘁 𝗰𝗵𝗲𝗰𝗸𝗼𝘂𝘁 𝗳𝗼𝗿 𝟱𝟬% 𝗢𝗙𝗙 𝗔𝗟𝗟 𝗠𝗘𝗥𝗖𝗛 https://benedictmerch.com/ ------------------------------------------------- **TIMESTAMP CHAPTERS** **0:00 - Intro** **2:40 - Leaving your car running for four hours while substitute teaching** **5:35 - Playing indoor ruler baseball with Mr. Bogardis** **7:50 - Mrs. Anderson and the hair scarf showdown** **9:00 - Proposing high school week for thirty-five-year-olds** **12:15 - Hiring pale nerds and the situational hotness trap** **17:45 - The substitute teacher with a pet flea in a locket** **21:45 - Art class prop comedy and calling the ice cream shop on a stapler** **25:50 - Turning in your Scratten and religion class junk resituating** **29:10 - Mr. French's Assateague Island elementary camping trip** **36:05 - Searing cream cheese bagels on the bottom of a dirty shoe** **38:50 - Shuffling I hate Miss Phillips messages onto math quizzes** **42:20 - Spotting the Chris Farley lookalike sub eating wings at Hooters** **46:30 - Native American lesbian PE teachers screaming about untied shoes** **52:40 - Off pizza for four months and fighting the pizza demons**