#141 How to Stop Being Jealous

Jealousy is one of the most human emotions there is, and for many women it gets louder in midlife. In this episode, Jane answers a question from Sandy, a listener who just turned 50. A new neighbor has moved in who seems to have everything: a "perfect" body, a successful husband, plenty of money, and a warm welcome from Sandy's friends. Sandy feels tortured, can't stop thinking about her, and feels ridiculous for feeling this way. Jane explains why jealousy isn't the neighbor's fault, how the Self-Coaching Model shows that our thoughts create the feeling, and how to move from scarcity to abundance. She also shares a five-step process you can use the next time the sting hits. In this episode, you'll learn Why feeling jealous doesn't make you a bad person The difference between jealousy and envy, and why the tools work for both How the Self-Coaching Model (Circumstance, Thought, Feeling, Action, Result) shows where jealousy really comes from Why jealousy is a scarcity story ("she won, so I lost") and how to break it Why comparing your insides to someone else's outsides always leaves you short How jealousy can point you toward what you truly want, and whether you really want it A five-step process: notice it, find the thought, look for the insecurity, choose a new thought on purpose, and ask four powerful questions A simple challenge for this week: get curious about her instead of treating her as competition Key takeaway Someone else's blessing isn't a withdrawal from your account. There is enough, for her and for you. Scripture referenced Proverbs 14:30 (NIV): "A heart at peace gives life to the body, but envy rots the bones." Resources and mentions Coaching concepts adapted from Brooke Castillo, The Life Coach School Podcast, Ep #21: "Jealousy": Have a question for the show? Send it in, and it may be answered on a future episode of Happy in the Middle. Send your question to [email protected] 🍂 Fall Coaching Special: Private coaching sessions at $100 each, the lowest pricing since Jane started coaching in 2019. Book for yourself, for the two of you as a couple, or as a Christmas gift for your adult children. Offer Ends October 31st.: Six Sessions for only $600! https://www.jane-copier.com/offers/xyZ2hxkR Single Sessions, $150 https://www.jane-copier.com/offers/Kzt7DW7E/checkout Love this episode? Share it with another couple who could use a little help lightening up this season, and leave a review so more Gen X Christian women can find us. 🤗 Thanks for listening, please like, subscribe, and leave me a 5 star review, so that I can continue to provide helpful relationship content for all of us. Book a Free Consultation with Jane Get my FREE Marriage Reset Starter Kit: https://www.jane-copier.com/StarterKit Welcome to Happy in the Middle, with your host, The Christian Marriage Coach, Jane Copier. I’m Jane Copier, and you're listening to Happy in the Middle, a podcast for Christian women navigating marriage, family relationships, and the beautiful work of becoming who God created them to be. As the Christian Marriage Coach, each week I offer practical tools and faith-filled conversations to help women just like you, create deeper connection, healthier communication, and a life, -and marriage, they love to coming home to. Let’s dive in! 3 Simple Steps to Leave an iTunes Review: Click here to listen in iTunes: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/happy-in-the-middle-a-podcast-for-christian-midlife-women/id1715566489 Scroll down until you see the reviews, and then click the button that says, “Leave a Review” Leave your review! Easy peasy! Find Jane at: Website: https://janecopiercoaching.com TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@christianmarriagecoach IG: https://www.instagram.com/jane.copier.coaching/ FB: https://www.facebook.com/LDSChristianMarriageCoach Email: [email protected] ❤️ Fell like private coaching is a better fit for you? I'd be honored to walk with you. Book a Free Consultation